Who Lies Beneath
by ocdwithlhg
Summary: LL. There's only one thing that can stop me. She told her best friend... She's made many mistake before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before? COMPLETE.
1. No Turning Back

**Who Lies Beneath**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, so therefore don't sue me. Gilmore girls belongs to ASP and the WB.

**Summary: **LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistake before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

**Authors Note:** Here for you is the first chapter of Who Lies Beneath. :o) This is another story that Annick and I are doing together, it took close to a month to finally post this but we finally have it. The story is completely AU (alternate universe). We know it wouldn't happen on the show and that's sort of what I want to make clear, AU writing's just for fun.

Thanks for all the support from all the other stories and we hope you guys like this just as much as WHAT Lies Beneath. And just to let everybody know, you didn't have to have read What Lies Beneath though it doesn't hurt ;) to understand this story, they're completely different. We just thought the similar titles are funny.

Enjoy the chapter and please leave a review!

* * *

**Chapter One: No Turning Back**

Too bad it wasn't cold outside because then at least her coffee cravings would make more sense. Even though she's all for it because of the taste, not the comforting warmth it provides her with, it'd still be a good excuse for Mr. Gruff. But today, it was _muggy_ outside and the warm summer breeze blew Lorelai's hair in every direction as she walked to the diner to get her daily fix.

"It…is _so_ hot out there!" She said as she walked into the diner, taking a seat at the counter while smiling at Luke. "Coffee please!" She asked radiantly.

"It's 100 degrees out there," he handed her a glass of cold water, "take this for now."

She grimaced and took what could hardly be considered a sip, the glass barely touching her mouth while a drop rolled over her lips.

"There, happy? Coffee please!"

Giving up, he poured her a cup of coffee. "Angel." She took a long sip of her coffee and looked up at him. "You know…you should have iced coffee."

Luke rolled his eyes and went into the back leaving Lorelai there to talk to herself about why iced coffee in the summer would make so much sense.

He came back a few moments later with a glass of ice. He walked up to her and poured it into her cup.

"There. Iced coffee."

"Luke!" She screamed. "By asking for iced coffee, I didn't mean ice _with_ coffee!"

"Oh." He acted as if he didn't know what she was talking about. "My bad. Go to Starbucks then. This is a diner."

"You're moody today. Someone wake up on the wrong side of the bed?"

Luke rolled his eyes and fiddled with the order forms scattered near the cash register.

"Oh wait, you can't wake up on the wrong side of the bed—because it's too small!" She laughed at her pathetic joke. "Why aren't you laughing?"

"Sorry, did you say something funny?" He asked looking up at her.

Unsure of whether he was actually mad at her or just something in general, she still poked her head where it didn't belong.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter. Just because I don't have a king size bed for myself doesn't mean that I can't wake up on the wrong side of the bed." He barked.

"Okay, okay, gosh calm down. You can wake up on the wrong side of the bed." She gave in.

"Thank you. I mean, I'd rather have a small bed for myself than a large one that I'd have to _share_ with somebody else."

"You know Luke," she took a sip of the water he gave her before, "sharing it with somebody actually means you'd _be_ with somebody."

"I know."

"Well that's wrong with that?" She asked curiously. "Don't you like having somebody around? I know Rachel just left but she's not the only one for you, ya know."

He looked up from his work and stared at her. She arched an eyebrow and continued.

"There will be other people you'll date in this lifetime. Trust me buddy, I know a lot of people have lost faith in you but at heart, I know you won't be a bachelor for life."

"Don't bite your tongue." He mumbled.

"What? Don't you want to date somebody…maybe one day get married?"

He laughed pathetically and shook his head. "Not the slightest bit."

"Why not?"

"Marriage is stupid." He admitted, not caring about her feelings. "You engage in a stupid vow promising you'll spend the rest of your life with someone that chances are, you'll get sick of after a week of living with them! You'll realize living with the cats would be better than having to wake up sprawled on top of somebody and fight over the bathroom that's joined to your room because after a while, a little time together makes you not even want to be near each other at all!"

"What in the" Lorelai began.

"And what's with the whole in sickness and health crap for? Chances are when you get sick your 'partner' will get sick also because he can't keep our hands off of you."

Was he _trying_ to make her feel bad? Because if so…it was working.

"_What_ do you _mean_?" You're completely contradicting yourself Luke. First you say you won't be able to look at your spouse because the thought alone makes you want to vomit, but now you're saying because they can't stop pawing at you, they'll get sick too? What kind of half-ass crap is this?" She asked suddenly getting mad.

Realizing that he couldn't back up his previous statement, he said the first thing that came to his mind. "It's stupid is what it is. Living with the same person, seeing them every second of the day, never being able to mingle with other people…"

"Luke! Marriage is for people who _want_ to commit! We're not in Sparta. Daddies don't auction off their daughters! It's not like going into marriage you're not ready for these things."

"Nobody's ever ready for anything! Marriage's just"

"You know what?" She got up and grabbed her purse. "I'm going to go. I have things to get ready for my _wedding_ next week."

Luke mumbled something under his breath and looked up at her.

"Clearly not everybody's ready for commitment." She made eye contact with him. "And clearly, some people won't put those hateful feelings aside just to spare their best friend some happiness instead of making her feel like the biggest screw up that's ever walked the face of the Earth."

Finally realizing that he hurt her, he thought about apologizing but didn't because she walked towards the door too quickly.

"Thanks a lot, Luke."

* * *

_August Twelfth_

The town looked absolutely beautiful. It looked the exact same way both Lorelai and Rory pictured it too look. Emily was even pleased with the way it looked. Light colors, soft pinks and whites, strewn across the square illuminating the day even more so.

The crowd was small. There were probably 40 close friends and family mingling with each other before the ceremony actually started in just about 20 minutes or so. Kirk was running around taking pictures at every available moment and enjoying every single snap. Rory was gathered in a group of people, most of them congratulating her and asking how excited she was for her mother to get married. Her answers were all positives ones, smiling in everybody's direction before running off before she had to walk down the aisle with Sookie, followed by her mom who at this point was having an internal meltdown.

"Mom!" Rory said walking into Miss Patty's, shutting the door behind her.

"Leave that open." Lorelai said walking up to the door and pushing it back open.

"Are you ready? The ceremony starts in about 15 minutes."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm just—can you scootch over real quick?" She moved Rory away from the door and peeked her head out the large doors.

"You can't see Max yet!" Rory said pulling her back inside but Lorelai refused, sticking her head back out the door ever so casually glancing both left and right, avoiding the actual center of the square.

"Come in here." Rory closed the doors and dragged her mom over to the mirror hanging on the wall.

They both stood in front of the mirror, Rory more or less behind Lorelai and her poofy white dress.

"I'm glad you chose the tiara." Rory said smiling.

"Me too. Grandma loves it." Lorelai said nodding her head.

"You look beautiful, mom."

Lorelai turned around and smiled at Rory, taking a hold of one of her arms.

"Aw, thanks babe. You look great yourself."

"Thanks. I like to think I got my dress skills from you."

"Actually I like to think your dad gave them to you." She said laughing.

Rory laughed and shook her head. "Are you nervous?"

Lorelai grinned. "A little."

"You excited?"

"Yes I am," she said smiling childishly, "how 'bout you? Are you excited?"

"I'm very excited."

"Well then good."

"But today's about you and Max, who by the way, will think you stood him up if Grandpa doesn't get here soon."

"He wishes he could get that lucky." Lorelai said winking.

Right then somebody knocked lightly on the door causing both girls to jump.

"Who's there?" Lorelai asked in act.

"It's me." Richard said from outside the doors. Rory walked over and let him inside.

"Wow, Lorelai." Richard walked over to Lorelai and gave her a small hug. "You look beautiful." He said admiring the sight.

Lorelai smiled foolishly, already loving all the compliments. "Thanks daddy."

"Are you ready? The crowd is already growing impatient."

"Well, wow, yeah." Lorelai straightened out her dress. "I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

She held onto her dads arm a little early, afraid that she'd lose her balance because suddenly her legs grew very weak.

"How come I wasn't nervous up until this moment?"

Richard laughed. "It's traditional for the bride to be nervous before walking down the aisle. I can assure you that Max is nervous as we speak. I know I was extremely nervous before I saw Emily." He drifted off, thinking about the time that he was in the position of Max and Lorelai, youthful and happy.

"Wait!" Lorelai said before Rory opened the doors. "Where's Sookie?"

Rory opened the door and stuck her head out to view Sookie talking on her cell phone.

"I said three pounds not two, what do you think we're a bunch of anorexic people out here?" Rory laughed and wagged a finger for Sookie to come inside but she ignored it. "Claude, I told you guys everyday for the past 2 months including yesterday when I lectured you guys over and over again, wrote it on a piece of paper and stuck it on the refrigerator with it's own individual post it above it saying 'READ ME!'" She shouted. "Fine, do whatever you have to do, I'm going." She hung up her cell phone and walked into Miss Patty's.

"Oh, Lorelai!" Sookie said running up to her and practically toppling her over with her warm hug. "You look amazing!" Sookie raved.

"Thanks sweetie! You do too!" Lorelai said taking a step back and looking over Sookie.

"Sorry I'm late, something at the Inn." Sookie said not needing to explain.

"I'm sure everything's fine, Sookie." Lorelai said reassuring her.

"Of course, of course. Well, I think it's about that time."

As if that was said on cue, the music started playing from across the street and sure enough, they could all hear it. The sound almost made Lorelai fall over yet again.

"Ready my lady?" Sookie said taking Rory's hand.

"I'm ready." Rory and Sookie headed out the doors, walking their way across the street. Richard watched from the corner of his eye and when he saw that they had stopped near the top of the gazebo, it was time for him to take his daughter on their own stroll.

"Are you ready?" He asked calmly, smiling as he admired his daughter.

She took a deep breath and returned the smile. "I'm ready."

They walked out and followed their path towards the gazebo. Lorelai couldn't look in a single direction though. Her eyes moved frantically in every direction but didn't find what she was looking for.

She took her first glance at Max all day. He beamed at her as she walked down the path to the head of the gazebo. Before returning the 'beam', she looked around, careful to move only her eyes, not her head. 'Huh.' She thought to herself. She focused on Max. He looked great. She gave him a full body check, grinning in his way as everybody observed their looks to each other. _Almost_ everybody at least.

She looked absolutely beautiful, he thought. Of course he always thought she was beautiful, no matter if she had just gotten up, or had just been crying at the movie they had been watching, she always looked beautiful. But right now—he didn't know she could look _this_ beautiful.

She took her last steps with her father before he let go of her arm and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

He was letting his little girl go and enter a whole new world.

_xxxx_

The ceremony went well. There weren't many pairs of dry eyes left in the crowd, including Lorelai.

Good thinking, she mentally complimented herself, for choosing water proof mascara.

It was only about 45 minutes into the reception party and just about everybody had congratulated Lorelai and Max. Everybody that came, at least.

"Hey stranger." Lorelai said walking up to Max while he was in the middle of finishing up a conversation with somebody.

Max turned around and gave her a light kiss. "Lorelai, hey."

"You know," Lorelai whispered as she pulled Max closer to her, "I was just thinking and I came up with this idea."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," she trailed her finger from his jaw to chin, down from his chest, working its way lower and lower on this body, "how does ditching the party for a few minutes sound?" She asked seductively.

Max kissed her and before things got too carried away, pulled away from her, laughing. "I think they'd realize if we were all of a sudden AWOL."

"Maybe," she said nodding her head, "but who cares?"

Max's eyes averted to the woman rapidly walking towards them. "I wouldn't but I think your mother would."

Lorelai's eyes narrowed. "My mot"

"Lorelai Gilmore!" Emily practically shouted while walking up to them.

"Mom!" She turned around surprised.

"Come here young lady." She said strictly.

"Jeez what did I do wrong mom?"

"Come here." She grabbed her arm and pulled her away from Max. "We'll be just a second, Max."

"No problem." He said letting Lorelai go.

Emily grabbed Lorelai by the arm and started walking in the opposite direction. Lorelai turned around and mouthed 'I'll be right back' to Max.

"Okay, okay, slow down. I think we're isolated enough that if I wanted to punch you right now, nobody would see."

Emily glared at her daughter. "I don't think it's appropriate to practically be undressing your husband with your eyes, Lorelai."

"Oh my." Lorelai sighed deeply.

"There are people _watching_ you Lorelai. Don't you think you can control yourself till you guys are alone?"

"Man that sounds dirty coming from your mouth." Lorelai giggled.

"You're not a comedian, Lorelai. There's no need to joke constantly."

"Oh that wasn't a joke, that was the truth."

"Well just don't let it happen again." She barked. "Now let's go back to the party."

Emily started walking away while Lorelai laughed quietly before calling her mom. "Hey mom?"

Emily turned around and waited for her to speak.

"You look beautiful." Lorelai said honestly.

Emily's lips curved into a small smile as she looked over her daughter.

"You look beautiful too, Lorelai."

Lorelai's eyes raised and voice grew quieter. "Thank you."

Lorelai walked past her mother as she headed back over to Max.

"And Lorelai?"

"Yes mom?"

"Congratulations. I'm very happy for you."

Lorelai slowly smiled, happy that for once in her life her mother was happy with something she did.

"I'm glad."

She worked her way back over towards Max. As she walked in his direction she looked every which way, looking around frantically.

Nope.

"Hey babe." She said coming up to him.

"Perfect timing." He said as his eyes averted to Patty and Babette who were walking over to the couple.

"There you guys are!" Patty said, throwing her arms in the arm frantically.

"We've been trying to say congratulations all night!" Babette added.

"Oh, well…we're here!"

"Ya look gorgeous, darling."

"Oh thank you Babette. You girls look pretty hot yourself." Lorelai said jokingly.

"And Max, my, my. I never knew you cleaned up this nice."

Max laughed uncomfortably. "You ladies look great."

They both batted their eye lashes and smiled. "We just wanted to say congratulations and that everything's been beautiful tonight! We'll catch ya guys later."

"Bye ladies!" Lorelai called.

"Bye."

"So," Lorelai said turning to Max, "shall we dance?"

"Right this way." He said guiding her to the dance floor.

He led her to the dance floor as the music poured from the speakers surrounding what posed as the dance floor for the night.

She positioned herself in his arms, one hand holding his, the other wrapped around his upper waist as he placed his arm low around her waist. They stayed close to each other, moving very slowly with the music. Cheek to cheek, Max whispered something in her ear causing her to smile.

"You too." She whispered back, tightening her grip around his waist.

_xxxx_

"So, you have everything you need right?"

"I have everything I need, mom." Rory said slightly rolling her eyes, laughing because her mom must have asked her that 100 times. Perhaps it was the amount of alcohol she consumed though it didn't seem like that was really it. After all, she only had a few glasses of wine. She wanted to _remember_ this night.

"Alright well, we'll see you tomorrow then." She said leaning in and kissing her on the cheek.

Rory pulled her into a hug and whispered into her ear, "tonight was great. Did you have fun?"

"I had the best time." Lorelai said smiling.

"Good."

Rory pulled away and smiled at Max. "Congratulations you two."

"Thank you Rory." Max said before pulling her into a hug as well.

Sure it would be awkward. I'm hugging my step-dad. I'm hugging my teacher. I'm hugging Max. The correct form would never accumulate in her mind but one day it probably would.

"So, we'll see you tomorrow before we leave." Max said.

"Yeah, we're going to stop by Grandma's before we leave."

"Good, I'll be there."

They all exchanged their goodbyes and when Rory, Emily and Richard left, Lorelai and Max gazed over the empty gazebo that was packed only a few hours ago.

"It's quiet, isn't it?" She asked.

"Yes. Very." He wrapped his arm around her and turned to her smiling.

"Let's go home." She said returning the smile.

_xxxx_

As they pulled into the driveway, Lorelai turned to Max and smiled.

"Hey hubby," she said laughing a bit, "what do you say we leave this stuff in the car and deal with it tomorrow?"

He nodded his head and understood her smile. "I say that's fine with me."

Max got out of the car and quickly walked over to Lorelai's side so that he could open the door for her.

"So is this the part where you carry me up the stairs and deflower me?" She asked laughing.

"Something like that." He held her hand and walked up to the front door and opened it without a key of course because Lorelai never locks the door. Not even if Bono was stuffed inside the house.

"So, tonight." She said raising her eyebrows.

"I'd say it was successful."

"Successful is one way of putting it."

"Amazing is another." He said turning to her and smiling.

As they reached the stairwell, Lorelai averted her eyes towards her room and then back to Max.

"Yes," she leaned in and kissed him lightly, "it was _amazing._"

Wordlessly, they walked up the stairs and shut the door behind them.

As soon as the door shut, Max's mouth lowered onto Lorelai's, not wasting one minute of their time. She walked backwards till she hit the edge of the bed and fell down laughing with Max on top of her. She moved her lips from his mouth to his jaw line and over his neck as he flipped her over and worked on the zipper on her dress. Her eyes roamed around the room, lost in thought with so many things on her mind.

He unzipped the back of her long, beautiful dress and she shimmied her way out of it, the shoulders falling off with no trouble whatsoever.

She looked back up at him, her _husband,_ and smiled.

"I love you." He said looking into her eyes.

She looked down before looking back up and smiling foolishly. "I love you too."

_xxxx  
_

"I'm certainly a fan of the wedding night." Lorelai said resting her head on his chest while he kissed the top of her forehead and laughed.

She laid on top of him; legs tangled together taking in the silence. Lorelai lifted her head up and glanced at the clock.

"It's getting late. We'll never be able to get up tomorrow morning."

"What time is it?" He asked.

"Almost 3:30."

She rested her head flat on his chest again and stared out the window into the darkness. The sound and feeling of his heart beating right near her ear made her stomach toss. She looked back up and kissed his chin.

"Tonight was amazing, really."

"It most certainly was."

"Good. Are you happy?" It was a very obvious answer but she asked him anyways.

"I've never been happier in my life."

She bit her lip and smiled. "Good, I'm glad."

"How about you? Are you happy?"

She glanced out the window before turning her head towards his. "Yes," she said hesitantly, "I'm very happy."

* * *

**The Night Before (August 11th)**

It was cold outside this particular night and driving wasn't an option. Rory had borrowed Lorelai's car for the night, somewhat preventing her from doing some last minute crazy thing but mostly because Paris was borrowing her car for the weekend.

She left her mother alone the night before her wedding. She wanted to give her time to relax and get everything straightened out by herself. She always was the independent one and this time, things were no different.

But she was bored and lonely. She hadn't talked to Max because he was too busy running around, doing last minute fittings for he and his brothers suits. Besides that, he had family to see and things to do.

It was almost ten thirty when her sudden boredom really hit her. She had everything ready and planned out. Now it was all a matter of waiting and hoping for the best outcome. She went over her lists, mentally reminding herself who would be there and who wouldn't be there.

That's when she got up and walked to the front closet, pulling out a pair of shoes and throwing on her sweater before walking out the door.

She took the same familiar walk, thinking about things that were said and done that perhaps weren't necessary to say. Tomorrow is her _wedding._ You want to be in the best mood possible for your wedding but before she had full-fledged happiness, there was one thing she needed to do.

The rest of the way, she planned her apology and knew exactly what she was going to say. She couldn't stay long, perhaps not even for a cup of coffee because she decided getting lots of sleep the night before is a must. She walked up the short stairwell and opened the heavy door, flinching when she heard the bells ring over the diner door.

He looked up and saw her standing in the door way.

"We're closed."

"I know." She said rolling her eyes.

"Which means we're not open for business." He mumbled.

"Listen. I've just had a busy day…and I really need to take it easy for a bit. I thought…well, I thought we could talk."

"I'm busy." He said, scattering threw the receipts on the counter.

"Fine," she sat down on a stool at the counter, "pretend I'm not me. I'm Mimi…new customer. I've never been in here before."

Luke rolled his eyes and poured her the remainder of the coffee left in the pot. After all, it would be stupid to go to waste. And she didn't care about drinking it, she knew she's be up all night anyways, anxious for tomorrow to arrive.

"You know, I'm never really good at this," she mumbled taking a sip of her coffee, "The whole talking thing. I mean, of course I'm good at talking. Verbal is completely my thing but…I'm not good at talking when I _need_ to talk about something. And right now…well, I need to talk about something but you see, my best friend, the one I'm trying to talk to doesn't really want to listen."

"You don't say, Mimi."

"Well, no, I do say," She said laughing pathetically, "I just wish he'd let me speak."

"He'd let you talk." He said without looking up.

"I just wanted to tell him that I'm sorry for saying those things to him about marriage and living with somebody and how not everybody is ready for commitment. I didn't mean to offend him in anyway. He just…made me feel so stupid. He almost convinced me for a split second that I was making a mistake by getting married."

"This best friend of yours sounds like a jerk if you ask me."

She smiled into her cup. "He's not a jerk. He's actually one of the sweetest guys I know behind his monosyllabic-gruff side. He just speaks before he thinks sometimes." She brought her eyes up to his, searching for approval in his eyes.

"Well, I'm sure he'd say he's sorry if he could," she nodded her head and took another sip of her coffee, "and you know…you're not stupid. Getting married is really great for some people."

"Yeah, it is." She stood up from her seat pulling out a dollar out of her pocket.

"Don't worry about it." He said, holding his hand signaling her to put her money back. "It's cold. Did you walk here?"

"Yeah."

"Hey," he gathered up the receipts and put them in a little folder he kept in the back, "what do you say we go upstairs and talk for a little while?"

She grinned. "I don't know. Are new customers allowed to do that?"

Luke laughed, looking down at his feet before staring into her eyes.

"I think we can make an exception for you Mimi."

She smiled and followed the lead up to his apartment.

"So, can I get you a beer or something?" Luke asked as they walked threw the door.

"Uh," she looked around the room and shrugged her shoulders, "yeah that'd be great."

He walked to the fridge and grabbed two bottles of beer before joining Lorelai on the couch. They sat down, pressed against each other and simultaneously opened their beer and took a sip.

"You know, I'm sorry for the things I said to you." Luke said turning to Lorelai. "I didn't mean to make you feel like you were making the wrong decision."

She took another sip of her beer and rested her feet on his coffee table. "I know you didn't, it's okay…don't worry about it."

He nodded his head and smiled. "So, are you ready for tomorrow?"

"What's tomorrow?" She asked smiling.

"You nervous?"

She looked down at her hands, which were busy griping her bottle tight while she played with the label. She was quiet for a few minutes before looking back to him when she realized how close she was to his beautiful blue eyes, which somehow she failed to notice before.

"Yeah," she began, "yeah I am."

"It's normal to be nervous."

"This is true my friend."

"But…you're happy right?" He said gesturing with his hands.

She nodded confidently but was still fixed on his eyes. "I'm happy."

"Well then good." He took another sip of his beer before reaching for the remote and handing it to her. "If there's nothing good on, feel free to look in the third shelf from the bottom." He said pointing to the TV stand.

"Is that where you hide your dirty stuff, Luke?"

"Exactly," he said sarcastically, "no believe it or not, I have had people buy me movies in the past."

"Really?" She asked surprised. "Who?"

"People."

"Well, okay then…" she smiled and got up to look threw his movie collection.

She bent over on the floor and looked in the drawer. Luke watched her as she fumbled threw the probably pathetic movies that he had stored away. He watched the way she propped herself down on her hands and knees, the way her zip-up sweater was casually falling off her left shoulder, the way her hair fell in front of her face…he sighed and took another sip of his beer knowing that if he watched her much longer, he wouldn't only be having friendly feelings for this woman who's getting married tomorrow.

When he admitted that to himself, he rolled his eyes and mumbled something under his breath. She turned her head around and smiled.

"Did you say something?"

"Did you find a movie?" He asked casually.

"Actually I did," she got up from the ground and put the movie in the VCR, "I'm surprised. You actually have a nice little collection Mr. Danes." She grinned and plopped back down on the couch, sitting even closer to him than before.

He rested the remote on her thigh, leaving his hand there for a split second causing her stomach to flutter.

"Should I get the lights?" She asked.

"No I got it."

He got up and turned the lights off completely. He looked over at her and glanced at her _almost_ empty beer bottle.

"You want another?" He asked.

She glanced from the screen over to him. "Sure."

He grabbed two more bottles from the fridge and walked back over to the couch making sure he sat just as close to her as she did to him before. It was almost like a game, a game to see who could sit closer to the other person.

While they watched the movie their minds were both racing on different subjects other than the movie. Chances are, they were both thinking the same and probably _wrong_ thoughts. Lorelai subtly wrapped her foot around the back of Luke's ankle, checking from the corner of her eye if he noticed and it seemed as he did by the facial expression he wore.

She was crossing the line, she thought to herself, she was crossing the line and enjoying the hell out of it. The feeling of Luke sitting so close to her made her feel better than she should but tomorrow, when this whole awkward moment would be over, she'd blame the beer that was currently buzzing threw her body.

Yes, blame the beer.

She turned to face him and stared into his eyes while his eyes were still fixed on the TV.

"Luke." She whispered.

He turned to her, trying not to become too fixed on her beauty because he knew that they were both being irresponsible right now. They shouldn't be there, together, sitting practically on top of each other, undressing each other with their eyes the day before her wedding.

"Luke, have you ever wondered"

He knew he'd have to stop himself. He didn't want her to do something she knew she shouldn't do, despite how much he wanted to answer the question he _knew_ she was going to ask.

"This is a good part, Lorelai."

Her stomach dropped and eyes widened as discretely as possible, trying not to act as though the wind had been knocked out of her.

"Uh, yeah, right, sorry." She turned back to the movie and removed her foot from around Luke's.

The second that Luke felt her foot move over he knew he lost his shot, no matter how wrong the shot would be. Despite how wrong it was, he wanted her and she knew it.

Or maybe after all, it was just the beer. Yes, the beer, he kept reminding himself as he came close to finishing his second bottle.

He did the same thing with his foot as she did too his. It was almost childish, playing a fake game of footsie but it made Luke _giddy,_ and not a lot of things can make him giddy.

She reached on the other side of her lap and grabbed the remote, quickly turning the TV off and getting up to go turn the lights on.

"Let's play a game." She said getting two _more_ bottles of beer.

"Uh, a what?"

"Game, Luke. Let's play…" she thought for a second before throwing her head back and clapping with laughter, "let's play truth or dare."

Luke swallowed hard and looked up at her surprised. "Truth or…"

"I pick truth."

"I wasn't asking."

"Yes, but I was telling."

"Lorelai, I don't think we should play…"

"Luke. We need to have a little fun for a change. We never have fun…together at least. And, I want to enjoy my last day of being a single woman."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He asked suddenly getting curious.

"Whatever you want it to mean." She smiled and sat down on the floor across the table.

"So, you want to ask first or should I?"

"Uh well, you see"

"Perfect." She opened her bottle and took a sip. She wasn't drunk, really, tipsy though. She had a high tolerance for beer so there was a good chance she'd remember just about everything in the morning. "Truth or dare?"

"Lorelai, honestly"

"Just pick Luke." she said pouting. There was absolutely no way that he could resist the Lorelai pout. "For me?"

"Truth." He spat out.

"Who was the girl you lost your virginity with and when?" She asked quickly.

"Shouldn't we start with something simpler? Like…who my first girlfriend was?"

"We could." She said smiling seductively. "But that's not what I want to know."

"Well then in that case…it was with a girl named Kate. We were seniors and we had been dating for a while."

"What was it like?" She asked leaning her head to the side.

"You already got your turn. It's mine now."

"Fine." She mumbled. "I pick truth."

He thought for a few minutes. He didn't want to ask her something about her past because he already knew a few of those answers, obviously having to do something with Christopher and he really had no desire to hear about that. Then there was Max. He could ask her something about Max, but he didn't want to put her on the spot.

"Are you honestly happy?"

But he winded up doing it anyways. At least he tried to make it subtle instead of flat out asking if she was glad she was marrying him.

She looked around the room, searching for the answers hidden on the wall, or underneath the newspaper on the coffee table but she knew she wouldn't find any of the answers there.

"You know, I used to think that Christopher and I would one day get married and live somewhere hidden off, away from my parents and his, but then I turned 17 and ran away…to Stars Hollow."

"Okay…"

"I'm glad that I didn't do that with him though. I am honestly happy and I didn't need an abandon place or no parents to make me happy."

He nodded his head and slid down from the couch down to the floor sitting across from her.

"Good enough answer?" She asked.

"Yeah it worked."

"Good. So. Truth or dare?"

"Truth again."

"You're quite the risk taker aren't you?"

"That's one way of putting it."

"So," she started, eager to ask him the question, "what was the real reason that Rachel left?"

As soon as the question stumbled out of her mouth, he looked down afraid to look back into her eyes. _Truth…or lie,_ he asked himself. _The game is truth or dare, not answer truthfully only if you want to. But she won't know if I'm lying, would she?_

Oh yes she would.

Or maybe that's just because Luke isn't the world's best liar.

At least on the spot.

"Uh, well…truthfully?" What a stupid question to ask he told himself.

"Hence the title of the game."

Yep. She's good.

"She left because she thought that…I have feelings for you." He said taking a sip of his beer.

"Oh." She felt stupid. She could have _probably_ figured that out if she tried, but her mind didn't think like that. Not around Luke. But for the past hour or so, that's the only way her mind was thinking. About Luke in a more than friendly way. _The beer,_ she reminded herself. _The beer._

"And…I mean…did you—was it…was it true?"

"You only get to ask one question at a time." He reminded her, mentally saving his ass.

"Right." She nodded her head slowly.

They were both quiet a minute longer, the two of them trying to figure out what to say next. "So, truth or dare?" Luke figured that was the best thing to say. He didn't necessarily _want_ to stop playing; he was actually having fun and still had some questions he wanted to ask.

"Truth."

"Are you in love with Max?"

_Of course,_ she thought to herself right away though she didn't say it out loud. She _is_ only marrying the guy in less than 24 hours. Of course she's in love with him. _Of course_, she repeats over and over again, _I love the guy I'm marrying after I leave this incredibly friendly night with Luke and go to sleep and wake up in the morning. That is when I'm marrying him and I love the man I'm marrying._

Good. As long as she got that squared away.

She nodded her head, accomplished, before realizing she never said her answer out loud.

"Yes. I'm in love."

_There's no sense in asking her these questions,_ he thought to himself. _Of course she's in love with him…or else she wouldn't be marrying him in less than 24 hours._

As long as he'd keep repeating that to himself and that they were both a little tipsy everything would be okay.

"Truth or dare?" She asked him.

"I pick dare."

"Really? Dare?"

"Really." He confirmed.

"Alright, let's see." Be responsible, she tells herself. Don't make yourself sound like an idiot. "I dare you to hold your breathe for 45 seconds." _What?_ She asked herself once the words flew out of her mouth.

"Uh, okay?"

She was just as awkward about it as he was. She wasn't sure where that came from. She guessed it was just her lame example of trying not to make herself sound like she's trying-trying.

He held his breath for 45 seconds and when released his breath mumbled, "That was weird."

"Uh, yeah…your turn."

"Truth or dare?"

"Truth." She said forwardly.

"Why do you come to the diner everyday?" He asked her quickly.

"The coffee of course." She said, winking.

He wanted to believe that was all. Hell, he did believe that was all. But a little part of him hoped she'd extend on it more.

"And to see you." She added.

"Yeah?"

"Of course, Luke. You know, you really underestimate yourself. You'd be surprised of how great of a friend I think you are."

He smiled and nodded, satisfied with her answer.

"Your turn again."

"Truth or dare?" She asked.

"Truth."

"Hmm…let me think." She thought for a second before a wide smile spread across her face. "Are you ready for me?"

"Shoot."

"What sound do you, Luke Danes make during…sexual activity with that lucky lady."

"What _sounds_ do I make?" He asked surprised.

"Yes, show them off to me, baby!" She said laughing.

"You have _got_ to be kidding me."

"No kidding at all." She said smiling.

"I don't _make_ noises, Lorelai."

"Oh come on, of course you do."

"No, I really don't."

"Boohoo. You're no fun."

"Sorry. My turn." He said grinning because he knew he pissed her off with his half-ass answer.

"Truth or dare." He asked her.

"Truth."

"Alright…" he thought for a second before he came up with something to ask, "do you know something about me that I don't know?" He asked.

She was confused but thought about his question and when she came up with the answer, was rather satisfied even though she knew he knew. He just didn't know _she_ knew.

"I know something you've known for a while now." She said grinning. "At least I think I do."

"What is it?" He asked.

"Remember Luke," she smiled, "you only get to as one question at a time. My turn."

"Truth." He answered her before she could ask the options.

"What has been the hardest thing in life for you?" She asked. He could say watching her get married was going to be tough, but that probably wasn't the hardest thing. He could take the normal route and that's what he chose to do so.

"Losing my parents. It was really hard on all of us when my mom died. My dad really loved her. So did Liz and I but…he had been with her for years. And when my dad died…I felt like I had nobody. Liz left and I was left alone to figure out things on my own. It was a pretty tough time in my life." He ended quietly.

Lorelai frowned to herself, feeling grateful for her parents no matter how many times she wished they would just disappear.

"I'm sorry Luke." She said.

"Hey, it was a while ago." They were both quiet for a second. "So, truth or dare?"

She grinned suspiciously. "Dare."

"Dare, huh?"

"Yep." She nodded confidently.

Let's not make this a 45-second holding of the breath process, he thought to himself. "You have two options…either…call Miss Patty or pretend to be Taylor…"

"Yeah right! It's past 11!"

"Or…" What the hell was he supposed to ask her?

"Or…drink a cup of apple juice with a spoon." _What?_ He asked himself.

Stupid, stupid mind. Clearly this game was way too much for them.

"Drink apple juice with a spoon?" Her mind went straight to the gutter and assumed it was suppose to turn him on in someway. "My pleasure." She said getting up.

She went into his kitchen, surprised that he even had apple juice. She poured herself a cup and went into his drawer to get a spoon. She walked back to the floor and sat in the same position before bring a spoonful of…apple juice to her mouth and drinking it slow and seductively, running her tongue across the spoon. Her eyes were fixed on his the whole time while he was intensely watching her lips.

She took the spoon out of her mouth and took a real sip of the drink.

"Truth or dare?" She asked him.

"Dare." He says boldly.

"Okay. You get two options." She took a very long sip of beer before setting it on the table and crawling over to Luke. She rested her arm on his thigh and looked him into his eyes.

"Either you have to go run around the square…_naked_..."

"Lorelai there's NO way that I'm going to do that." He said shaking his head.

"Or…I want—I _dare_ you to kiss me." She said quietly, looking down at her hand on his thigh, mentally bashing her head into a wall. What was she trying to get herself _into?_ Bad, bad Lorelai. Bad. Very, very bad.

His eyes widened. "You want…dare me…to…what?" He was one-hundred percent convinced that he heard her wrong.

"Kiss me." She repeated, just as quiet and just as shy.

"Lorelai, I'm _not _running threw the square naked."

"Then you have your other option." She said quickly.

"Lorelai…you don't want me to kiss you." He said quickly. He knew that if he'd kiss her, he couldn't guarantee he'd be able to stop.

"It's just a game Luke." She said looking up at him.

"I know but you're getting"

"It's _just_ a game." She cut him off because she knew if she heard the rest of his sentence, she'd know how correct he was and how wrong and horrible she was being.

"I…"

"Don't worry." She said slowly, leaning her body into his even slower.

"I don't think" He whispered.

"Don't think." She lifted her hand up and placed it around the back of his neck, very, very slowly pulling his mouth towards hers. She knew it was his dare. And it was wrong. But he wasn't moving quickly enough with her and she wanted him. Badly.

And now.

_Ring, ring._

"Fuck." She mumbled under her breath. Luke felt her breath over his lips and both cursed and thanked whoever the hell was calling.

She closed her eyes and sighed before reaching into her purse next to her. She pulled out her cell phone and saw that Sookie was calling.

"Hello?"

"Hey Lorelai!"

"Hey Sook, uh…listen," she looked into Luke's eyes who were fiercely gazing into hers, "can I call you back in a little bit? I'm in the middle of something."

"Sure, no problem sweetie."

"Thanks Sookie, I'll call you later."

She pressed end and before she could put her cell phone down, Luke's lips crashed on top of hers. She freely opened her mouth, quickly allowing him to deepen the kiss. He pushed her back against the table and leaned into her body, wrapping his arm around her back, supporting her against the probably uncomfortable table.

She lifted her hands up and knocked Luke's hat off his head as he lowered his hands towards the hem of her sweatshirts, his fingers slowly moving across her bare back, casually moving up higher and higher.

She pulled away from him quickly, breathing heavily and unzipped her swear, relieving her in just her tank top.

She pressed her lips hard against his, this time pushing him against the couch and leaning into his body. She sat on her knees both between his legs which were spread open slightly. He moved his fingers to the bottom of her shirt again, as she moved her mouth to his ear, sucking lightly before moving her mouth to his neck where she placed many kisses. The smell of Luke as she kissed his neck made her head dizzy. He smells so good, she thought to herself.

He lifted one of his hands to her neck and adjusted her face to look at him. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Lorelai grabbed his hands and pulled him up from the floor, kissing him fiercely yet again. She walked backwards until he was eventually lying on the couch completely. She came down with him, lying on top of him, legs intertwined as he caressed her back.

Everything was moving quickly. She knew as much as she was enjoying this (where _did_ Luke learn how to kiss?) it was probably the most wrong thing to be doing. She wouldn't regret it though. If there was one thing she had learned in her life thus far, it was to never regret things cause after all, _everything happens for a reason._

She didn't want to think about Max, or getting married, or tomorrow. She wanted to think about the way Luke's hands felt on her body and the way Luke's mouth felt on hers. As long as she was in the act, she was going to enjoy it no matter how horrible it sounded. Because right now, if there was one thing she wanted most, it would be to _be with_ Luke.

She wasn't the only one feeling somewhat guilty. He knew it was wrong, and that he shouldn't have put her in this position. He should have turned her down instead of practically shoving himself in her face but clearly, she didn't mind. At least right now she didn't. Right now she was willingly lifting herself off of his body so he could take her tank off. He tossed it somewhere, they'd find it later.

He knew she must be cold. The air was on in his apartment and the vent was right next to the couch. He caressed her sides up and down for a few minutes while she arranged herself back on his body. She moaned into his mouth, the feeling (the simplest feeling in the world, though being preformed by a man of such wonders) made her body shudder.

"That feels nice." She said before pulling away from his mouth, but keeping her lips close to his, eyes closed as her forehead pressed against his.

"Let's move to the" She mumbled against his mouth.

"Lorelai, are you sure you want to do this?"

"Shh." She kissed him a few times before lifting herself off of his body, standing up and holding her hands out towards Luke who was sprawled on the couch.

She offered her hands and he accepted as he stood up and pressed his mouth against hers as they walked backwards towards the bed. Lorelai began taking off his flannel shirt and the both of them broke apart—just for a second—while Luke slid his tee-shirt over his head and threw it on the floor. He pulled her body against his as he lowered her onto the bed, the feeling of their bare stomachs feeling different and amazing at the same time. He gently pushed her back against his pillows and leaned over her body, kissing her passionately one more time before breaking away and moving his hands down to her waist, removing her jeans quickly.

She didn't want to face the truth that right now, she was going to make love to another man. But it wasn't _just_ another man. This was Luke. And this wasn't a last minute before I get married sort of thing.

It wasn't like a typical bachelorette party where perhaps you have a stripper and may mess around with him for a bit. That was nothing like this. This was breaking their sexual attraction and tension that had been there since day one. This was him finally getting to be with her and this was her finally getting to experience _Luke._

_xxxx_

And so stands still the expression that friends make the best lovers.

They hadn't spoken much, except for mumbling things to each other, laughing occasionally and kissing each other on certain spots of their body that they had already discovered they had loved.

She turned over and looked at the clock. She should go. It was very late. But there was no way she could leave him right now.

"You tired?" He mumbled into her ear.

"Yeah, I'm getting there. You?"

"I've been up 20 hours."

She turned her body so she was facing away from him, allowing him to wrap his body around hers and kiss her on the back of her neck.

"Go to sleep." She said quietly.

"Are you going to sleep here with me?" He asked, almost in a desperate, hopeful voice.

"I'm not leaving." She strained her neck to turn around and look into his eyes. "Goodnight Luke." She kissed him long and slow before turning her head back into the right position.

"Goodnight Lorelai." He whispered into her ear before closing his eyes to drift off into the most peaceful night of sleep ever.

She only stayed up a few minutes longer. She didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to face the truth and admit to herself just _how_ amazing that was. It was almost too good for words. It was a once in a lifetime feeling that only one guy could give her and she hadn't known about it until just nearly a half an hour ago. And the sad thing was…her fiancé wasn't the one who made her feel that way.

She'd figure everything out tomorrow. Tonight, she was going to get some sleep just like Luke who was already sleeping because she could feel his breath against her shoulder.

She glanced at the clock one last time before closing her eyes and drifting off herself.

_xxxx_

It wasn't an alarm, or the comforting feeling of Luke's arm still wrapped around her waist that woke her up. It was the sun light burning her bare skin that did the trick. She opened her eyes, squinting from the sunlight. She turned her head around to see if Luke was awake but he was sound asleep. She looked over at the clock that read 5:55.

This was going to be hard. Very hard. But it was something she had to do and she had to do it quickly, before she didn't do it at all.

She crept out of bed as sly as possible, getting dressed in her clothes from last night. She walked over to the kitchen, grabbing a piece of paper and a pen, scribbling down a note before she opened the door and quietly left.

_xxxx_

It wasn't the sunlight that woke him up 2 hours later though. It was the fact that his arm wasn't around Lorelai. He got up quickly and glanced at the bathroom door which was wide open. He looked on the floor and saw her clothes missing. He knew she was gone. And he was pissed.

He cursed and sighed as he laid his head back down.

Over 20 minutes later he got up and walked over to the kitchen when a note on the counter caught his eye. He picked up the piece of paper and read it to himself.

_There is one thing that can stop me.  
__-Lorelai._

He read the letter over 10 times before placing it back down on the counter and walking over to the table to sit down. After re-reading it those 10 times, he discovered nothing he didn't see before with the exception of the scribbled heart next to her name.

He rested his head on the table and sighed.

* * *

"Lorelai, wake up." Max said, kissing her cheek in attempt to wake her up.

"Max?"

"Yeah. Come on, get up. It's almost 12."

"Oh my god, how did we sleep this late?" She shot up in bed and glanced at the clock to make sure he was telling the truth—which…he was.

"We were up late last night." He said laughing before turning to her and kissing her softly.

"Good morning."

She smiled and nodded her head. "Good morning."

"We should get up." He said pulling her back down in bed with him.

"Yes, we should. We've got to hit the road soon. My parents are expecting us at their house around 1:30-2 to say goodbye."

"We'll get ready soon." He said kissing her forehead.

"Yes, we'll get ready soon." She said quietly.

He looked over at her and noticed her eyes gazing at the ceiling.

"Hey are you okay?" He asked concerned.

She took a minute before answering. "Yes." She sighed, resting her hands on her stomach. "Everything is fine."

* * *

_TBC_

_Hopefully we'll have the next chapter up soon. Leave a review and it'll come quicker!_


	2. Moving On

**Who Lies Beneath**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, so therefore don't sue me. Gilmore girls belongs to ASP and the WB.

**Summary: **LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistake before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

**Authors Note: **Okay, so wow! First off thank you guys SO much for the fabulous feedback! That was definitely record-breaking reviews right there! ;) We're really glad that you guys like the story as much as you do! Sorry that it took forever for the update. It took me a while to get started on this chapter but here it finally is, and to quote Annick, "tissies are a must." We hope the next chapter will be up much quicker than this one! So please read and review:)

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 2: Moving On**

It was close to one o'clock by the time they got everything loaded in the car and ready to go. The weather was great for traveling and great for pleasure. Hopefully the weather would be nice in California where they were headed. It was an unusual place for them to be headed but they had a few places they wanted to see in mind. Another part on the more unfortunate side was that Max had a little bit of work he had to do in California. He didn't know he had to until after their wedding was set in stone one hundred percent. So their options were to hold off the honeymoon for about two weeks and go somewhere else or go to California for two weeks and Lorelai liked the going idea more. She had no objections against California whatsoever; as a matter of fact she was more than excited.

"So you're positive you have everything you need?" Max asked yet again.

"I'm _positive,_ and a little irritated to tell you the truth."

"Why are you irritated?" He asked laughing.

"Because you've probably asked me if I have everything I need at least 13 times already."

"So, you're positive you have everything you need?" He said jokingly before getting into the car.

"Drive already." She mumbled. "So, how great is it that we get to say goodbye to my parents for two whole weeks?"

"Well it's not like you see them much anyways. Except for Friday night dinners."

"Which you will now be attending." She said with a wicked laugh.

"And I'm highly looking forward to them as a matter of fact." He said in all seriousness.

"You what?"

"I mean, I'm interested to see what goes on, you only talk about them all the time."

"They treat me like hell, that's what goes on. And if you don't believe me now," she laughed pathetically, "you just wait."

"I guess I'll have to."

Not even 5 minutes into their drive, Lorelai cursed under her breath.

"What's the matter?" Max asked.

"I forgot my coffee at home." She said pouting.

He sighed and gave her an 'I told you so' kind of look. He looked in his mirror to make sure it was safe to turn but Lorelai quickly asked, "What are you doing? You can just go straight and turn left at the corner to get back to the house."

"I know I was just going to go to Luke's instead. You can grab a cup before we leave."

_Luke._ The name alone scared her half to death. She made sure her cheeks weren't red with nervousness (and a little bit of embarrassment) when he said his name. There was no way she could go to _the diner._ Especially if Luke is there. Sure she'd have to face him sometime soon but not now, not today, and probably not for a few weeks. She just couldn't face him. And she knew that he couldn't face her. After all, he didn't even show up at the wedding, no matter how much damage he could have or would have done.

"You know what?" She put her hands on the wheels and tried to get him to go straight. "I'm fine. I'll just get coffee at my parent's."

He turned and looked at her to make sure she was fine without her coffee. "You're positive?"

"Definitely. After all, we might as well start that whole good punctuality thing sooner huh?" She laughed nervously.

"All right then, let's go."

The whole ride to the elder Gilmore's, Lorelai's mind was racing with thoughts about Luke. She couldn't concentrate on anything else but him and why he didn't show up. Even if he wasn't there to stop her, he could have at least shown up instead of wallowing in his own sorrow. _Wait,_ she thought to herself, _how do I know he's wallowing in his own sorrow? How do I even know he cares at all that I got married?_ She wondered if he even cared in the first place—about the night they shared. _He had too;_ she convinced herself, remembering the little touches and stares that were shared during the night. _He couldn't not care,_ she realized that if there was any way she could get over it—this thing with her and Luke—she'd have to act as if there was nothing to care about. _Perfect, pretend he doesn't care and pretend you don't care either._

That wasn't going to work.

They both cared _too_ much and that was the problem.

"Lorelai? Are you listening?" Max asked, tapping her on the leg.

"Huh, what? Sorry." She said snapping out of it and looking over at Max.

"You okay?" He asked when he noticed how flustered and confused she looked.

"Yeah I'm fine, sorry. What were you saying?"

"Do I turn left here?"

"Oh, uh," she looked around the streets, amazed that they were already almost at their house, "yeah, left here."

They pulled up to the Gilmore mansion and got out of the car, walking towards the door.

"So remember, quick and down to the point." She said pointing to Max.

"Got it."

Lorelai rung the doorbell and turned towards Max.

"Come here, you."

She leaned in and gave him a quick kiss before the maid opened the door.

"Hi, I'm here to see my parents." Lorelai said walking in. It was a new maid she didn't recognize so she figured she wouldn't recognize them either.

"They're straight in the back ma'am." The maid took their coats before the headed towards the back holding hands.

"She called me ma'am." Lorelai whispered into Max's ear. "I hate when people call me ma'am."

"She's just being polite." He suggested.

"Fine, but she makes me feel old. I don't like feeling old."

"We all know you're not old."

"Was that supposed to be dirty?" She said louder than intended as she walked into the living room where Emily, Richard and Rory were staring at them.

"Oh. Hi guys." Lorelai said laughing.

Emily rolled her eyes and sighed before getting up. "There they are!" She said with a kick of an enthusiasm.

"Emily, it's nice to see you." Max said returning the hug that Emily willingly gave him. Lorelai exchanged confused faces with both Max and Rory.

"Max how are you doing?" Richard said getting up from the couch and shaking his hand.

"Great thanks. How are you all?"

"We're great Max." Emily said happily. "We're just so excited to have Rory all to ourselves for two whole weeks."

Lorelai rolled her eyes and laughed. "You know, funniest thing mom, Rory was just telling me she almost couldn't breathe she was so excited."

"Was that supposed to be funny, Lorelai? The image of your daughter not being able to breathe?" Emily asked in all seriousness.

Lorelai couldn't help but laugh. "Wait, you're uh- you're serious aren't you?"

"No, I'm just seeing if you like my act I plan on using at the comedy club next week. Yes I'm serious."

"Sorry." Lorelai said before closing her mouth and pretending to zip it shut.

They all sat down together, talking about the wedding and the events that happened there. They all agreed they had a great time, Max and Lorelai especially, the both of them silently agreeing the events _after_ the wedding we're great too. They told them their plans in California, Emily making sure to give them a list of places to go which Lorelai mentally reminded herself to throw out by the front door garbage oppose to the one in the kitchen.

Emily watched the couple the whole time. She watched how they held hands, how they sat close to each other, how happy Max looked and how occupied her daughter looked. She couldn't help but realize that Lorelai looked a little out of it—sort of like something was on her mind. She could tell she wasn't concentrating so much on Max's ramble about what kind of work he has to do in California. She watched Lorelai from the corner of her eye the whole rest of the time, keeping in mind possible things that could have her so occupied.

She really came up with nothing.

They look like a married couple though, she agreed to herself. They look happy despise what's on Lorelai's mind.

When Lorelai finally snapped out of it and tuned into what part Max was at in his babble, she looked at the wrist on his watch and gasped.

"We have to go."

"One second Lorelai, Max is in the middle of telling me something."

Max looked down at his watch before gasping himself.

"Actually, I hate to have to end here but we're going to be late if we don't leave now."

"Oh well then alright," Richard got up from his seat and walked over to them, "have an excellent time and make sure you go to those places we wrote down for you." He reminded them.

"We will, dad."

While Max said goodbye to Emily and Richard, Lorelai walked over to Rory and gave her a sad smile.

"I'll miss you kid." She said hugging her. "If you feel the need to run…I understand. Just, call me before you do it so I don't get a call from my mother telling me you ran away. I don't like surprises."

Rory laughed. "I won't run away. But if I do, I'll make sure to call you."

"Good." She pulled away and gave her a kiss on her cheek. "You'll think about me?" Lorelai asked pouting.

"I think I can do that. Have fun!"

"We will!"

"Bye mom."

"Bye, kid. I love you." She gave her one last hug, never really liking goodbyes.

"Love you too."

Almost simultaneously, Max walked over to Rory as Lorelai walked over to her parents.

"So, you'll take care of her right?" Rory asked Max.

"I'll try."

"Good. Cause you know, she's a lot to handle on her own."

"Yes, she is." He agreed. "Have fun with your grandparents."

"I will. And have fun in California. Make sure you guys bring me back something good." She said smiling.

"We definitely will. I'm sure your mom already has a list of things she wants to get you."

"Good. Encourage her to take it into consideration."

"I will." He said laughing before giving her a hug.

"Have a good time, Max."

They all said their last goodbyes and finally got out of the door and into the car.

"Man, I thought we'd never leave."

"Good thing you noticed it was getting late or else we would have been late for our flight."

"Well what can I say, punctuality is my strong point." She said winking as he pulled out of the driveway.

_x-x-x-x-x_

They weren't late to the airport. In fact they were a little early so Lorelai went to the coffee stand in the airport to get her and Max both a cup while he checked them in with the hostess near their terminal. Because of the nice weather, they were due for boarding in about a half an hour so they still had time to mingle.

She walked up to the coffee cart with her head stuck in her purse searching for her wallet.

"Two coffee's to go…" she looked up and her eyes widened when she saw the guy behind the coffee cart, "…please." Wow. She rubbed her eyes with the thought that possibly she was just a little sleepy and envisioning things. Nope, that didn't work.

"Here you go." He said handing her the cups of coffee which almost made her mouth drop. Not only did he look like him but he sounded a little bit like him too.

The attire was different, but nonetheless it looked like a spitting image of him. The eyes, the hair, even the mouth. Scary that she knew what his mouth looked like but it didn't stop her from noticing the resemblance.

"Uh, sorry," she said taking the cups, "thanks a lot." She walked away as quick as she could but turned around one last time before he was out of sight.

She walked up to Max who was reading a book he had in his carry on bag.

"There you are," she said sitting next to him, "this is for you." She handed him his coffee.

"Thanks. Find it okay?"

"Yeah, no problems at all."

"Great, well we're all checked in and we're due to board the plane in about 30 minutes so if you need to go to the bathroom or make a phone call or something, feel free to do that now."

"I'm fine for now." She said slumping back into her chair. "I'm just a little tired right now." She leaned against his shoulder and closed her eyes tightly for a few minutes. He glanced down at her and noticed her tense face.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and leaned down to ask her a question. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." She said closing her eyes.

Max noticed something a little different about her. He knew she was happy but it just seemed like something was bugging her. Maybe she really just was tired after all.

Thirty minutes later, Max shook Lorelai awake.

"Come on Lorelai, they're boarding our section now."

Lorelai opened her eyes and looked around confused. "Already?"

"You've been sleeping for the past half hour." He said laughing.

"Oh, yeah." She looked around the airport, still a little groggy from waking up. "I was."

_x-x-x-x-x_

When the flight finally began Lorelai felt a little sick. She slept for a few hours but right as she woke up Max asked her if she was okay. She barked at him (for caring) a little more than she should have. Wasn't this supposed to be the honeymoon stage? She apologized later during the flight and cuddled against him, trying to fall back asleep.

_x-x-x-x-x_

"Finally we're here!" Lorelai dropped her bags on the floor as Max lugged the rest into the room. "I thought we'd never make it!"

"Here we are." He dropped the rest of the bags and walked around the room with Lorelai checking everything out.

She went into the bedroom and plopped down onto the bed, closing her eyes for a second. "That plane ride was brutal."

"That's one way of putting it." He laid on the bed next to her. "Are you feeling better now?"

Lorelai rolled over and kissed him on his cheek. "Much better. Sorry again for going off on you, I didn't mean to yell."

"That's okay. Don't worry about it. You didn't look to good on the plane anyways."

"Are you calling me ugly?" Lorelai asked pretending to be mad.

"Yes that's _exactly_ what I'm doing." She hit him playfully and pinned herself over his body holding his wrists down against the bed.

"Say your sorry!" She yelled.

He pretended to be in pain before leaning up and kissing her.

"Hungry?"

"Mmm hmm." She mumbled against his lips.

"Perfect. We already have reservations for dinner so go get ready."

"When did you make reservations?"

"I told you it wasn't already planned." He said smiling as he got off the bed to change. She followed him into the bathroom.

"What should I wear?"

"Nothing too fancy."

"Max, seriously." She said rolling her eyes.

"What?"

"How could you _possibly_ think that's enough information?"

"About what you should wear?" He asked.

She sighed loudly and walked out of the bathroom. "Black or red?" She screamed into the bathroom.

He figured it was better if he just went along with whatever she was asking.

"Black." He shouted back.

_x-x-x-x-x_

It wasn't until 8 that they showed up for their reservation. Max made sure to make it later in the evening because there flight was certainly a long one. It was a quiet little Italian restaurant. There was a piano player and vocalist in the back playing music. Lorelai's eyes shot over to the dance floor while they took there seats at the table.

"Thank you." Max said to the hostesses. She nodded her head and walked away. Max sat down and realized Lorelai was still standing watching the couples dance.

"Lorelai? Are you going to sit down?"

"Sorry." She said looking at her seat. "Actually, come on." She grabbed him out of his seat and pulled him to the dance floor. "Dance with me."

He wasn't going to object. He knew she loved dancing and he loved dancing with her. She took him to the center before wrapping her arms around him, adjusting herself perfectly.

They softly swayed to the music. Lorelai rested her face near his neck and closed her eyes at one point, enjoying the relaxing dance.

"We didn't dance enough last night." She commented.

"I'm sorry. There was a lot going on."

"It's fine, I'm just saying."

"Well close your eyes and pretend it's our wedding." He said quietly.

Lorelai closed her eyes but couldn't imagine the wedding. "Yeah," she said softly, "our wedding."

As the song came to an end, they walked back to their table and ordered their dinner. They sat there discussing the wedding and how well they thought it went over.

"She was smashed!" Lorelai said laughing.

"I know, I heard her ask the bartender if he'd take her home and make love to her all night."

Lorelai chocked on her wine, laughing. "That's Patty for you."

"Babette wasn't too far behind her either."

"Yes but she had Morey to control her."

"He wasn't too far behind Patty either."

"What can we say? We kill thrower weddings." Lorelai said winking.

"So, you had a great time?"

"I had a _wonderful_ time." Even though Luke was on her mind a lot of the night, she still had more than an amazing time at their wedding. Despite how guilty she felt.

"And how about you? I saw you flirting with Kate from the flower shop."

"Yes that was exactly what I was doing. Flirting when my wife was right next to me watching my every mood." He said smiling.

His words stung her stomach as she innocently smiled. "Man, I'm going to have to get used to that." She said sighing.

"What?"

"Being called a wife, it just sounds so different to me."

"I hadn't thought so."

"Hey, don't mock me mister."

"I'm not mocking you." He said hiding his laughter.

She leaned across the table and held onto his hand for a second before their waiter came.

The enjoyed the rest of the dinner while they talked about plans for the rest of their honeymoon and what was next on their list of things to do. They danced one more time before leaving and going back to their hotel.

"I never thought I'd like the big city." She said as they walked into the bedroom.

"So what's the verdict?"

"Well…from the 4 hours we've been here I'd say I love it already."

"I'm glad to hear it." He took off his shirt and looked around the room for one of his night shirts.

"Oh no, no Max." Lorelai said smiling seductively.

"What?"

"Remember I asked you black or red?"

"Yeah, I said black but you wore a purple dress."

"Right." She said slipping the dress off in one swift movement.

"Oh, I get it." He said grinning while she walked over to him.

_x-x-x-x-x_

The next morning Max woke Lorelai up with breakfast in bed.

"Wow." She said as she got up and looked around the room. "Nobody has done something quite this movie-like before."

"You like?" He said gesturing to the setup.

"You bet I do." She took a big sip of coffee. "So what's on the agenda for today?"

"Well, I know you want to go shop…" he started but paused when he says Lorelai grinning and nodding her head like a crazy person. "So I thought we could get lunch around town and go shopping a little later. I have to get a few things and I know you can get plenty of things. But the thing is…we're going to have to go soon because I've got something planned for later."

"Sounds devious." She said raising an eyebrow.

"Well I'm going in the shower. Eat your breakfast and when you're ready, let me know."

"Ok, thanks babe." She said smiling.

_x-x-x-x-x_

It was late afternoon when they finished up with their shopping which was extremely successful. They were on their way to wherever it was Max was taking her. It wasn't exactly supposed to be a surprise since really it was no big deal but somehow he turned into one because he liked annoyed Lorelai.

"Are we almost there?" She whined.

"We'll be there in about 5 minutes." He said calmly.

"No really, where are you taking me?"

"You really can't wait 5 more minutes? You've waited all afternoon."

"I guess…"she mumbled. "Just drive a little faster will you?"

"You know, my intention isn't to bring you down right now but this wasn't going to be a surprise. Somehow it just turned into one."

"Oh." She said lamely.

"That doesn't mean I hope you won't like it though. I know where I'm taking you doesn't scream Lorelai but…" he turned into the parking lot and they looked straight ahead in front of them.

"…I could see why taking to me to a grape field doesn't scream Lorelai?" She raised the end of it into a question.

"A vineyard. California's home for vineyards."

"What do we do here? Pick grapes?"

"Actually we're going to have a wine tasting."

"Oh like on TV?" She asked excitedly.

"I guess. I'm not sure what you've seen on TV."

"Where we get to step in the grapes and make wine and drink tons and tons of wine till we get drunk off our asses and can't walk?"

Max laughed. "That's one way of putting it, although I don't know if they're goal here at the vineyard is to get us uncharacteristically drunk."

"Well what are we waiting for?" She said taking off her seat belt. "Let's go!"

There guide, Lynn, was a great help. When she wasn't listening, Lorelai would whisper in Max's ear to stop flirting. They walked threw the vineyard, made wine like Lorelai thought they would, and drank more than Max imagined. They had dozens of different tastes of wine, all in which they enjoyed more and more as they kept coming.

"This is my favorite." Lorelai said taking a sip.

"You say that about every glass you try." Max pointed out.

"Have not."

"I have to agree with Max on this." Lynn said laughing. "I actually have a list of your favorite's right here." She said hanging Lorelai a small sheet of paper.

"We'll have to take a few bottles back to the hotel." Max commented.

"Are you guys from California?" She asked.

"Actually not at all. We're from Connecticut."

"So what brings you to California?"

"We're on our honeymoon actually." Lorelai said smiling.

"Oh! When was your wedding?" She said excitedly.

"Just two days ago actually."

"Wow, very newlyweds!"

"We are at that."

"How long are you guys in California for?"

"Two weeks. Unfortunately I have to work a bit while we're up here so we're staying a few extra days."

"Well then…I'll be right back." Lynn walked away from their table into the back.

Max and Lorelai both exchanged a 'she's so nice' to each other just before she returned baring 3 bottles of wine.

"Since you guys are newlyweds and here for what seems to be your first time from the impression Lorelai gave me when she was making the wine…"

Lorelai laughed. "Yes, it's our time first."

"Well then here, these are for you."

"Oh no Lynn, that's too much!" Lorelai said trying to get Lynn to take them back. "How much can I give you?"

"No, there from us here at the vineyard to you guys."

"You're too kind. Thank you so much for everything." They both got up out of their seats. Lorelai gave Lynn a hug goodbye as did Max.

"It's been great, really." Max added.

"Well enjoy the rest of your stay. You guys were a pleasure."

"We will. Thanks again for everything."

They left the vineyard and drove back to their hotel. It wasn't until about 7 that they got back to their hotel both completely exhausted and even a little tipsy.

"So are you hungry?" Max asked opening the door to their suite.

"Not at all right now. Are you?"

"Not right now."

"Do you want to watch a movie or something? They've got a lot of choices on TV."

"Sounds good to me." Max walked over to the fridge and pulled out two bottles of water. "So we'll just stay in for the night?"

"I thought so." She said grabbing one of the bottles from him.

"Alright well if you want you can go get changed out of your clothes."

"Perfect. I'll be back soon."

They spent the rest of the night in watching movies on TV. It took them over 20 minutes to decide what to watch because there were too many great ones to choose from. They both went to bed a little bit early, ready for yet another day like this tomorrow and more days to come.

_x-x-x-x-x_

Unfortunately the next two days were spent in the hotel and really only the hotel. Lorelai had come down with something and wasn't feeling very good. Perhaps it was because Max wouldn't let her drink coffee or maybe it was really because she had fever. Whichever it was, she hated it and wished to be better. This wasn't how their honeymoon was supposed to go.

"Can I get you anything?" Max said coming into the bedroom.

"Yeah, you." She said patting the seat next to her.

Max walked over to the bed and laid down next to Lorelai. "I wanna kiss ya right now for being so kind but I'm afraid I'll get you sick."

He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "Are you feeling any better?"

"A little. I'm so sorry this happened. And in a couple days you've got to do some work. It seems like we haven't gotten to have that romantic honeymoon you always hear about."

"Hey, as long as I'm with you right now, I'm fine. I'm just sorry you don't feel well."

"Yeah me too. Hey maybe when we get back to Stars Hollow we'll have our own little honeymoon. We can call it HM2."

"HM2?" He asked.

"Honeymoon 2…"

"Oh, sounds perfect. You know we should call Rory and your parents."

Lorelai made a rather annoying whining sound and lowered herself in the bed. "But I'm sick!" She complained.

"Fine not now, but when you're feeling better we should make sure to call them. I bet Rory really misses you."

"I'm sure she misses the third stair from the top in our house. I have no doubt in my mind that she's suffering at my parent's house."

"They're crazy about her. I'm sure she's having a great time."

"If by great you mean horrible then yeah, sure."

Max got out of the bed and turned the lights out. "You should get some sleep. It's getting late."

"Max?" She said quietly.

"Yes Lorelai?"

"Come lay down with me?" She asked quietly.

He smiled and closed the door while he walked back to the bed. He got underneath the covers with her and Lorelai instantly rested her head against the crook of his shoulder.

He kissed the top of her head. "Goodnight Lorelai."

"Goodnight Max."

_x-x-x-x-x_

The next few days Lorelai was still in recovery. It was Monday when she finally felt better. They were leaving Friday and Max had already started working on a few things. He had a couple of meetings to go to and a little bit of paperwork he did at nights. He felt horrible keeping her on her own at the hotel or around the town. He wanted to be with his wife but he knew that he was going to have to do this and she said she was fine with it.

Lorelai took a lot of time figuring things out in her head. She had lots going on in her mind and didn't have time to digest it all. If there was one thing she'd ban her head from thinking about, it would without a doubt be Luke. It was all so confusing. She wanted to know what he was thinking. She wanted to know _so many_ things. Why he didn't come after her, why he didn't say goodbye to her before she left, why didn't he come to the wedding even if his appearance was as innocent as Rory when she was 10. She wanted to know so many things and couldn't figure out a way to find them out.

_x-x-x-x-x_

On Wednesday afternoon, Max was out at a meeting while Lorelai walked around town a bit. She got a few things for Rory and a few things for her parents and friends. When she got back to the hotel, she flipped on the TV and realized for once, she didn't want to watch anything. She sat in the big arm chair and closed her eyes, lost in thought as if it was her paying job. She concentrated on one question, over and over again. How could she figure it out? The answers have arisen from time to time but something about the thought of figuring out her and Luke's situation scared her. She wanted to know _so badly_ what he was thinking but at the same time was terrified.

She couldn't take it any longer though. She walked over to the bedroom and closed the door making sure to lock it even though she was alone. She went to her purse and searched in the clustered pockets for her cell phone. When she finally found it, she picked it up and scrolled threw her phone book—_wow, I know a lot of people with names that start with L,_ she thought to herself.

She leaned against the bed on the floor and held the phone in her hand staring at the highlighted name on her phone. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, inhaling the fresh air pouring threw her window.

_Send._ She pressed the button and listened as the toned ring rang, filling her stomach with horrible feelings of nervousness. She was confident he wouldn't answer. And she was confident that she wouldn't leave a message. This was a one time kind of thing. He could either answer and she'd ask her questions or he wouldn't and she'd lose out. Either way, it was directly or not.

_This is Luke, leave a message._

Oh god, that voice. Her heart almost stopped beating.

"Luke? Hi, it's me, me Lorelai. I think you might have known that already though. I uh, listen; I'm actually just sitting on the floor of my bedroom in California cause well, I'm here on my honeymoon and I wasn't sure if you knew that cause you didn't show up at the wedding even though you had RSVPed so I had to just pay extra money for a no-show but that's okay, that's really okay because," she rubbed her forehead almost in tears because of how horrible she was being right now, "because, you uh, because you probably had other things to do. And I understand that. So, I guess I'll see you when I get back. I want to talk to—I have to go."

She hung up as quickly as possible. There was nothing more horrible than that message. She'd pray today and tonight and every other day till she got home that he wouldn't hear it. Of course he would though, and he would probably hate her so much for it.

She had to call back.

_Don't answer, don't answer, don't answer,_ she repeated over and over again.

_This is Luke, leave a message._

_Thank god,_ she thought.

"Luke, I'm so sorry about that. I just, I don't know where that came from. I didn't mean to sound like a horrible person just now, I just, I didn't know what to say and I still don't. It's just that I'm really upset and confused right now and I know I shouldn't be because, well…I'm sure we all know why I shouldn't be feeling like this now. For God sakes, I'm married. And, I don't even know who I—I just don't know what to think. I'm home on Friday though. I'm conveniently missing the classic Friday night dinners but maybe we can talk or something. I really need to talk to you. I'm just—I don't understand, why didn't you--" And right then and there, she was cut off.

_It was supposed to be a one time thing,_ she thought to herself about several different things. Originally with the message in mind but one thought led to another.

If only she knew how he felt…

_August Twelfth_

Luke was upstairs in his apartment still looking at the note. He had read it so many times his brain was going to explode. He had looked at it so long he could probably write it the exact same way as Lorelai did. He didn't know _what_ to do.

He had a few options. He could go. He could go and act as if nothing happened between them. Or he could go and do the whole movie thing where the guy comes to rescue the girl at the alter when they ask if anyone opposes to stand. Or, he could just not go.

First he had to figure out what exactly he wanted to do. It would be easier if he knew how to digest the letter correctly. He was never good at looking for subtext. He wanted to badly to go to the wedding and take her away from Max and spend another night with her that night and every night to come. He wanted to be with her more than anything but he knew it wouldn't work like that. She openly gave him permission to stop her, that much he could figure out, but did she really mean it? That was the real question.

He glanced at the clock. How was it already 4:25? The diner was closed for the day on account of everybody would be at the wedding.

The wedding that starts in 35 minutes.

He walked to his window and stared outside into the gazebo which was all set up.

It hit him like a bunch of bricks, what exactly he knew he had to do.

He got in the shower and took a quick shower. He got out and looked for his nice suit. After searching for it threw the back of his closet, he got dressed, fixed his hair, put his shoes on and took a look at the clock.

The wedding starts in 10 minutes.

He got up and looked outside the window.

He saw the one thing he knew if he saw, he'd change his mind.

He took his shoes off and threw his suit somewhere on the floor.

Friday came quicker than expected. The last two days were a little better than the others. They went out to dinner on Thursday night and went to breakfast Friday morning before their flight. Max had a lot of work related issues on his mind while Lorelai still had lots of Luke issues on her mind. He never called her back and she knew that was a bad sign.

They arrived home close to 5:00 pm. Rory was staying with Emily and Richard one last night so that Max and Lorelai could get adjusted on their own. Max had to go home and do some things at his house for a few hours. He took Lorelai home and walked all her stuff inside.

"I'm sorry I've got to go for a bit."

"It's okay; it gives me a chance to unpack."

"Yeah right, like you'd actually unpack the day we get back."

"I know that was weird coming from my mouth." She tried looking down at her own lips and shrugged.

"I'll be back soon though. And we'll do something for dinner."

"Perfect."

He leaned in and gave her a kiss.

"Bye Max." She said waving to him as he left.

When his car pulled out she ran up to her room and crashed into her bed. She closed her eyes for a few minutes before pulling herself out of bed.

She knew she had plenty to do. There was so much to be done but she didn't want to start any of it. All she really wanted right now was Luke's coffee. She could go and see him but that thought alone almost killed her.

But really, she could _go see him._

Before she knew what was happening she was driving over to the diner. Unsure of where the idea came from, she needed to go and she needed to go _now_ or else her head would honestly explode.

There were only a few people there. She parked across the street and looked into the diner windows. She didn't see him but she did see Caesar. He was probably in the back, she told herself. Or maybe he was cooking. Whatever it was he was doing, it made him invisible and damn it was pissing her off.

She got out of the car and walked into the diner. If she wasn't insane she would never be doing this. But everyone knows how insane she is. And there was no stopping her now because she had that look in her eye as she walked up to the diner and opened the doors.

_The smell._ She inhaled the environment of coffee and food, loving the comforting feeling it provided her with.

Luckily nobody she was very friendly with was in the diner. No Babette, no Patty, no Kirk, no nothing. Just a few random customers who had no interest in Lorelai or her honeymoon.

She sat at a stool and just as she looked up, he was in front of her, staring at her like he had never seen such an image. He didn't expect her to be _there_ at the diner. Not after what happened _that night,_ not after those messages, not after...her name was Lorelai. Because everyone knew facing somebody so quickly was not very Lorelai like.

They stared at each other for a long while. Neither new _what_ to say. They probably never would. They were both lost in thought, so many questions they wanted to ask each other but knew they shouldn't.

"Hey Luke." She said lamely. _Crap that came out wrong._

"Coffee?" He asked her.

_Gosh this is weird._ They both thought. They were acting completely normal minus the weird stares and that wasn't how things were supposed to go. They were supposed to be weird, and mean to each other, fighting, or kissing, or apologizing, not normal and asking for coffee.

"Please."

He poured her a cup and handed it to her; their hands both touching each others for a second.

"Thanks."

She took a sip and sighed into the cup.

"I missed this stuff." She said softly.

"Yeah well…it's been a while." He said leaning against the back of the counter acting more normal than ever.

"It has been."

They both shared another mutual eye conversation. He looked the same. Maybe a little different…it seems as though he hadn't shaved in a while. Otherwise he still wore flannel, jeans, and a backwards baseball hat so things looked the same. He noticed she looked different as well. A little worn out, but still beautiful like always.

"Hey Luke?" She asked quietly.

"Yeah?" She was going to ask him if he could talk. She had too.

"Can I have this coffee to go?"

Boy that came out wrong. Luke wordlessly grabbed her cup and poured it into a to-go cup.

"It's on the house." He said before she had the opportunity to take out her money.

"Thanks." She got up and headed towards the door. She placed her hand on the door knob and stayed put for a few seconds before turning around and looking at Luke who was still transfixed on her. "Can you come over tomorrow? Say around 3:00?"

"Sure." He said before he could think.

"Great. See you then."

As soon as she walked outside of the diner, Luke's facial expression changed into one confused face. That wasn't Lorelai, he convinced himself. Lorelai would never come in and talk to him the day she got back. She would never face her problems this soon.

_x-x-x-x-x_

"So did you do anything tonight?" Max asked crawling under the blankets with her.

"Uh, not really. I wanted to unpack but couldn't so I went to Luke's to get a cup of coffee." _Crap, I didn't mean to say that out loud._

"Oh good. I bet you missed his coffee."

"Oh of course. How about you? How's the house?"

"It's ready."

"Good." She said smiling.

"I just wanted to continue working on freeing up the guest bedroom. I moved around a lot of the furniture also."

"You know, it's just Rory and I moving in. Not a basketball team or anything." She said smiling.

"I know but have you seen the amount of stuff you guys have?"

"Ah, good point."

"So, a week and half…are you ready?"

"I'm more than ready." She said before leaning over to turn her bedside light off. "Goodnight, hun." She gave him a quick kiss.

"Goodnight."

_x-x-x-x-x_

It was almost 3:00 and Lorelai was scared out of her mind. She didn't even know if Luke was going to show up. Max was working, getting ready for the fall classes to begin and Rory was still at her grandparents until after dinner.

She put on her favorite jeans and a cute white shirt. She put her makeup on and right as she finished with that, the doorbell rang. Her stomach dropped to the ground and head started spinning.

_Responsible adults,_ she reminded herself, _we talk for a little while about what happened and that is all. When I get my answers, he can leave._

She walked down the stairs and to the door, checking herself one last time in the mirror. With her own self-approval, she opened the door and there he was.

"Hey, come on in." She said opening the door.

"I brought food. I didn't know if you had eaten lunch already or what so I just brought us some."

"Great…how about we go into the TV room? I'll go get some drinks for us."

"Alright."

She walked into the kitchen and almost did a double take. Was that honestly Luke back there? She wondered. He seemed so calm and cool, like nothing had ever happened with them when clearly something happened. Something _huge!_ And he acted as if he was completely dismissing it.

Maybe he didn't care as much as she thought he would. After all, it's not like he stopped her. He had the opportunity too but he didn't. That had to have said something. If only she knew what he was thinking? And to think that this was supposed to be them talking about how what happened scared her. She was starting to believe they'd never talk about _it._

She came back a few minutes later, drinks in hand. Luke had set out all the food and thanked her when she brought him his drink. She sat down and they both ate in peace, not once talking about _it._ They talked about the diner and how it's been doing, they talked about Kirk and how his mother chased him down the street the other night, and they talked about movies and Lorelai mocked him for not seeing quite a few.

When they finished eating, the topic of _it_ was almost off her mind. She was enjoying there time together and was thankful in a strange way that everything seemed to be okay.

"Want to watch TV?" She asked hopefully.

"Sure, I've still got a little time." He said glancing at the clock.

"Great." She looked around for the remote and flipped through the channels. When she came across a baseball game, she glanced at Luke who was already deeply concentrating on the game.

"I assume we have to watch this, huh?" She asked laughing.

"We don't have to." He said kindly.

"It's okay, we can." She put down the remote between their legs. They were sitting unusually close, it was probably unconscious but the fact was they were recognizing it _now _was what counted.

Normally Lorelai would have put up a fight about the game. She would have forced him to change it, but right now her mind wasn't focused on the TV or what was playing. It was focused on Luke, and how her body reacted to him sitting so closely. She was thinking about how badly she wanted to talk about stuff with Luke but she knew they were both playing around the fence because they simply weren't ready. Either they just didn't want to talk about it, or they didn't know _what_ to say, whatever it was, now wasn't the time and it sure as hell was awkward being so normal. She never imagined things would happen this way in a million years.

She shifted in her seat, resting her hands beside her legs which accidentally brushed across Luke's leg. She kept her hand on the side of her leg, close near his hand which was almost in the same position. After a few not so discrete minutes, Lorelai felt Luke's pinky running across her hand. The instant feeling almost made her dizzy. This certainly wasn't supposed to be happening. Not again. Cause after all, this is how is started the first time. The subtle touches, the casual glances…it wasn't supposed to happen again but it was and there was nothing they could about it.

At one point during the game that they were both so intensely watching, Luke's hand completely covered Lorelai's. There's a chance they would have stayed like that for the rest of their time together but thankfully, Rory called and interrupted them.

"Sorry about that." Lorelai said walking back into the room. "That was Rory. She's on her way home from my parents actually."

"Oh." Luke got up and looked around the room. "I should get going then."

"Oh, well, yeah I guess so. Thanks for bringing the food over."

"Anytime."

"I'm glad we got to…you know, hang out."

"Me too." He said honestly.

"Do you think…maybe you want to do the same thing tomorrow?" _And we can actually get some talking done._

"Really?" He asked surprised.

"Really."

"Uh…" he looked at her confused, "sure. Same time?"

"Same place."

"Perfect. So I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow." He repeated before walking out.

_Wow._ No coherent thoughts were formulating. It was all a bunch of 'huh's?' floating through her mind. She knew they weren't supposed to be like that today. They were going to be mature, she remembered.

So much for being mature.

She closed the door and leaned back against it, closing her eyes and sighing.

_x-x-x-x-x_

They spent the next four days together, Luke and Lorelai. Max was always working in the afternoon and Rory was out with Lane most of her afternoons. It was an unspoken agreement that at 3:00 everyday, Luke would come over with food, they'd talk, not once about _it,_ eat, watch TV, and play fake footsie or in most of the cases, handsie even though that wasn't a such thing.

It was Thursday and she knew she had to tell him something. The only thing was she wasn't sure how to approach him. She turned the TV off and turned to face him.

_Great, here's the talk._ He thought. He had been avoiding it all week. He didn't have answers for her. It wasn't something he could help though.

"So Luke." She said slowly.

"Yeah?"

"I've got some news and…I don't know, I just thought I should share it with you."

"What is it?"

"Well, man, I'm not sure how to say it, I guess I'll just say it as it should be said…I'm moving."

His eyes widened and dropped. "You're what?"

"Rory and I, we're moving in with Max in Hartford."

"How can you do that?" He asked utterly surprised.

"Well, we pack our stuff and one day, we're going to be taking it all over to Max's."

"I know _how_ you move, Lorelai. I just didn't know you were."

"I know you didn't. And I didn't mean to stun you or surprise you. I just didn't want to tell you yet."

"So when are you moving?"

She swallowed hard. "Three days."

Luke shot up from the couch. "Three days?" He asked loudly.

"Yes." She said quietly.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" He asked gesturing wildly with his hands.

"I don't know Luke. We've been having a nice week and well I don't know I didn't want to just drop the bomb on you."

"Well you just did."

"I know, and…I'm starting to think that was stupid."

"Well what do you expect? You should have told me sooner than this, damnit." He paced back and forth through out the room.

"I'm sorry Luke. I didn't know you'd take it so seriously."

"Why do you underestimate yourself so much Lorelai? You know that you're my best friend. I don't know why you think I wouldn't care."

She stayed quiet for a second, not knowing what to say.

"I have emotions too, you know."

Lorelai bit her bottom lip, afraid she'd cry or something she wouldn't want to say would come out of her mouth.

"You know what never mind, I've got to go."

Before she could say something else he was out the door and long gone.

The rest of the day, Luke was on her mind. She wanted to call him or go and see him but she figured that this was his thing. Sure it was wrong of her not to tell him but he was the one who was very upset about it (not saying she wasn't either) and he needed to be the one to cool off.

_x-x-x-x-x_

The next day, Lorelai went out shopping for things for the house. She knew Luke wasn't going to be over for there regular 3:00 visit so she didn't bother getting home by 3:00. When she finally got home it was close to 4:15. She noticed Luke's truck outside of her house so she walked quickly into her house.

"Hello?" She screamed.

"Up here!" He shouted from upstairs.

She walked up the stairs and found Luke sitting on her floor taping boxes on her floor. "Hey, you weren't here earlier so I came up here to look for you and saw your boxes lying around. So I decided to tape a few of them up for you. I did a few in the kitchen and downstairs bathroom as well."

"Luke you shouldn't have." She said sweetly.

"Why were you not done packing them up?"

"No I was, I just…after yesterday I didn't think you were going to come by."

"Hey, forget about yesterday. Let's just enjoy the time we've got left." She secretly wanted him to say the time they've have left _together._ She knew she shouldn't still be having these more than friendly feelings for Luke. She's _married._ Perhaps she was already feeling lonely; she hadn't seen Max much this week. He had been cramming for school to start in the next week and was really busy with all of his work.

"So, I've still got some time. You want to go finish up the bathroom or the kitchen?"

"That sounds perfect."

Close to an hour later they were done with the boxes they had been working on.

"Beer?" Lorelai asked pulling two bottles out.

"Sure, thanks."

"Hey come on; let's go outside for a bit, the weather's great."

She walked outside through the front door and sat down on the steps on the front porch. A few moments later, Luke appeared next to her, sitting down right beside her. They both stared out into the street, not really talking to each other. They stayed quiet for about 5 minutes before Lorelai felt Luke's hand on top of hers.

It was something about the fact that he was doing this even though she was moving in two days. It was something about the fact that had had his chance to be with her before and he didn't take her up on it. Something set her off and she wasn't prepared to bring it up at that specific moment but she did.

"Luke, stop." She took her hand away from his and stood up on the porch. "We can't keep doing this Luke. We can't keep pretending nothing happened!" She said loudly.

"Lorelai--"

"No Luke. I don't know when this got as weird as it did. I've enjoyed this past week with you, I really have, but I feel like after…that night, we ended on a really bad note. I don't know why you even talked to me when I got back from my honeymoon. It was very unlike us to suddenly pretend nothing happened when we both know very well that something big, something really big happened."

"Listen Lorelai. I don't know what to say…I'm just as confused about everything as you are. But if there's one thing that I know about that night, I know it was wrong. The timing couldn't have been any more wrong. I mean, you we're getting married the next day."

"You don't think I don't know that Luke? You don't think that everyday I feel more and guiltier for what I did with you that that night?"

"So it's my fault?"

"I'm not pointing fingers, Luke. It's my fault and it's the beers fault. Hey, I'm not going to lie. It was wrong, but it wasn't a drunken mistake. And, I don't regret it, I really don't, what we had and…have is special and I wouldn't take what we have. It was irresponsible of me and I shouldn't have done it."

They were both silent for a moment. Luke held his head in his hands before standing up.

"I'm sorry that I've been with you constantly this week. I didn't mean to make our innocent visits into something more. And right now, I just…I don't want you to go, Lorelai." He said honestly.

She'd miss him too. Hell, she already was missing him. But she couldn't tell him that the reason she thought it was so good to get away and live in Hartford was because it would mean getting away from him. That would sound rude, inconsiderate and very childish. As if she was running away from all her problems. But truth has its ways and that's the direction her truth took her. Running away from her problems just seemed easier right now.

"I miss you already." She said nodding. They took a second to look at each other before Lorelai leaned in to give him a hug. He held her in his arms for a good few seconds, hugging her tightly trying to keep this feeling locked in his mind, the feeling of her body against his. He began pulling away but she whispered 'not yet' into his ear.

Moments later, they pulled away and Luke handed her his bottle of beer before walking down the steps to his car.

"Hey Luke?" She called out before he opened his door.

He turned around and looked at her.

"I'll come visit."

He nodded his head and smiled before getting into the car.

She watched him drive off and it suddenly hit her that that would be the last time she'd watch him drive out of her driveway in Stars Hollow.

_x-x-x-x-x_

Early Sunday morning, Rory, Max, and Lorelai were up and ready to leave. They had everything in two cars. Lorelai and Rory were following Max to their house with more stuff in her car. Max was already waiting in his car waiting for the girls to be ready. They both stood in front of the cleaned out house and stared straight ahead.

"So," Lorelai said with a monotonous voice, "you're still okay with this?" She asked.

"I'm still okay with it." Rory repeated confidently.

"Well then, say goodbye."

"Goodbye house." Rory said out loud to the house. She gave her mom a quick kiss on the cheek before walking to the jeep.

When Rory was out of sight, Lorelai whispered, "goodbye house."

_x-x-x-x-x_

They had arrived at their house a little over 30 minutes later. They were already dragging in boxes labeled "Lorelai's Room" because she needed to find a spare change of clothes and different shoes. She went into the first two boxes with no luck but it wasn't until the third box she opened and found a piece of paper on top of it.

She opened it up and looked at the handwriting, noticing it instantly.

_There's only one thing that can stop me._

_-Lorelai._

Tears welled to her eyes as she turned it over and noticed something on the back.

_The only thing that could have stopped you was yourself._

TBC

_

* * *

_

Leave a review:) Thank you!


	3. U Turn

**Who Lies Beneath**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, so therefore don't sue me. Gilmore girls belongs to ASP and the WB.

**Summary:** LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistake before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

**Authors Note:** We're back for chapter 3! Sorry the update took so long, it's been taking me forever to write the story. But we finally have it for you guys. First off, thanks again sooo much for the reviews! You guys are incredible and it means so much to us when we get reviews! So thanks to all the people both here on fanfiction and those of you on fanforum! And second, chapter 3 is a little bit shorter than your average chapter but the next chapter will change that:) Enjoy the chapter and please review!

* * *

**Chapter 3: U-Turn**

It wasn't a completely stupid idea to wear sunglasses to bed; after all…it would be one less annoying way to wake up in the morning. Lorelai squinted her eyes and inhaled the smell of coffee flowing threw the house. She sat in bed, trying to wake herself up but it was near impossible at this ungodly hour. The only trick into getting her up would be the coffee, but in this condition, getting the coffee would mean getting out of the bed and getting out of the bed would mean getting up and risking being cold until she can grab her robe and slippers.

But she had things to do and people to see and being cold for 30 seconds ended up not being all that bad. She hobbled down the stairs, eyes still half way closed as she walked into the kitchen.

"Good, you're up." He handed her a cup of coffee and gave her a quick kiss. "I was going to get you up myself but I figured the coffee would wake you."

"Mmm," she mumbled taking the first sip, "it's never failed so far."

"And as long are you're alive, it probably never will." He said, smart-mouthing her.

"I always knew you had a sarcastic side. Now it was just a matter of when it'd actually come up."

He smiled and sat down at the table with her. "So do you have to leave early?" He asked.

"If by early you mean within the next hour, then yes. It's going to be a long day; we have a wedding tomorrow so we'll probably be up late setting it up."

"Oh is this the wedding that your parents are going too?"

"Yeah, they'll be there. So you know what that means…I've got to make sure it's perfect."

"Yes, for your parents, not the bride and groom."

"Right."

"Well as long as we've gotten that straightened out." He got up from his seat and put his cup in the sink. "So listen, I've got to leave a little earlier today. I've got some things coming in."

He took out a thermos and filled it to the top with coffee. "This is for you before you leave." He said pointing to the thermos sitting on the counter.

She smiled, looking around at everything. The house, the thermos sitting on the counter looking so shiny like it wants to be touched (dirty!), the beautiful man standing right next to it. She sighed, _all this is mine._ She smiled and stood up before walking over to him and kissing him soundly on his lips.

"I'm happy about all of this, Luke." She said pulling away from his lips.

"What? The fact that you willingly drink decaf coffee? Cause to be honest; I thought you'd never live to that rule."

"Not just that, silly," she hit him on his stomach, "just, everything. You, me…it," she grabbed Luke's hands and placed them on her stomach, "I'm just glad we turned out _like this._ So…I don't know, so positive." She was smiling like a giddy little girl on Christmas.

"I'm glad too, Lorelai. For a long time, I thought we'd never…happen."

"Blasphemy!" She winked and gave him a quick kiss. "Just…thought I'd let you know how I'm feeling these days."

"Well thanks for sharing." He said honestly.

"And thanks for caring." She giggled quietly before resting her head on his shoulder, inhaling the scent of him. "I made a rhyme!"

He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her in to a complete hug. "Goodbye crazy lady." He said rolling his eyes before kissing her on top of her head.

"Bye babe."

She smiled to herself as she watched him walk out the back door. She rested her hands on her stomach, looked down, and sighed happily.

_

* * *

"Mom wake up!" Rory shook her mother furiously until Lorelai opened her eyes._

"What?" Lorelai asked, finally opening her eyes.

"You've got to take me to school! I'm going to be late."

Lorelai shot up in bed and looked at the clock. She sighed disappointedly when she realized she had no where for herself to be. "Did you forget you live with Max?"

"Of course not."

"Well, last time I checked he works at that stupid school you go to."

"He had to leave early, remember?" Rory pulled the covers off from her mom.

Lorelai groaned before getting out of bed and putting on a sweatshirt. "Let's go."

"Aren't you going to get dressed?" Rory asked annoyed.

"What's the point? I'm coming back home and going straight back to sleep. It's not like I have anywhere else to go…" she sighed loudly and looked for her keys on the desk in their room.

_x-x-x_

Luckily the drive was much shorter with their new living conditions. With living so close to Chilton, there was no hour transmute there and back. Instead, it was only a 10 minute drive there and back and Lorelai liked it a lot more.

As soon as she got home, she walked straight back up the stairs and mumbled something before throwing herself in their bed. She wrapped the covers around her and lied on her stomach, staring at the clock.

This was getting boring…day after day, sleeping, eating, cleaning, and watching TV. She always thought it would be the dream day but not _everyday_ and that's how it had been recently. Ever since the big move, Lorelai removed herself from the Independence Inn. Probably, and hopefully not forever but just for a few months while they got their life settled down. She was heartbroken to have to leave but knew it was something she had to do while she adjusted to living at Max's house in Hartford.

It certainly wasn't Stars Hollow, too. The very thought of saying to somebody 'I live in Hartford' made her stomach twist and turn. To be back and living in the same town she lived in before she left, before she ran away, wasn't a very homey feeling. Max knew Lorelai had to take sometime to adjust but lately it's like all she does is mope around the house alone, wishing she could be behind the front desk at the Inn bugging Michel or talking to Sookie in the kitchen as she messed around with yet another food concoction.

The past two weeks had been fine. They had finally gotten everything unpacked and organized most of their stuff. There were still small nicks and adjustments that needed to be made but they'd all get done in due time. She certainly wasn't superwoman and with that said, it explained why she couldn't get everything done so quickly. Moving had been a long, annoying process. She knew that when she removed the last item from her boxes that she wouldn't want to do this whole moving process again anytime soon at least.

But now with nothing left to unpack or organize, she didn't have much to do during the days. Luckily Rory got home close to 3:30 everyday, followed by Max who came home more towards the 5 o'clock hour. She knew that Rory was adjusting well. Sure she missed Dean and Lane, but she still often saw them. Lorelai on the other hand hadn't been back to Stars Hollow _since_ the moving day. She hadn't seen anybody except for Sookie once but that was when she came to see the house a few days ago. She told her that they missed her over at the Inn and that Tobin's day time managing skills were just as annoying as the night time skills. They had hired a new night time manager to take over Tobin's spot while Tobin took over Lorelai's.

Sookie even admitted to Michel missing Lorelai. Sure most of the reason was probably because Tobin annoyed Michel more than anybody, but still the thought of Michel missing her easily made her smile. She hadn't asked Sookie or anybody for that matter about Luke. She hadn't spoken to him since their final goodbye on her porch. She wanted to call him so many times after reading _the note._ She kept it in her bottom drawer because not only did she not want Max or even Rory to find it, but also because knowing her, she would loose it if it wasn't somewhere safe.

_What would she say?_ That was the number one question on her mind. Endless possibilities were at hands reach but she couldn't think of the correct one. She wasn't going to lie to herself either, just about every morning she woke up with him on her mind and almost every night, she fell asleep next to Max, thinking about him and their night spent together. How special it was to be with him, how great and loved he made her feel. Often times, she'd close her eyes and the image of them cuddling in bed flooded her mind. She recalled the way he made her feel which would probably always stay with her because after all, he was the only one that had ever made her feel like that.

_x-x-x_

"So what movie do you guys want to watch tonight?" Lorelai asked while sitting down next to Max on the couch.

"I'm looking to see what's on TV." Rory said flipping channels from the floor.

Lorelai nodded her head and turned to Max. "Dinner was great."

"I knew you could eat something healthy every once in a while."

"I guess it doesn't hurt."

"Oh mom, look!" Rory flipped the channel and turned the volume up. "Remember this movie? We saw it like 2 years ago and endlessly mocked it since then!"

Lorelai turned to the TV and looked at it strangely before she noticed what movie it was.

"Is this…" She began.

"Killed Innocence." Rory quickly replied.

Lorelai rolled her eyes and sat back against the arm of the couch.

"Killed Innocence? What's this about?" Max asked suddenly interested.

Before Lorelai could get a word out, Rory was already tumbling with the description.

"It's about a woman who cheats on her husband with this complete stranger. She met him at a bar and they slept with each other that night though they weren't drunk. So from then on, they've been having this scandalous affair and it isn't until husband walks in on them doing the dirty deed that they call it quits."

Max laughed at how pathetic and twisted the movie sounded while Lorelai sat there growing more and more uncomfortable by the second. This was _exactly_ the kind of movie she needed to make herself feel even worse than she has for the past month or more. _At least he's not a stranger…_she thought to herself.

"Sound's pretty crazy if you ask me."

"Oh it is. When we saw the ending, we sat there staring at the TV over a good 5 minutes trying to imagine an even worse ending than the one we got."

"How does it end?" Max asked, truly intrigued.

"The wife kills her husband to be with the other guy but it's too late because he's back with his ex-girlfriend."

Max stared at Rory dumbly. "Sounds like a horrible movie." He stated.

"It is. A perfect mockable movie too."

"Turn it up." He said.

Lorelai stubbornly faced the TV, playing uncomfortably with her hands. Every few seconds she'd move around in her seat, breaking one of her own movie rules. About 10 minutes into the movie, Max pulled Lorelai towards him and she rested her head on his shoulder as his arm was settled around her, pulling her into him.

She tried closing her eyes but it didn't help. She still heard the voices of the creepy characters and flinched when certain things were said.

'_Sorry about my friend.' The main character—Kevin—said walking towards Claire._

'_It's okay. People tend to get pretty rowdy here.'_

'_So, what do you say, let me buy you a drink?'_

'_I have a better idea.' _Lorelai knew what was happening. She (being Claire) took a bottle of wine from behind the bar while nobody was looking and led him towards a room in the back. She almost asked Rory to turn the movie off. Besides the brief sexual scenes she didn't need her daughter to watch (though she had already seen it and many more explicit sexual scenes before) this movie here, with Max and her. Plus, Lorelai was very uncomfortable sitting there with the two of them.

She opened her eyes and watched the woman take the man into the back. She placed the wine down and walked up to him with a devil look in her eyes. She snaked her arms around his waist and kissed him hardly on his lips, pushing him against the wall. Lorelai shrieked in disgust, thinking about how different _her_ time with _him_ was from this. _It wasn't in a banded room for one, two, I knew him longer than 8 minutes…try 8 years. And three, it was special and this is far from special. This is two lonely people who haven't gotten any action in a respectable (to them) time frame._ She shook her head, trying to disregard any thoughts of Luke. He was the last person that should be on her mind (in any scenario, really) especially since Max was calmly rubbing his hand up and down her thigh as he watched the couple go at it. He pulled her closer to him once again and she closed her eyes.

Lorelai fell asleep and woke up in the middle of the movie. It was the scene where the husband, Will, found Claire and Kevin half way to naked on their couch.

"How could she do that to her husband?" Max asked out loud.

"I have no idea, and it's sad too cause they seemed so in love before anything started with Kevin." Rory said.

Lorelai closed her eyes, careful to make sure nobody knew she was awake. She figured that at some point in time, Max and or Rory had figured out she was sleeping. Cause Lorelai quiet during any movie was very unlikely.

"I mean, you've got to be a real—and excuse my language—bitch to do that too your husband after all that he's done for her so far. And you'd think coming close to being caught practically three times would have given her a clue to take it down a notch but apparently not."

"Well that's what she gets for cheating." Rory said pointing to the TV during the part where the couple drastically separated away from each other.

In actuality, Lorelai fell back asleep until the last scene of the movie. It was the scene where Claire leaves Kevin's house after they've said their 'final goodbyes.' She watched the last scene play out; the music and color fade away very slowly.

She shifted her head up and looked around the room, pretending to be a bit more confused than she actually was.

"Oh good you're awake. I was going to wake you up."

"Yeah I must have fallen asleep."

"You're not the only one." He said pointing to Rory lying down on the ground with a pillow and blanket.

"Aw, let's leave her there. She looks comfortable."

"Alright." He grabbed her hand and lifted her from the couch. "You ready for bed?"

She glanced at the ending credits of the TV and grabbed the remote from the table, turning off the TV as quietly as possible. "Let's go."

They walked hand in hand up to their room, shutting the door behind them. "You missed one crazy movie." He took of his shirt and threw it on the floor.

Lorelai looked up from the end of the bed where she was firmly planted. She bit her lip and arched an eyebrow up at him. "What?"

"I was just saying how you missed the movie. It was crazy though, I wouldn't have assumed the woman to--"

Lorelai stood up and cut him off, grabbing him by his hands and pulling him down onto the bed with her, lips crashing into each others.

She physically _could not_ listen to him talk about that. She didn't need to know what his verdict was on the woman who cheated on her husband, over and over again. Sure with Luke they only slept together (in her mind though, made love was a better way of putting it) once but they had secret rendezvous' all the time before she moved. She had every right to feel as guilty as she was at the moment.

She rolled on top of him and quickly stripped off the rest of his clothes. Max tried slowing her down, but she had a look of heat in her eye, a look he wasn't quite familiar with and really didn't know _how_ to respond too.

"Hey, Lorelai--" She grabbed a hold of his hands, intertwining her fingers within his and held them above his head. She leaned down, pressing her forehead against his and kissed him hardly. He tried loosening his grip around her hands, not because it hurt but because she was being wild and he wasn't in the mood for wild…per say.

She collapsed her body on top of his, closing any possible space between them. All she needed right now was to be with him, to feel him, to be in _his_ arms. They stayed like that for a few minutes, Max almost nervous to move. She finally got up long enough to take off the rest of her clothes before pouncing right back down on top of him. She kissed him with so much passion and energy it was almost shocking. It was a whole new experience and feeling, especially for her.

Her power against him was weakening. He took advantage of the time to gently flip her underneath him. He held her hands above her head like she did before though he held them much looser than she did. He took his lips away from hers and looked at her. Her eyes were tightly closed and she looked very stiff, squirming at his touch. He knew something was up but didn't know how to approach it. He had never seen this side of her before. She anxiously reached her head up to meet his lips but he insisted otherwise.

"Lorelai, open your eyes." He said softly, touching the side of her hair.

She kept her eyes closed for a few more moments. She could tell that he was staring at her and it made her uncomfortable. She opened her eyes and instantly regretted it. She felt so horrible. Here is this wonderful guy who doesn't deserve this kind of behavior from her. Here he is trying to make love to his wife while she's there trying to get his lips on hers so she didn't have to look at his face any longer. She felt too guilty to make any kind of eye contact with him.

She finally got the courage to look him in his eyes. She held eye contact with him for nearly a minute before she spoke. "I need you Max."

With that, she relaxed her body and anxiously awaited his mouth to cover hers again.

The actual process was just as weird and tense. Max thought she had cooled off and eased down a bit but she was—like he said before—different. She controlled everything. She made sure that he was enjoying it more than she was. She knew in the back of her mind, this was pity. She felt horrible for the guy and that was the only way she could make it a little bit better, as wrong as it sounded.

She collapsed on top of him and rested her head near his neck, both of them catching their breath. She kissed his neck softly, murmuring to him.

"I love you." She said quickly in between kisses.

"I love you too." He said kissing the top of her head.

She lifted her head up and held his face near hers, kissing him softly.

"So much." She whispered, kissing him again. "Really."

"I know Lorelai."

_I know Lorelai._ He didn't know though. Sure he knew she loved him, because after all she did, she just wasn't sure how much. She felt emotional _pain_ for him. He didn't know, he didn't know anything and it was killing her. Keeping this huge lie from him, it was slowly killing her.

It came to the point of discomfort where she had to cry. She couldn't hold in her tears much longer. She had been trying to hide them from him for _two weeks,_ but something about tonight—she couldn't keep them in any longer.

The second he saw tears stream down her face, he wrapped his arms around her small body and pulled her face down to his.

"What's the matter?" He asked concerned.

She bit her lip, trying so hard not to let more come down. This was horrible; she didn't know what to say. She had absolutely no explanations for this except the truth which could not be told right now.

Maybe staying quiet would be best after all.

She shook her head, unable to formulate words. She rolled off of him and turned away from him. He wrapped his body around hers and held her close to him, feeling her body move when she'd cry.

They stayed that way for almost thirty minutes. He didn't want to ask what it was and she _didn't_ want to tell. So it remained that…that day, whatever it was that made Lorelai cry would never be brought up again.

_x-x-x_

Max left without waking her up the next morning. She awoke in the messy bed and to a note plastered to the side of her bedside table saying that he didn't want to wake her cause she looked like she was sleeping well.

Flashbacks of the night before sure woke her up. She couldn't believe she cried, like that, in front of him. She was ashamed and embarrassed (at the current moment) and he wasn't even there. She was embarrassed to be around herself though and that's what was uncomfortable.

She couldn't live this guilt any longer but didn't know how to cope with it without telling the truth. She could tell the truth, and one day she probably would. But she felt too guilty to tell him the truth right now which is why she needed to talk to somebody else first.

And she knew exactly who that was.

She looked at the clock, it was 8:15. She got up, changed her clothes and walked right out the door with just her keys and wallet. She got in the car and sped down her street into the familiar town she loved.

It still looked the same. Though she didn't expect much difference in only two weeks, seeing as how Stars Hollow probably looked the same 10 years ago. She parked in her special spot and climbed out of the door, walking furiously towards the diner.

She hadn't thought about what she was going to say. All she knew was it was going to be along the lines that what they did, that night, _was a mistake._

She opened the diner and everybody turned to her when she walked in. Luckily nobody too important was there except for Taylor and Kirk who were in a heated argument about why Kirk can't be Taylor's sidekick.

She stood at the front of the diner, the bells still somewhat jingling. He was there and that's all she cared about. She held eye contact with him, both stiff faces, for quite some time. He held onto a plate and looked over her, noting really had changed.

From the second he walked in, he knew it wasn't going to be a pleasant visit.

She walked over to the counter and sat down right next to him. She put her purse down and smirked in his direction.

"Things still look the same." She said coldly.

"They don't normally change." He said when he finally grasped onto some words.

"Good, good, that's great." She said trying so hard to play cool though it wasn't working at all. He slid the plate down to the person on the other side of the counter and averted his eyes back to hers.

"So, I haven't seen you since…you left." He said trying to make small talk. He knew something was up but just wasn't sure when or how it would come up.

"I'm glad you noticed." She snapped.

"Well, of course I noticed…"

She stayed quiet, looking directly past him to the no cell phones sign. All of a sudden it intrigued her more than ever. Really, what's the problem with having cell phones?

"Luke, we have to talk." She said quietly, leaning up towards his face.

Their closeness almost made him uncomfortable. Her face was directly next to his and her eyes peered into his.

"Okay…" He said shakily.

"Luke, what happened…that night, with you and I…" she whispered, searching for the correct ending to that sentence.

And that's when it hit her that it _wasn't a mistake._ It was the furthest thing from a mistake that's ever dawned upon her. And there was no way she could sit there and blame him, the guy she spent the night of her life with. She couldn't point fingers because if there was anyone she should scream at, it would be herself. She's the one who dared him to kiss her, she's the one who led him to the bed, she's the one who said she wanted it.

"Excuse me sir?" A woman said from the end of the counter. They still stared at each other, Luke inwardly cursing the woman next to him.

"Yeah?" He asked finally dragging himself away from her.

"Can I have some more syrup?" She asked.

"Of course."

He walked to the back and grabbed a new bottle of syrup and returned it to the lady at the counter. He walked back to her and prompted their conversation.

"You were saying?" He said quietly.

"The house looks great." She said quickly. "We finally got everything together and…it really looks, just great."

Luke's mouth opened slightly, looking at her in a weird way.

"It was so nice of Max to get rid of all his junk to give us space for our junk. We needed it so badly." She said smiling. "It was so cute, the other day; we were talking about how Rory needed more space for her books so he cleared off two of his shelves and gave the space to her."

He stood there, staring at her dumbfound. What was she trying to do?

_Make him jealous._ She thought to herself. She didn't _mean_ for there conversation to be like this. She really didn't. She just started and really couldn't stop.

"I love the new house." She stated. "It's very homey. I never thought I'd find another house to live in that had that…very homey effect on it but I did and I love it."

He had no words for her. He didn't _want_ to speak to her or hear about this stuff _at all._ This wasn't how he expected seeing Lorelai would be. Not after how they ended. Then he quickly thought about the note he left in her box and if she ever found it.

"We're all just doing great, really. Rory loves it there, Max loves us being there, I love it there…it's all just really, really great."

"Well that's great." Luke said flatly.

"It is." She said smiling. "Coffee to go, please."

He turned around, thankful he didn't have to stare her in her eyes any longer. He poured her a cup and handed it to her.

"It's on me." He said before she could get money out of her purse.

"Thanks Luke. Take care, okay?" She turned around and walked right out the door.

_That_ was horrible.

She sighed and walked back to her car.

_x-x-x_

"I thought I'd find you over here." Max said approaching Rory at her locker.

"Oh hey, what's up?" She asked.

"I'm actually going to leave now too. I wanted to know if you wanted a ride."

"That would be nice considering the fact we live together." Rory said closing her locker.

"Well then, off we go."

They walked out into the teacher's parking lot where Max's space was. They both climbed into the car and got adjusted before pulling out of the lot.

"So your day was good?" He asked.

"Not too bad, I turned in my paper for history."

"How did it end up looking?"

"I think she'll enjoy it."

"I'm sure she will. I read it before school and thought it was done perfectly."

"Thanks but you have to say that."

"Why do I _have_ to say that?"

"Cause…you're my teacher and…my step-dad." She said oddly. She had never really called him that before but it had to come out sooner or later.

He smiled. "I can still admire your work, you know."

"I guess."

"You're mom does. She's not your teacher but, she's your mom."

"You're right."

They were both quiet for a few minutes before Max approached a topic.

"Hey Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"You know, I wouldn't be asking you these kinds of things because I don't even know how right I am about it but…have you noticed something, I don't know, different about your mother lately?

"Different how?" Rory asked.

"Just…she's not her usual self."

Rory thought about it for a moment. "I guess she has been acting a little different lately."

"I think she's still a little…I don't know, weirded out by the move I guess."

"You don't think she wants to live here?" Rory asked condescendingly.

"No, no, that's not what I think. I just think she misses Stars Hollow, and…her friends, and the Inn, that's all."

Rory looked over at Max and sighed. "I have no doubt in my mind she misses everything."

They stayed quiet for a while before Rory gasped in excitement. "I have an idea!"

"What?"

"Well, mom hasn't really seen anybody lately…and not a lot of people have seen the house yet…"

"Right…" Max said, prompting her to continue.

"Why don't we have a little party? It doesn't have to be huge but just big enough for everyone who wants to come and see the house to actually do so."

Max thought about the idea for a while. The thought of inviting everybody to see the house was a big deal, but he wanted to do something special for Lorelai since she had been a little more down about things lately. He figured it would be a good idea and a nice gesture; to invite everybody over to see the house and their new living arrangements.

"You're an excellent thinker, Rory."

"Thank you." She said smiling proudly. "I like to think I am!"

That night at dinner, they ran the idea past Lorelai who enjoyed it very much. She made sure that they surprised her with whom to invite, but to make sure that they do invite _everybody._ And by everybody, she meant everybody.

They had made plans for it to be next Friday. Max and Rory were in charge of everything and were both very excited to begin the planning.

_x-x-x_

Friday snuck up quicker than she imagined. She had spent the whole week arranging things to look presentable for the party.

She had been more excited than she figured. She didn't know who would actually show up but she was glad that they were doing this. She really needed to see everybody. And when she said everybody she even meant Taylor and Kirk because she missed the annoyance of their presence.

She really wanted Luke to come though. She wanted him to see her lifestyle, to understand what she was living in. She also wanted to see him so she could apologize perhaps. She wanted to talk to him sooner rather than later and hoped that wasn't too much too ask for.

Max and Rory told her they should expect people to arrive around 8. It was close to 7:30 when Lorelai was getting ready. Max and Rory were setting up tables and chairs along with food and drinks in the living room. Lorelai was too busy trying to think about which outfit _he_ would like better on her. She picked the tight pair of jeans and a white low cut linen type shirt with a somewhat plunging neckline. She wore her new sandals, hair down and wavy with just the right amount of makeup. She looked at herself one last time in the mirror before going downstairs and waiting for the guest to arrive.

"This is so exciting!" She said walking down the stairs.

Max and Rory exchanged smiles while they noted how happy Lorelai seemed.

It was almost like she was back to normal.

_x-x-x_

People started arriving a little after 8, just like what was said. Sookie and Jackson were the first ones to come. They had brought some food for the party, and promised to be there before everybody else which happened to work in the long run.

The door was kept open for the first hour. People flooded in threw out the first hour of the night. A lot more people had showed up than she imagined. She made the rounds, saying hi to everybody she possibly could. She wore a cheerful smile the whole time, so happy to see everybody once again.

But there was one person missing and she was almost getting sick of waiting.

* * *

_August Twelfth_

They had exchanged vows; they had exchanged loving looks and touches during the ceremony. They were ready to say I do and start the party. They held hands loosely as they listened to the man talk about what it means to be married. She had a profile view of the crowd. She knew he wasn't going to come.

She should be punished to be standing there, about to say I do to her husband-to-be and be thinking about another man. Another man that she desperately wanted to see again but knew wasn't coming.

"I do." She heard him say.

He smiled at her and tightened his grip around her hand.

Suddenly, everything was swarming into reality. They was no turning back now, she was all in whether or not she wanted to be.

_Unless…_

"I do." Her voice was quiet and unfamiliar. Foreign to even her. She caressed the top of his hand with her thumb.

There was really no turning back now.

It was final.

It was complete.

He couldn't save her this time because simply, it was too late.

She'd still wait for him during the party, she knew that already.

She'd probably look for him every time she was dancing with somebody.

She'd probably look for him while they ate dinner and cut the cake, smudging it into each others face.

She'd probably look for him while she was leaving in Max's car to head back to their house to spend there first night together as a married couple.

And chances are, she'd think about him while she spent the night making love to her husband.

* * *

And right now, at this very moment, she knew that if he wasn't going to come—again—that she would have to go.

And that's exactly what she was going to do.

Go.

So she grabbed her keys and headed out the door when once again…

There was no turning back.

* * *

**A/N 2:** Oh, it's those cliffhangers you all know and love:) Leave us a review and let us know if you want more! ;) I hope the next chapter will be up quicker than this one because it's got lot's going on!


	4. Dead End

**Who Lies Beneath**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, so therefore don't sue me. Gilmore girls belongs to ASP and the WB.

**Summary:** LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistake before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

**Authors Note: **Here we go again! First off, so sorry for the incredibly long update. I had a really hard time starting this chapter cause it's got a lot going on but alas, it's finally here. Secondly, big thanks to everybody that's reviewed! It would be great to personally thank all of you but I'm afraid it's almost 2 am and I don't have the strength to do that. But you guys all are amazing so thank you again! Keep leaving us feedback, we love to know what you think! I'm hoping that the 5th chapter won't take as long as this one but thanks for being patient and wanting to wait! Take care.

* * *

She couldn't drive any faster even if she tried.

Well, she probably could but there's a chance some stupid _Hartford_ cop might pull her over and then who'd know where she'd wind up that night.

She probably wouldn't end up back in _her_ town, yelling at Luke about how she is sad and angry and pissed and crushed that he didn't come after her. She wanted to blame _him_, to rub it in _his_ face, that what they did that night—despite how earth shattering it was—has made her absolutely miserable.

It hadn't hit her yet; hit her that it really _wasn't_ his fault, hit her that the visit soon to come was probably going to be a disaster if she said everything she wanted to say.

And oh, she had a lot to say.

xx

It wasn't until she reached Stars Hollow when she realized it was raining.

Not the kind of 'I'm singing in the rain' rain. It wasn't soft, warm summer rain which she loved. It was dark and cold and thunder was crashing threw the sky as she drove the familiar streets. Lightning struck occasionally, but wasn't as constant as the roaring crashes that at this point, drove her nuts. Though the wind blowing in threw her cracked window didn't bug her very much.

Her face was somewhat calm (which was relief) and content. She tried to concentrate on the road as much as possible but it was tough with everything on her mind.

xx

It only took about 20 minutes to get into town this time. It wasn't until she passed her old house when she realized how serious she was about all of this. She was going to tell him how she feels.

She pulled into a parking spot far down the street from the diner just so she could make sure if she chickened out that he wouldn't spot her, at least right away. She turned off her engine and sighed loudly as she stared out the window at the Luke's Diner sign.

Her eyes quickly averted to his apartment. Her stomach fell to a pit when she realized, she had to do this because it has been haunting her mind, day in, day out. Plus, she ditched her own comfort party to come here.

She sighed, taking the keys out of the ignition and opening her door harshly. She slammed it shut and started running threw the rain as quick as possible. It wasn't too far but it was wet and slippery and her running was a bet delayed.

She ran facing down, afraid she'd see somebody she knew and embarrass the hell out of herself. It only took her a minute or so until she was crossing the alley near Luke's and was running onto the beginning of the sidewalk near the building.

An abrupt noise caused her to look up when she did. She swung her head to the front and glanced at Luke who was facing away from her, putting the 'CLOSED' sign on the door. Her heart beating faster and faster as she approached the diner, legs threatening to give up, she make it to the front near the door.

It wasn't until she was only a few feet away from him that he realized somebody was near by. He turned around and was clearly speechless, as was she. The both stared at each other as she took her final steps towards him. She was still being drenched by the rain unlike him who was standing on top of the steps.

Lost for words? Yes, but it was honestly now or never.

"Why didn't you come after me!" She screamed over the rain, her breath still heavy and rapid.

Her voice almost sounded like she was begging. She wanted her answer though; she didn't come here to play silent treatment with Luke.

After a few minutes of no response, she sighed heavily. He wasn't going to say something? No, after all she had been threw to get here she was going to get her answers.

"Why didn't you come after me Luke? I waited for you!" She shouted again, hoping it would permit some sort of facial expression at least, but nonetheless, it didn't. "I waited for you ever since I left your apartment that morning and you never came!"

Her breathing was becoming more and more labored from having to scream over the rain. He wouldn't come any closer to her though and she wasn't going to be the one to run up there and wrap her arms around him.

She waited for what felt like forever for her response. She wanted her answers and she wanted them now. She kept steady eye contact with him, hoping that she could get some answers from at least the look he shot her way. But never put it past Luke to make this the most complicated experience of her life. She had no idea what he was thinking or how he was feeling. She wanted to know everything though. She wanted to know the answers of her questions most because she never expected to ask him these things in the first place. This _wasn't_ what she had planned as to be her first words.

Complete opposite actually.

"Say something, Luke!" He had no words though, no answers for her.

Nothing that she'd want to hear at least.

"Didn't you get my note?" She yelled.

She begged him this time, with her eyes to answer her. She needed it like it was coffee. Besides the idiotic feeling of embarrassment, she wanted to know what she did wrong, what she did to make him keep his distance.

"Of course I got your note, Lorelai! I must have read it over 50 times that day too!" He finally spoke. His voice was loud and sounded bitter. It wasn't the kind of voice she wanted to hear coming from him but hey, right now, it's better than nothing at all.

"Well did you understand what I was saying?" She asked. "I _told you_ that you could stop me, Luke, I told you."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but you gave me permission to ruin your wedding." Luke stepped down the steps and approached her. "You gave me permission to stop you from saying yes to Max who thought you wanted to be with him. You gave me the opportunity to humiliate myself in front of the whole town…"

"But--" She started but he cut her off.

"No, just…listen for a second Lorelai. You spent the night with me and left the next morning with no word but a one sentence note that could possibly be the most confusing note I've ever received in my life. You told me I could be your…your hero and save you from the disastrous wedding you claim you didn't want to be apart of. But you know what Lorelai? That wasn't my job! It wasn't my job to save the day and sweep you off your feet at the alter. I told you how I felt that night; I told you what you meant to me. And you had nothing to say in return."

She searched for words but they just weren't coming to her head. Luckily, he still had more to say.

"How do you think that made me feel? Not too good in case you were wondering. You _knew_ where I was in the game. You knew I wanted to be with you more than anything so it was your decision to make. Not mine. Because to me, the impression you left me with was that…that was your last scheme while being a single woman. That, that night was a joke and meant nothing to you. It was just your final time having fun and enjoying life without being _married_ to someone."

Lorelai's heart sank and eyes widened as she heard what he was saying.

"You thought it was a _joke_, Luke?"

"It sure as hell seemed like it!" They were back to screaming because the rain was coming down quicker and louder than before.

Lorelai couldn't believe it. Was he insane? He ought to be to have a thought like that.

"Great, I'm so relieved to know that you thought it was a joke. I'm so glad that you realized me spending the night with my best friend of 4 years, the night before my wedding, risking everything I had going for me was a joke!" She said in absolute sarcasm. "I'm so happy you realized that it meant nothing to me when it meant more than anything in the world to me, Luke! I'm _not_ that kind of girl. I'm not that kind of girl who makes love to somebody else the night before her wedding. I don't know what kind of impression you've gotten from me these past 4 years or so, but it doesn't seem like a pretty damn good one." She took a deep breath before continuing. "But just know this, I don't go waltzing around sleeping with anyone I can find as my final plead as a single woman. I'm not that woman and of all people to know that, I thought you'd know that best."

The words made sense to him which of course left him feeling bad. But he didn't know how to defend himself in this situation past what he had already done. He made it clear that it was her shot to take, her decision. He made it clear he wanted to be with her. He made it all clear.

Including the fact that he thought she thought it was a joke.

Bad idea cause now, he didn't have words to defend himself.

"Why did you do it?" He asked.

"What?"

"Why did you come over that night?"

"We were fighting!" She said as if she should have known that, well, because he should have. "I wanted to apologize to you! I wanted to make things better with us before they could get even worse!"

"But why did you want me to kiss you?" He shouted. "Why did you sleep with me that night?"

She looked into his eyes and shook her head to the side. "I wanted to be with you."

"We're you scared?" He asked in general. Scared to marry, scared to be with him, scared to experience this new side of him she's never seen before.

"To death," she said loudly, "but do I regret it? No. Luke, I've been going crazy recently. I don't know what inspired me to come here but I missed you! And I wanted you to come to my party tonight, I know you were invited, Rory told me. I don't know why I thought you'd show. And when I saw you weren't coming, I knew I had to come here because I needed to talk to you since we never did talk about it before I moved away. And now, I don't know what to say. I came here with a completely different plot in my head, different things to say and people to blame but there's a reason these things came out of my mouth instead."

"I let you know I was in Lorelai. It wasn't my choice to make." He said completely avoiding everything else she had said.

It wasn't until then that she realized it was just about all her fault. It wasn't until a solitary tear rolled down her cheek that she realized it really was her fault.

"I know Luke. I know." He couldn't really tell the tears from the rain but he knew she was crying by the sound in her voice.

They spent the next minute or so looking deep into each others eyes, not sure what to say next. They had cleared certain things up, yes, but there was still plenty to say. But there are times when situations are too intense that words can't be spoken. Every possible thing sounds wrong in your head.

There are times you don't know what to say and only actions can speak for you.

She breathed in deeply before approaching him. She kept steady eye contact with him as she walked closer to him and threw herself in his arms. She pressed her lips hard against his, wrapping her arms around his upper half, making him hold her. The power of her body against his almost knocked him off his feet. She pushed her body into his, wanting to be closer than ever to him.

She didn't want to let him go and made sure to see that didn't happen.

The rain was getting in the way of things but it didn't bother them. They spent the next few minutes in that same position before Lorelai opened her mouth and increased their level of kissing. _That_—that—exact feeling rung threw her body again. The same feeling she felt when she was with him before. The feeling only _he_ could give her. The feeling she thought she'd never experience again.

They were too distracted to realize that the rain was coming down harder. When it thundered again, they both snapped out of it. They still remained kissing, but realized where they were and what exactly they were doing, a mere five minutes after what they were last screaming about. But when it thundered, Lorelai realized she couldn't separate herself away from him because she was terrified that he'd think he was making a mistake, being with her again, only this time while she was married. But truth has it; he was just as terrified of letting go as she was.

They tried staying that way as possible but after a good handful of minutes, they knew they had to come to an end sooner or later. At least out here.

Surprisingly, it was Lorelai of the two to pull away first. She quickly separated her face away from his and grabbed a hold of his hands and wrapped them around her waist. She leaned into him, hugging his waist as she pressed her face against his, kissing him quickly. She moved her mouth over to his ear and kissed the side of it.

"Take me upstairs." She whispered, breathlessly.

He kissed the side of her cheek before leading her into the now closed diner. It sure was early to be closing up but she realized the rain—and her party—probably prevented a lot of people from coming in. She held his hand, walking quickly behind him up the stairs to his apartment door. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before walking in with him. But to take the awkwardness of being here yet again, he kissed her as soon as the door was shut. She closed her eyes and tried to relax. She tried to forget about what a horrible wife she was being and most importantly, she tried to ignore the feelings that things might end up the same way as last time and that was the absolute last thing she wanted.

Luke guided her to his bed and lowered her gently down onto it. He leaned his body over her but she pulled him down on top of her and flipped positions so that she was lying on top of him. She wanted to be as close as possible to him and that's what she was going to do. They adjusted themselves against his pillows so they were leaning up a bit more making it easier for the both of them. Luke rubbed her arms slowly before removing her soaking wet coat. It was then that Lorelai noticed how wet they both were.

"Wait." She said pulling away.

Luke's stomach dropped, afraid that she was going to say this was all a mistake. He tried to deny the words soon to come out of her mouth as much as possible. He bit his lip from protesting.

She started stripping off his clothes as quick as possible in attempt to warm the both of them up. He got her clue that she wasn't going any where, just trying to make this more enjoyable for the both of them because right now their freezing cold clothes weren't any help.

It was only seconds till they were stripped down to nothing and situating themselves on the bed. She took one last look at him before closing her eyes and just letting everything go for once.

xx

It was nice to be carefree once in a while.

It was nice not worrying about one main thing non-stop.

It was nice giving things a rest for a while so she could enjoy something else.

She cuddled close to his body as his arms were tightly wrapped around her, pulling her in closer to him. She had her head rested against his chest, enjoying the impromptu kisses on the top of her head. She looked up at him and smiled, kissing him softly on the cheek.

"Hi." She whispered, still smiling.

He was glowing. Or gloating. Or maybe it was both. But whatever the hell it was, she loved it.

"Hi back." He said quietly.

"Still cold?" She asked.

He shook his head and tightened his grip around her a little bit more.

"Are you?"

"I think I'm about right." She said grinning up at him.

She turned her head and glanced at the clock. It was almost 10:00. It wasn't that late but it was late enough for her to be getting tired. She closed her eyes and buried her face in his neck.

"I'm tired." She mumbled.

"Go to sleep." He said rubbing her back.

She was already headed down that road. Her eyes already closing on her, but she wanted to tell him something before she fell dead asleep.

"I'll be here in the morning, Luke." She whispered.

He closed his eyes and sighed peacefully.

"I promise."

With no response back, she quickly drifted off into sleep right in his arms.

xx

It was probably the best night of sleep she's gotten since _the night_ before her wedding. She spent the whole night in that same position, wrapped in his arms.

She opened her eyes slowly, preventing herself from being blinded by the sun. She moved only her head to see if Luke was up but he was still soundly sleeping. It wasn't going to be like last time though. She wasn't going to wait over a month to see him wake up.

She sat there for over 30 minutes watching him sleep, filling her head with thoughts about what would happen next. She never really figured that out. She had an idea, a plot, as to what she wanted to happen. She knew she had it all laid out but it was making it happen, making it work, that was what she needed to figure out.

She was getting anxious waiting for him to wake up. She had been waiting over a half an hour and realized…she had no idea what time it actually was. She glanced at the clock, it was 11 am. It had been over 12 hours since she went 'missing' last night. She just realized that she never called last night and they were all probably worried about her.

But then she looked at Luke and suddenly everything seemed okay, except for the pang of excitement in her side. She kissed his neck a few times in attempt to wake him up but clearly it took more than that.

"Luke." She said quietly, shaking him awake. "Wake up, Luke."

Slowly, he began opening his eyes, trying as hard as possible to avoid the sunlight just like she did.

"Morning sleeping beauty." She said giggling a bit.

"Mmm," he moaned and kissed the top of her head, beginning to wake himself up even more so, "morning."

"Sleep well?" She asked. She sat up and straddled her arms on either side of his chest, lowering her upper half against his.

"Better than well." He stretched his arms over his head and grinned to himself, loving the fact that she was still there.

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"It's 11:00."

"What?" He shot up in bed.

"It's…"

"The diner's supposed to open at 6!" He explained.

"Don't…don't worry about it." She said slowly, trying to get him to lie back down.

"I'm sure every lunatic of Stars Hollow is lined up in front of the diner right now."

"Not to worry my dear, I got everything taken care of." She said putting her finger to his mouth, trying to hush him up.

"What do you mean?" He said removing her hand and holding it in his.

"I called Caesar this morning. I asked him to let everybody know that the diner wouldn't be open till this afternoon. He came here this morning and put a sign up on the door."

He smiled genuinely at her. "Thank you."

"It was my pleasure."

They both new their conditions were awkward. They both understood the circumstances they had both put themselves in yet again but this time it was different. This time something better was going to happen.

"I should probably start getting things ready for today." He said, not wanting to.

She grumbled upon realizing her time was probably up. For today at least.

"I should get going."

"Uh, yeah, sure."

They both glanced at each other, a confident smile in tact. They got out of bed simultaneously and both got ready to do their own things.

They slowly got their acts together; Luke made her something for breakfast before she left while she took a shower.

xx

"So I should probably get going, huh?"

Luke wiped his hands on the sides of his pants, adjusting his baseball hat afterwards. "Yeah, well…"

"I should get home already, I'm sure people are…"

"Yeah, I understand…"

Everything was extremely awkward between the two of them. But for some reason, neither was mad at each other. Neither wanted to make this any weirder than it already was so that's how it was going besides just being awkward around each other.

"Come here." She wagged a finger at him and stepped closer to him. She wrapped one arm around his waist, one around his shoulders. "We will talk." She said confidently. She kissed him quickly. "You know," she mumbled against his lips, "Luke, we'll…we will figure something out."

He wrapped his arms around her and remembered their conversation from the night before.

He kissed her back passionately before responding. "I know."

"Have a good day, okay?"

"Back atcha."

She smiled and backed up towards the door still staring at him. "See you later."

He smiled and waved before she walked out of the door.

_One day at a time,_ they both thought. _One day at a time._

xx

The whole ride home Lorelai was gloating like a little girl. She never once thought about what she was going to do or say when she actually got home but for some reason, that wasn't what she cared about right now. The only thing she cared about and was currently thinking about was when the next time she'd see Luke again.

She pulled into the driveway behind Max's car. It suddenly hit her that she had to face him right now. And it was bad…because, she didn't know what she was going to say. Suddenly, guilty feelings took over her again and she didn't have the slightest idea how she was going to get out of this.

She slowly got out of the car and walked up to the stairs, searching for her keys inside her messy purse. By the time she had found them, Max had already swung the door open to greet her.

"There you are!" He practically shouted before taking her inside the house. "Where on earth have you been?" He sure wanted his answers, she thought.

Crap, she should have thought about this before. She knew something like this would come up but she still didn't have an excuse ready.

"Lorelai?" He asked, trying to get her to snap out of it.

Lorelai shook her head and tried to explain but nothing came out.

"I was starting to get really worried about you. I told Rory you just stepped out and sent her back with Lane so she didn't have to worry about you."

"Thanks." She said weakly.

"Where were you, Lorelai?" He asked a bit more seriousness in his voice.

"I…"

"You? You left your own party and didn't show up again. I had no idea where you were. I tried calling your cell phone but it was off."

"I'm sorry Max." She said quietly, trying to avoid eye contact with him.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, grabbing her hand and pulling her closer to him.

She tried to keep her distance. Yes, she had showered. But she still felt like somehow he could smell some sort of guilt on her.

"Everything's fine. I just…something came up."

"Well what happened?" He asked, curious to know where his wife was.

"I had to help a friend out with something." She blurted. It was just the first thing she could think of though.

"Who?" He asked confused. "All your friends were here at the party."

"That's not true." She said getting offended for no reason. She started walking into the kitchen hoping a fresh pot of coffee would be sitting there looking all pretty for her.

"Well you're not giving me much to base my assumptions off of."

"Well, don't assume." She rubbed her head in slow motion.

"I think I'm being pretty mature about this." He said starting to get upset. "You just left last night and I had no idea where you went. I'm not going to ask you questions. I can tell you don't want to share your answers with me but it didn't hurt to ask."

"No, it didn't." She looked up and him and smiled softly. He really was being understanding about the whole situation. Way too understanding if you asked her.

Of course he was going to be understanding about it though, he's Max after all. Absolutely crazy about her, he wouldn't dare jump on her nerves when he knew she didn't want to be bugged. She felt guilty yet again, for being so horrible to somebody who was so great to her. But, she just couldn't put forth with him. She couldn't be honest about it either because honesty equals truth and she still hadn't gained that confidence.

"Hey come here." Max walked over to her and she kissed him on the cheek. "I'm sorry. I just had to help a friend out with something, that's all. I should have called, it was wrong that I didn't but my phone died and…I was just, helping a friend."

She felt awfully repetitive but she hadn't planned some perfect plot as to why she was out. She probably should have thought about that before but she didn't have the time to think or worry. She had Luke to think about instead and that's exactly who she was thinking about on her way home instead of thinking of a golden excuse.

The rest of the day was okay. They had cleared things up without her actually explaining where she was. He wasn't going to ask questions though he had a million. But he knew better than that and if she didn't want to tell him, he wasn't going to ask.

They spent the day working on things around the house. Rory was at Lane's for most of the day so it was just the two of them. But truth has it, the whole day her mind was on Luke and how she wanted to see him. She didn't want to be home right now, cleaning up the living room with Max despite how filthy it was. She wanted to go back to Luke's and think of something, anything, to make these conditions they were in okay.

And as great and amazing as that sounded, it was completely unrealistic.

xxx

The next day, Max had a meeting most of the day. Rory was out with Dean for the day because they hadn't spent some alone time in a while so the house was left alone to Lorelai once again.

She had been thinking about going to see Luke. She thought to herself, why not? They ended out on good terms so there shouldn't be anything 'between' them. She looked at the clock; it was already almost 7:00. Rory probably wouldn't be home until at least 10 and Max was supposed to be out until around then as well.

After planning out a small pro-con list in her head, she grabbed her keys and headed out the door, driving in the direction of the diner.

Because of the traffic, it took her almost 40 minutes to get there. She parked in her old spot which wasn't being taken by an actual citizen of Stars Hollow.

She had to admit it; it was great being back in the Hollow. It was absolutely nothing like Hartford. Hartford isn't homey and small, where you can borrow a cup of sugar from just about anyone. It was more high class and business related. Huge corporate offices and rich private schools dominated the town. Not friendly diners and dance studios. And to be honest, she really did hate Hartford. She'd pick living in Stars Hollow any day of the year for as long as she lived. It just wasn't the same there. Hartford reminded her way to much of her childhood, which half the time she didn't even want to remember.

She crossed the street and walked up the stairs in front of the diner. She got nervous when she saw Luke taking an order from somebody at the counter. But she figured since they were in the public eye, they were going to have to act normal. At least as normal as possible. She casually walked in and he looked up right as she walked in. They both smiled slightly at each other as she walked up to him and approached him at the counter.

"Luke." She cooed.

"Hey." He smiled grabbing a cup of coffee and pouring her a cup.

"How are you?" She asked casually.

"Not to bad. How about yourself?"

She liked that they were normal. But she felt they were being too normal with each other and she had just gotten there. She just hoped that they weren't back to normal because despite how wrong and messed up everything was, she still wanted there to be something with them.

"I'm good." She took a sip of the coffee and made steady eye contact with him while she took her first sip. "Still good as always. I see you haven't lost your touch." She said, laughing to herself because she realized that sounded a little bit more different than intended.

"No, I haven't." He said seriously.

She grinned and took another sip.

"So things are good?" She said somewhat quietly.

"Things are good. How are things in…Hartford?" He said sort of uncomfortably.

"They're fine." She said in all honesty. They weren't good, they weren't bad. They were just…fine.

"Good, good."

They didn't really know _what_ to say. She knew one thing though; she wanted to be alone with him right now. She wanted to go upstairs and have him to herself, to talk to him, to be with him, just…not down here with everybody watching. Because personally, the people just made it even more awkward.

"Excuse me; can I get some more coffee?" A customer in the back asked.

He broke her eye contact and grabbed the coffee pot.

"Me too, please." Another customer called out.

"Hey, why don't you take your stuff upstairs? I'll meet you there in a few minutes."

She grinned, appreciating the fact that he was trying to make this easier on the both of them. She grabbed her cup of coffee and walked up the stairs to his apartment.

She opened the door and looked around. Still looked the same as the other day. Not like she expected it to change or anything. She took a seat on the couch and rested her coffee on the table, waiting for Luke to come upstairs and join her.

It only took him a few minutes before he was able to leave the diner and come upstairs. He walked in with his hands in his back pockets, smiling nervously as he approached her on the couch.

"Sorry about that, small little rush." He explained.

"Don't worry about it."

He nodded his head and took in the awkward silence.

"So, what brings you out here?" He asked.

She turned around to face him and bit her lip nervously. "Wanted to see how you were doing." She said honestly. "You're good?"

"I'm good. You're good?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Well, now that we've gotten that figured out." He said slyly.

"Can you get off for the night?" She blurted.

"Me?"

"No, the other backwards baseball hat, flannel shirt wearing man in back of you. Yes, you."

"Don't you have to…?"

"Everyone's out for tonight. I've got a few hours to spare before I should probably go home."

"Yeah, well, uh…let me go tell Caesar."

"Okay."

Luke went down the stairs to clear up everything with Caesar. Since the diner was pretty dead, he trusted Caesar with the diner and told him to come upstairs if he needed anything.

By the time Luke had gotten back into the apartment, Lorelai was just sitting down, remote in hand.

"Perfect timing. The movies just about to start."

"The what?"

"Movie. I went digging threw your collection and put in the first appealing thing I saw."

Luke turned out the lights before walking back over to the couch and sitting next to her just as the opening credits came across the screen.

The movie started out fine. They sat close to each other but not nearly close enough. Lorelai wasn't paying attention much. Her mind was on other things. Things about Luke. Dirty things about Luke. Things she shouldn't be thinking about at all but she was and couldn't help it.

She wanted him to touch her. It seemed like he was a thousand feet away from her and there was nothing she could do about it. She watched him from the corner of her eye, curious to see if he would make a move in this lifetime. But the more and more she looked at him, the more and more she got the feeling that nothing was going to happen.

By the time the movie was half way threw already, there still hadn't been any progress. Of course she didn't go to his place to 'get' with him. Because it wasn't just some casual hook-up. It was more than that, something completely special and it only happened with him. She reached out her hand into the center of the couch between where their legs were but he made no recognition of her being there.

She wasn't mad. She couldn't be mad because of that. She should probably be glad that she wouldn't have to go home that night feeling guiltier than she already does. Maybe Luke wanted things to be normal with them until they thought of a solution to their problems. At least that's how he acted.

When the ending credits came on, there was still no progress between them. Lorelai turned the movie off and turned to Luke, smiling.

"Did you enjoy that movie?" She asked.

"Yeah it had been a while since I saw it."

She nodded her head wondering where to take this awkwardness next. She looked at the clock and saw that it was already 9:00.

"I should go." She said quietly. "I've got to get home."

Luke walked over and grabbed her jacket from the chair, helping her into it.

"I'm glad you got to come by." He said.

"Me too. Thanks for taking part of the night off to be with me."

"Of course."

"So…" Lorelai said.

"So…" He repeated.

"I'll see you soon?"

"Yeah, definitely."

"Okay then." With one last smile, she walked out of his apartment and closed the door shut behind her.

_That_ was a little weird.

Certainly not how she imagined their visit to be, especially after the last. She thought about it, trying to figure out how Luke was thinking. She wanted to know what he thought about everything without directly asking him but sometimes it was just way to hard to be able to determine what somebody's thinking. Plus, she knew she'd need lots more information to base her judgments after.

During her drive home, the only thing she could think of was that he was trying to just make it normal for them. And by making it normal, it only led to more and more awkwardness but it would all be okay eventually.

At least they hoped so.

xx

Right as she was pulling in the driveway, Max pulled up right behind her. She got out of the car just as he was getting out of his.

"Fancy meeting you here." She said sarcastically.

"Hey," he gave her a quick kiss, "where were you?"

"Oh you know," of course he didn't know… "I was just out shopping around." Yes, at 9:00 at night, that's exactly where I was.

"No luck in that department, I see." He said referring to her empty hands.

"Yeah, no good sales. What can I say?" She said laughing as they walked into the house.

Lorelai walked over to the phone and saw there was a message. She listened to it and followed Max up into their room.

"That was Rory; she told us Dean would drive her home after they're finished with a movie so we should leave the front door open." Lorelai said.

"Not a problem." He changed out of his suit into his tee-shirt and shorts.

"How was your meeting?"

"Oh, long and tiring. We still haven't come up with an agreement as to what we're going to do with the money."

"You'll figure something out." Lorelai said changing out of her clothes as well.

"Yeah, we will."

As they both got finished getting ready for bed, the both slipped underneath the covers and turned the lights out.

"So you're going to drive with Rory tomorrow?" She asked.

"Yeah, poor girls going to be dead tired if she doesn't get home soon."

Lorelai glanced at the clock noticing that it was only 10:00. "She'll be home soon. She'll be okay. We're prone for staying up late and getting up early. It's yet another something we just win in."

"Don't I know it?" Max said laughing as he leaned over and kissed Lorelai on her lips.

"I love you." He said staring at her.

She smiled guiltily. "Love you too."

She turned over facing away from him because she simply didn't want to have to face him. But of course, he took the time to wrap his arms around her from behind and pull her in close to his body. She wanted nothing more than for him to be on his own side of the bed like he usually is but no…he just insisted to be with her.

It was only about 20 minutes until she could tell that he was fully asleep. He was still wrapped around her and she still wanted to get out of his grasp. She sighed loudly, rolling her eyes as she turned her head back to make sure he was absolutely sleeping.

Luckily he was a pretty dead sleeper. Once he was out, it took some convincing to get him out of bed. She lightened his grasp around her and slipped out of his embrace, getting out of bed and sneaking out with the phone. She walked downstairs and sat on Rory's bed in her room. She closed the door, leaving it cracked a little bit and kept the lights off. She sat on the bed and pulled out the phone, dialing a familiar number.

The phone rang about 4 times before he answered.

"Hello?" He sounded sleepy, probably because she just woke up him up.

"Luke?"

"Lorelai?"

"Yeah, it's me." She said quietly.

"What's the matter? Is everything okay?" He asked concerned.

"Yeah, I guess." She said unconfidently.

"Why are you calling, Lorelai?" He asked, still unsure.

"Thanks for hanging out with me tonight." She said considerately.

"Uh, no problem." He responded, confused.

"Did you have fun?" She whispered.

"Of course I did."

"Good, good…so did I."

"Well, that's good. Listen Lorelai, I've gotta--"

"Luke, I wanted…well, I want to be with you. I need to be with you when we're together."

She didn't realize until afterwards how awkward that must have been…for both of them. She waited for some sort of response from him but so far, all she was getting was silence.

"But you're…"

"I know. But I want y—it just feels right when we're together."

"But…"

"Can I see you tomorrow? During the afternoon?"

"Yeah, I guess that's fine." He said.

"Perfect. Sorry if I woke you up tonight."

"It's okay."

They were both quiet for a second before Lorelai spoke again. "Goodnight."

"Hey Lorelai?" He asked.

"Yes?"

"I know how you feel." He said honestly. "I feel the same way."

She smiled into the phone.

"I just thought you'd like to know that."

"I did." She said nodding her head though of course he couldn't see that. "Bye."

"See you later, Lorelai."

xx

"_I know. But I want y—it just feels right when we're together."_ Rory repeated in her mind. Who on the face of this earth was her mother talking too? She started brainstorming but realized she better make it known she was here before her mother walked out on her eavesdropping.

She opened the door and glanced at her mom sitting on her bed in the dark.

"Who was that?" Rory asked right away.

Lorelai practically jumped off her bed. "Oh my god, Rory, you're home."

"Yeah, I heard part of your conversation just now…I take it that wasn't Sookie…" She said leading onto something.

Lorelai's heart began racing, wondering how much Rory actually heard. She couldn't ask her though unless she wanted to make it even more weird and obvious that she was talking to somebody she probably shouldn't have been talking to.

She got up and gave Rory a kiss on her forehead. "Don't worry about it, babe. Did you have a good time with Dean?"

Rory looked at her mother skeptically before answering. "Yeah it was good."

"Alright well get some sleep. You've got sleep tomorrow."

"Night mom."

"Night sweets."

xx

It was near 1:00 when she was on her way to town. She didn't call Luke and notify him that she was coming. She figured she didn't need to. She warned him last night so that should be good enough, she figured.

She pulled into the parking spot, fixed her hair, and then hoped out of the car. She bounced her way up the stairs and at sight of Luke, her legs almost melted. After her phone call with him last night, she was ready to show him what she wants.

She walked into the diner and by the second they made eye contact, Lorelai averted her eyes to the staircase. She walked right past all the customers and walked straight up the stairs, Luke following right behind her.

As soon as he walked in the door and shut it behind him, she was already all over him. She pressed him against the door, attacking him with her mouth and body. She pressed herself against him and made him hold her again. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Lorelai cut to the chase and practically ripped his clothes off. He was taken aback, but didn't expect anything less than this, coming from Lorelai Gilmore. He couldn't help but smile threw a kiss while she fumbled with the buttons on his jeans.

They walked over to the couch, still joined together at the lips, neither one parting for a second. Lorelai pushed him against the couch and straddled his lap while he worked on throwing her shirt over her head.

When clothes were too a minimum, she pushed him down so he was lying down and rested her wait on top of him.

xx

It wasn't _supposed_ to happen like that. But after the night before, sexual tension was buzzing threw the both of them. So it wasn't a mistake, they both new that. It just wasn't supposed to happen that way but neither was complaining.

They didn't complain when they got re-dressed, walked down the stairs into the diner, or when she walked out of the door. Only a handful of words were shared during their time together just then but Lorelai figured they could both live with that.

But when she got in the car and drove off, she realized she didn't know where to go. She needed to talk to somebody, somebody that new her well, somebody that would tell her that this whole thing she was doing was completely unlike her.

She turned at the light and headed straight to the Independence Inn.

xx

It only took her 5 minutes to get there. As soon as she walked in, she sped past Michel who didn't even notice she walked in. She walked into the kitchen to find Sookie stirring some conjunction on the stove.

"Sook, office, now."

Sure it was no longer _her_ office, but it was a office and she knew she was still welcome just about anywhere in that place.

"Lorelai? What's the matter?" Sookie said trailing behind her.

As soon as they got into the office, Lorelai pointed to one of the seats. "Sit." She directed.

"Honey is everything okay?" Sookie asked concerned.

"Sookie," Lorelai took a deep breath, "I need you to listen to what I'm about to tell you. And I don't want to hear a word of a response from you. I don't know if I'm ready to hear what other people have to say but I just need to tell somebody and I figured you were the only one I could tell and want to tell."

"Are you sure something isn't wrong?"

"Sookie I think I'm having an affair." She blurted.

An affair. Yes, that's what it could be called.

"You're _what?_" Sookie shrieked.

"I said I think I'm having an affair."

"You…Lorelai, you…with _who?_" She finally managed to get out.

"Luke." She said quickly.

Sookies jaw dropped to the floor. Her eyes widened and focused in on Lorelai. "You…you…you're having an affair with L-Luke!" She asked utterly surprised.

"No comments Sookie."

She 'zipped' her mouth shut and waved a hand for her to continue talking.

"I mean, I don't know." Lorelai began, pacing back and forth. "I was with him, Sookie, the day before my wedding. That was our first time being together. And then, we didn't really talk until I told him I was moving. When I told him that, he took it really hard. We hung out together everyday for the last week but nothing ever happened. Then during my party the other night, I just couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to confront him, to yell at him for making me feel so guilty. I wanted to blame him so badly, but I realized it wasn't his fault. And we ended up staying together that night as well."

Sookies mouth dropped even more so.

"So we made up and when I hung out with him last night, nothing happened. And, I mean, I was so confused. I didn't necessarily think something was going to happen but I thought maybe, just maybe a_ little_ something would happen. But nothing did. So I called him last night and told him I needed to be with him when were together."

"You--"

"Not a peep." She reminded her.

"And right now? I just came from there and I completely just took advantage of him! He was just…there! So I took him upstairs and we had sex. Just now. For the third time. But I don't think the other two times count as "sex" but it doesn't matter does it! It's still something I shouldn't be having and I am. And for gods sake, Sookie I'm married! I'm still a newlywed and I've already cheated on my husband of nearly 2 months _three_ times, sexually, with my best friend of 4 years! That can't be right."

She continued her pacing back and forth, watching Sookie's face practically explode with emotions. She wanted to say something so bad but she new she couldn't.

"There's so much more to the story Sookie." She said in a more calm voice. "I mean, I love being with him. I feel so…special when I'm with him and I know that sounds horrible but there are something's I just can't help but feel, you know? I don't know why I'm asking you these questions or even telling you any of this since I won't let you talk but that doesn't stop me from doing it anyways. I guess I just wanted to tell you these things. I needed to get it off my chest so there, I did. And maybe one day…pretty soon, I will let you tell me what you think."

Sookie nodded her head, clearly enjoying that idea.

"But until then, I've gotta go."

And with that, Lorelai practically bolted out the door. Sookie unclasped her hand and shouted wait but they didn't hear her.

xx

The next night, Max and Lorelai were out to dinner. They had been talking about going out for a few nights now and with Rory doing something for the newspaper until around 8, they thought tonight would be a great night to do.

"So, I've been thinking." Lorelai said, stabbing her salad.

"And?"

"I'm going to take this business class. It's on Tuesdays and Thursdays but this weekend, there's actually some type of seminar and it's an overnight thing in New Haven but it should be fun and worth it."

"I think that's great. I know you haven't had the best of times alone in the house recently…"

"No, I haven't."

"So I think that would be great if you took the class."

"I do too." She said smiling. "I really think it'll be nice."

xx

Saturday night rolled around quicker than she imagined. She had made plans with Luke to come to his apartment and stay with him during the weekend because of her "seminar." She thought it would be nice to spend some one on one time with him so she arranged it according to his schedule.

She told Max and Rory she'd be home late on Sunday. Maybe Monday morning, depending what time everybody else in the class would be leaving. She packed an over night bag and headed to Luke's around 8:00 and ate late dinner with him upstairs followed by some other activities for the too of them…

xx

Breathless, he rolled off of Lorelai and she laughed at the feeling of lightness after he removed himself from hovering over her.

"I'm glad you decided to stay here this weekend." Luke said, kissing her on her arm.

"Me too." She smiled.

He worked his way up from her arm to her chest, kissing her in the places he knew she loved.

"You're staying here tomorrow night also?"

"That's the plan." She said laughing because he was tickling her slightly. He kissed along her neck, back up to her chin, and up to her lips.

He kissed her and went back to her neck for a few more minutes.

_Ring, ring._ _Ring, ring._

Lorelai's heart stopped for a second because the noise just about scared her half to death. She grabbed her cell phone on the side of the bed, swatting at Luke to stop kissing her because she was probably going to laugh on the phone.

"Move!" She insisted, grabbing the phone and opening it up.

"Hello? Oh hey, how are you?" She swatted Luke one more time but he kept kissing her neck. "It's going great, thanks…no I'm actually going to bed soon…yeah…I know…you too…soon enough though…" she sat up in bed and leaned against the backboard. "I know…sure of course…thanks for calling…you too…bye."

She hung up the phone and looked down at Luke who was smiling like a fool. She had a seldom sort of look on her face, very serious and poised.

"That was Max."

Oops.

* * *

Thanks for reading:) Please review! xoxo


	5. Changing Wheels

**Who Lies Beneath?**

**Disclaimer:** After all this time, I still own zilch.

**Summary:** LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistakes before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

**Authors Note: **Finally, back in action! Huge sorry's for the tremendously long wait! I couldn't get started with the chapter and then school was being a big pain in the arse but luckily, we're proud to hand you chapter 5. Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the wonderful feedback! You guys are all super sweet and every review means something! ;)

Special thanks to **Annick** for never shutting up ;) JK you know you rock. And to **Heather** for all the encouragement (and the little boost for the one scene!) and everyone at **FF** who's been asking lately. Sorry for making you all wait so long!

The two or three italic lines in the beginning are from the song Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap.

And to little miss...hebrew over there, I can't wait for _your_ story. cough-cough. xoxo.

Ah, note the rating has been changed just in case.

Enjoy and review:)

* * *

**Where We Left Off-**

_"Hello? Oh hey, how are you?" She swatted Luke one more time but he kept kissing her neck. "It's going great, thanks…no I'm actually going to bed soon…yeah…I know…you too…soon enough though…" she sat up in bed and leaned against the backboard. "I know...sure of course…thanks for calling…you too…bye." _

She hung up the phone and looked down at Luke who was smiling like a fool. She has a seldom sort of look on her face, very serious and poised.

"That was Max."

Oops.

The clearness of Luke's blue eyes dimmed below her face. Mere minutes ago, they were happily together, not a care in the world.

Possibly, one of the things that worked about this was that: When they were together, they didn't think about their problem. They didn't have switches going on and off in their heads, brainstorming for the best solution out there.

It wasn't as if they didn't care. Because they certainly did. But the fact that they felt so at ease and comfortable with each other is probably a good portion of the reason why they kept doing what they had been doing.

_Where are we, what the hell is going on._

But as she looked down into his now saddened eyes, she bit her bottom lip, looking aimlessly above her to the ceiling.

To the ceiling where she thought her answer was floating. Aimlessly around somewhere she couldn't quite grasp. As close as the answer to all their problems was, it was too high.  
And simply, she was too short.

She looked down to him and watched him roll off of her and adjust himself on the other side of the bed. He tried getting away from her, his mind now turning on. Subsiding in his mind was the ticking of the clock, letting him know that he was running out of time.

_The dust has only just began to fall, crop circles in the carpet._

Yes, it had been ticking since the day he first made love to her. But now it was getting louder and more sudden. He knew they couldn't play these games.

He knew what he wanted. And he had a pretty good idea as to what she wanted. But it wasn't his choice to make.

It seemed like enough before.

Anything was enough with Lorelai. Being best friends was a pure privilege. Their friendship was something only a handful of lucky people shared. But suddenly, it dawned on him that there is potential he could have more than enough. For now, he was just settling for mediocre.

He had her right now, not Max. Sure she was legally married to Max. But up until now, that didn't mean Max and Lorelai shared something more important. He always thought he had her. But suddenly, he slowly started realizing: he didn't have her and he didn't have enough. He needed all of her, or absolutely nothing from her.

And he thought it was time he let her know that.

Just then, Lorelai lowered herself flat onto the bed. She closed her eyes and sighed deeply into the air. Eyes still closed, she rolled over to Luke, tangling her legs within his. She wrapped one arm around his waist and turned on her stomach, partially lying on top of him. She kept her face tucked into his neck, kissing him softly ever so often.

The feeling of her body over his was completely intoxicating.

He would let her know how he felt sooner or later.

For now, he just had to think.

She breathed in his pungent scent, smiling into his neck because she knew _that_ was Luke. She could tell he was hurt when she told him Max called and she honestly could not blame him. She wasn't going to try even, which is why she kept her mouth shut and positioned herself as close as possible to him.

She felt protected in his arms. Safe. She knew that for this moment, she had Luke to be with her. He was her prize from all these hectic, crazy _games _they were playing. And she was going to hang on to him as long as she could before driving herself nuts with feeling sorry for Luke. And Max for that matter. Cause neither of them deserved this.

He listened to her breathing, noticing when exactly it was that she was asleep. He stayed still beneath her, one hand against the small of her back supporting her, the other tangled in her hair on the back of her head. Her lips were pressed against his neck and he felt her steady breathing hit his skin, each time more arousing than the next.

Mixed feelings ran through his head.

Wake her up, look at her, touch her, explore her, make love to her, tell her you want to stay.

Tell her you'll be there.

Keep her there, quiet and peaceful. Move her, whisper to her you want out.

Tell her you can't play these games any longer.

Games they are not, though. They are way more important than games. Games are fun and whimsical. This isn't fun and this certainly isn't whimsical. This is serious, and passionate, and every button in his body wants to be pushed right now. He wants this calling to never end. He wants to be with her forever.

He wants to let her go.

A whirlwind of thoughts clogged his mind. He thought of a time this had happened before. Sure he had never been in this exact situation before, but there was a similar time he was equally as confused, just not with as much importance.

There was one particular time he thought growing up without his father instead of his mother would come in handy cause clearly, his father lacked to inform him never to mess with two best friends.

His mom would have told him what to do. But his mom wasn't there.

_"I don't want to hurt either of their feelings." Luke said sitting on the chair beside his father. _

"You'll figure it out. You just have to think about it. It'll take some time, Lucas." He said not even looking up from the newspaper.

"This happened with you before…what did you decide?"

"I decided to go for a walk. I tried going fishing but ended up in the lake because they say water relaxes your mind."

"So why didn't you take a shower?"

"I had fishing on the mind, Luke." His father said flatly.

Luke got up from his seat, hands in his jean pockets, looking up at his father.

"Where are you going?" His father asked.

"To the lake."

_"To fish?" He asked, looking up from his paper this time._

_"To swim." _

And with that, Luke walked out the door and went straight to the Lake. He swam for nearly 2 hours before going back to his house for dinner that night.

He got home and failed to mention to his father that it worked. And he had figured out all of his girl dramas within the two-hour capacity.

Lorelai squirmed against his body, loosening her grip and letting her legs fall out of his. He took the advantage of her loose estate and quietly—but very still—slipped the rest of her warm body off of his and crept out of the bed ever so quietly. He changed into his boxers, jeans, grey tee shirt and green coat because this time around, it was actually cold outside.

He walked out of his apartment, closing the door but still leaving a crack, and walked down the stairs and out the door.

It only took him a matter of minutes to get to his destination. He appreciated that about Stars Hollow. Everything is 2 minutes away from everything else. Annoying sometimes? Yes. But helpful other times? Definitely.

xx.

It didn't take long before Lorelai realized she was sleeping alone. Her body hadn't adjusted to the cold air flooding in under the blankets. She pulled them up to her neck and opened her eyes slowly, looking around the apartment.

The light in the hallway streamed through the crack of the door. That wasn't on before, she realized. She averted her eyes to the bathroom, assuming Luke had to use it for a moment. But the door was wide open, lights all shut off.

She stayed in bed a good 10 minutes before getting really curious. Maybe he was downstairs? Yes, he was downstairs and would be back any minute to fall back asleep with me wrapped in his arms, she convinced herself.

But after 10 more minutes of waiting and still no Luke, she started to worry. She slowly got up from the bed, walking over to Luke's drawers and grabbing a pair of his sweat pants and a long sleeve thermal shirt. She walked to the hook and grabbed her coat, putting it on before  
walking out the door.

She walked into the diner and called his name out loud. "Luke?" She peeked in the kitchen and storeroom before realizing he wasn't there. She went to the door and opened it, noting that she didn't have to unlock it.

He was definitely out there somewhere, she thought. The only question now was: where? It was late. He couldn't be just anywhere.

She walked around the block to the back where his truck was parked. Wherever he went, it was walking distance from here. She walked across the street to the gazebo but he certainly wasn't there. She walked past Miss Patty's dance studio, past all the local stores, wandering aimlessly like an idiot.

She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk trying to think really hard where he could be. There was one place she thought of. Fishing.

Besides the fact that it was just about freezing out, there was still a possibility he was fishing because after all, it hadn't snowed yet and the lake hadn't frozen over. She walked a few blocks till she got to the fishing lake.

As she walked closer and closer to the water, she heard noises coming from the area. She looked around and saw no one on the edge fishing. She saw no poles, no bait, no kits, nothing. All she saw was a shirt, pair of pants, and shoes but she didn't see anybody.

It only took a minute or so before he appeared in her sight and gave her nearly a heart attack.

"Luke!" She said, screaming louder than intended. "You scared me half to death."

He fixed his hair now in his face and walked closer to the edge of the water. "Sorry." He said quietly.

She crouched down low, dipping her hand in the water. "It's freezing. Why are you swimming at…" she looked at his pile of clothes and saw his watch resting on top of it, "almost 2 am? Not to mention in what's soon to be called winter."

He took a few minutes, gathering his general thoughts before speaking again. "I needed to get out of there; I had some things on my mind." He said casually.

"Yes but at 2 am? It couldn't wait until tomorrow?"

"Probably. But it was on my mind now." He said, acting as if she was supposed to understand everything he was saying so far.

"So…you think you're coming back anytime soon?" She asked with a hint of hope in her voice because she knew this was unlike him.

He turned around and looked up at the starry sky. "It's a nice night." He said completely ignoring her previous question.

"I'm sure you're freezing. And you don't even have a towel."

He wrapped his arms around himself, showing her that he was cold yet still denying it. "It's nice."

"Is it really?" She asked, taking off her shoes.

"Yeah."

"Good."

She took off her coat and threw it some place near his clothes. She placed her hands at the bottom of her shirt and lifted it over her head quickly.

"What are you doing?" He asked nervously.

She took her sweat pants off and threw them near her shirt and coat.

"I'm getting in with you." She stated simply.

"Lorelai don't. You could get sick." He said, trying to get her to back out. After all, it wasn't exactly warm. Far from it, to be honest.

"Great then we'll get sick together." She said running into the water, jumping in and making a small splash.

She raised herself up from underneath the water with a small shriek. "Luke its freezing!"

He couldn't help but smile as she walked her way over to him. He was in the deeper end of the lake so she trailed after him.

"What on earth inspired you to go swimming in this freezing cold water at 2 am?" Her teeth were chattering as she wrapped her arms tightly around herself, still following after him.

Luke kept going deeper and deeper into the water, leaving Lorelai left to follow him.

"You're insane, you know that?" She questioned.

"Hey, nobody forced you in here."

She rolled her eyes and finally caught up to Luke who was treading water in the deep area. She grabbed a hold of his hands and tried steadying her balance on him. He could still stand but she was having a little more trouble.

She took his hands and made him wrap them around her waist. She kept her hands on top of his, around her back and pushed her body into his.

"Aren't you cold?" She asked quietly, pressing her forehead against his.

He tried looking somewhere else besides her electrifying blue eyes, which still stood out in the dark. He took one hand off from around her waist and grazed her cheek softly.

"Not really. I got used to it."

She took her hands off of his and wrapped them around his neck, dangling in his arms.

They stayed quiet for a moment, both enjoying the quietness. Lorelai closed her eyes while she continued resting her head against his.

She kept her eyes closed, moving her lips towards his ear.

"What's the matter Luke?" She whispered into his ear.

Luckily her positioning was making it easier for him. He couldn't look into her eyes at this very moment.

"Talk to me." She pleaded.

But he didn't know what to say right now. He thought perhaps it would be easier to have this conversation somewhere dry. Somewhere a little more heated. And somewhere where Lorelai's body wasn't pressed hard against his.

He pulled away from her, slowly allowing her to grasp the water on her own. He turned around, facing away from her.

"I don't think this is the best place to talk about it." He said flatly.

"Then we can go somewhere else." She insisted.

"I don't know." He mumbled.

She stayed away from him a good few minutes before getting frustrated.

They talked about things. They figured out things easily, and right now he was being nothing but complicated.

"Luke." She said softly. She swam over to him and turned his body around to face her. She wrapped one leg tightly around his waist and wrapped her arms around his upper chest.

He held her, but still could not look into her eyes.

"Look at me." She insisted.

But he kept his eyes balanced where they were, right by her neck. He knew he was going to make a mistake in a matter of seconds.

"Luke?"

"We can't do this anymore." He said quickly.

Her eyes tried not to open _too_ wide. Taken back, she swallowed hard and made Luke look at her.

"Oh?" She chocked out.

This was the last thing she expected to happen here, now. Sure, sometime she knew that they were going to have to end but she didn't expect it to be now, at 2 am, in a freezing cold lake with no explanations.

"Why?" She questioned quickly. She took back saying that moments after realizing how stupid that sounded. "Nevermind, don't answer that."

"Lorelai." He said softly, grazing her arm which she jerked away slightly.

Quickly, a small tear rolled down her cheek but she was careful not to show him. He took her chin in his hand and now forced her to look at him.

"I understand." She said, biting her lip.

"This is so hard to do, Lorelai."

"I understand." She repeated.

She was quiet for a few minutes, trying to understand that they were coming to an end. They, as a couple, were ending. Yes she considered them together, happily together for that matter. But they were together under the total wrong circumstances.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked.

"I'm thinking about wanting to tell you to stay with me."

He sighed quietly, looking down into the water as well.

"But I'm also thinking about how selfish that would be."

He looked up at her, grabbing her attention with his eyes. "I don't want to stop being with you, Lorelai. But…it's beginning to be too hard. It's not as easy as I thought it would be, it's way more than what I thought we'd have. I can't…I can't be with you knowing you aren't mine."

"But I am yours." She pleaded, almost begging.

He gave her a look that secretly screamed the word Max.

"What now?" She asked.

"I don't know. I guess we'll have to figure something out but…I just really don't think we can continue this. Not under these circumstances at least."

She nodded her head and stuck her whole body into the mind numbing cold water, swimming back to the bridge.

Luke followed after her, saddened that things were going to end this way. He wanted to tell her that he wants her to choose: him or Max. But he couldn't put her through something like that, at least not now. He knew he was forward and down to the point but that's the way he had to do it. In the long run, he knew it wouldn't hurt him or her as much.

"We should get back though. We're both soaked." He said as she got out of the lake and grabbed her clothes from the ground. She put her flip-flops on and two seconds into their walk, the water on the shoe caused her to slip and break the thong of her shoe.

"Shit." She mumbled. Luke stopped walking and examined her shoe. She picked up and showed him. "Don't have any glue on you, do ya?" She asked hopefully.

Luke patted his boxers, the only thing that he was wearing because his shirt was soaked as well. "Sorry."

She started walking, hoping the gravel wouldn't hurt her foot too much but every time she stepped with her left foot a quiet curse word came flying out of her mouth.

Luke slowed down and bent down, motioning for her to jump on his back. With zero objections, and zero words said, she climbed on his back and he walked them towards the center of town.

She tried not to press her body against his, if that was possible. She hung her arms loosely around his neck and kept her upper half a safe distance from his back.

"You know," she said quietly, "if somebody saw us right now--they'd think we're insane."

He lifted her up a little bit more and nodded his head. "Probably."

The walk was only a matter of minutes. Luke carried her all the way up the door of his apartment and set her down as he opened the door. They both walked in, not bothering to turn the light on.

"Come here." He led her into the bathroom and turned the hot water on. "Take a shower; it'll help warm you up."

She looked over and touched his hand softly, smiling sadly. "Thanks." He walked away from the bathroom and closed the door while she took her clothes off and jumped in to the shower.

She got in and rinsed her hair under the water.

_"I don't have lots of time before I have to get home." She giggled, walking into the bathroom pulling him by his shirt._

_"And I don't have a lot of time before I've got to open the diner."_

She massaged her head which was now pounding.

_"We can eliminate the process of two showers and take…" she turned on the water and removed her shirt quickly, "…one."_

She thought about what had happened. What he had said. She thought about telling him she doesn't think she can imagine life without him.

_"Lorelai--"_

_"Just get in." She walked into the steaming hot water, waiting for him to join her._

She could tell him but that would be selfish, wouldn't it?

He deserved _so_ much more than what she was giving him. But she was too stubborn to imagine him as somebody else's, doing the things they did, saying the things he said. She wouldn't be able to take it.

_"Remember, diner opens in twenty minutes."_

_"Shut up and hand me the shampoo, will you?"_

She wouldn't be able to take him being with somebody else and here she was, with somebody other than him. How could he take this much from her?

She grabbed the shampoo and washed her hair in a slow, careful matter.

_He squeezed shampoo into his hands and motioned for her to turn around. He rubbed it together in his hands and slowly tangled his hands in her wet tresses careful not to miss a piece of hair. A soft moan escaped her mouth, loving the way he was making her feel._

She massaged her scalp in slow motions, trying not to irritate it anymore than it already was. She probably shouldn't be in there too long if Luke wanted any warm water.

_He turned her around, her eyes tightly closed, and made her step back into the water casting through her hair, rinsing out the shampoo._

She'd figure something out. She'd have to. It would just take a little time, that's all.

_He applied soap on the sponge while she put conditioner in her hair, the specific kind she brought to his apartment because she knows he loves the smell of it. She opened her eyes, blushing slightly as he gazed at her. He stepped closer to her, rubbing the sponge along her back, her neck, turning her around and working his way from her stomach, to her chest, to her arms. Slowly working his way down her legs, in between her legs, her feet, and all the way back up to the hollow of her neck. _

She was lonely with Max. They weren't the married couple she figured them to be. That was probably her fault though. She didn't give him a chance. She quickly applied soap on a sponge, completing the process of her shower as she washed her body slowly.

_She opened her eyes and smiled with her eyes. She loved seeing him in this current estate. His long eyelashes blinking slowly, his wet hair covering his eyes partially, his smile that could make her melt. _

She turned the water off, reaching for a towel and stepping out into the foggy bathroom. She rubbed the fogged up mirror, through her hair in a loose ponytail and dried herself off. She tucked the towel around her and walked out of the bathroom.

He was sitting on the couch in the dark, waiting for her to get out of the bathroom.

She walked over to him as he got up and pointed to the bed. "I left you some clothes on the bed."

"Thanks." She said quietly, walking towards the bed.

"Do you want to change in the bathroom?"

"No it's okay, go ahead. I'll just change out here."

"Okay, I'll just be a few minutes."

He walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him and leaning against the wall. He screwed up, didn't he? He took off his clothes in one sweep and got into the water she left running for him. She always did that when they didn't shower together. He liked it though.

He reached over for the shampoo and squeezed a little out.

_"I don't need as much as you, you know."_ _He told her when she grabbed the bottle of shampoo and squeezed a handful out._

_"Sure ya do. Now turn around."_

He tilted his hair back, getting it wet a bit before rubbing the shampoo in.

_She washed his hair, running her fingers through his hair slowly, enjoying every second of it. Luke's body relaxed as he enjoyed the feeling even more so. She titled his head back into the water, running her hand through his hair so she could get all the shampoo out. He helped her out with this part as she squeezed the conditioner into her hands, soon repeating the same process._

He rinsed his hair, rubbing his eyes from the shampoo now stinging his eyes slightly. He did the same process with the conditioner, slowly and surely.

_She lathered up the sponge for him this time, slowly rubbing his arms in small circles, down to his hands, back up his arms to his neck and down his long torso. She continued between his legs, down his legs and feet. A strangled moan escaped his mouth as she worked her way back up to his face, kissing his lips softly._

He finished up in the shower, getting out and yanking the towel hanging from the door. He dried himself off and put on his shorts and tee-shirt, hanging up the towel before he left the bathroom.

He walked out and saw her sitting on the edge of his bed, smiling softly at him. He walked over to bed, not even wanting to arrange separate sleeping arrangements. They could sleep in the same bed without anything happening. It wasn't _that_ tough. He climbed into the beds and motioned for her to get underneath as well. She arranged herself neatly under the covers, closing her eyes and breathing out loudly.

She almost forgot to breathe when he tapped the spot next to her.

She was being silly and she knew it. But she couldn't control it.

_She pulled herself away from him but it only took a quick look in his eyes before her lips crashed down onto his. She moaned into his mouth at the feeling of his tongue running across her bottom lip. She shivered against the water and pushed him towards the back of the shower._

_Her hands started roaming, through his hair, down around his neck, to his arms, his sides. He gripped her waist, pushing her body tightly against his, causing her to feel his body hard against hers._

_She moved away from him, long enough for him to enter her in one quick stroke. A muffled moan escaped her lips as they stood there adjusting to the feeling of him inside of her._

_Slowly thrusting into her, she lifted a leg and wrapped it around his waist in attempt to make things easier. She leaned her head into his neck, nibbling softly trying to withhold her screams. _

_He placed a hand on her neck and brought her lips to his, kissing her passionately as he supported his other hand on the back of the thigh which was still around his waist._

_She tore her lips away from his, tossing her head back into the water now falling on her face. She mumbled his name, voice becoming horse as she neared her climax. He knew she was close to being pushed over the edge so did what it took to make her reach the point of no return._

_A hushed gasp exited her lips as she pushed him against the back of the shower, leaning her body into his, both of them breathing quickly. She kissed the top of his chest, working her way up to his neck, and finally to his mouth all while there bodies were still connected._

_She looked up, enjoying their last minutes together before she had to go. She smiled and wiped away the water dripping from his face. She kissed right below his eyes, keeping her lips pressed against his upper cheek as she tried catching her breath._

_He lifted his mouth and kissed the top of her head as she lowered her head down on his chest._

It was almost 4:30 when Lorelai woke up to the feeling of somebody on top of her. She opened her eyes and turned her head around, looking at Luke who wrapped his body around her.

One of his arms placed under the pillow, the other around her waist. She looked down and noticed his legs tangled within hers, soon noting his lips pressed against the back of her shoulder.

She sighed softly and closed her eyes, peacefully drifting off into sleep. "It's always been you." She mumbled before leaning back into his arms even more so.

xx

It was near seven when they woke up still tangled in each others arms. Luke was the first to notice the position but quickly pulled himself away from her. She turned around to see if he was awake and sure enough, he was.

"Morning." She said smiling shyly.

"Good morning."

"Sleep well?" She asked.

"Yeah, did you?"

"Mmm hmm." She nodded her head before sitting up in bed, glancing at the clock. "You've got to open soon."

"Yeah, in about thirty minutes."

She got up and looked around for her clothes, hoping they'd be dry. She didn't have to worry about Max seeing her because she didn't wear these clothes two nights ago when she left.

"I should get going."

"Yeah, uh, listen Lorelai," he ran his hands through his hair, contemplating what to say next, "can you sit down for a second?"

She walked over to the edge of the bed and sat beside him.

"About last night, I didn't, uh, I didn't mean what I said. About…ending things." He said slowly.

Lorelai's eyes widened, suddenly looking confused. "You didn't?"

"Lorelai, I just don't know _what_ you want."

"I want _you_." She confessed quietly.

"You do?" He questioned.

"Of course I do, Luke. Why else do you think I'm here? Why else do you think I've been with _you_ ever since the first time we made love before my wedding?"

"I don't know." He admitted.

Cause after all, he really didn't.

"If that's the case though…why are…" He started, not wanting to finish the sentence.

"I'm going to tell Max. And soon. I want to Luke. I really do."

He breathed in deeply. "Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Ok then."

"I mean, that is if you want me still." Lorelai said quickly. "If you want to be with me, I mean."

He looked up at her and smiled. "Of course I do, Lorelai."

"Okay, good." She glanced at the clock. "I should get going."

"Alright, well…"

"I'll talk to you soon."

She got up from the bed and walked into the bathroom to change into her clothes from the previous night.

xx

"I can't believe your mom is making us take every single thing made out of wood out the house." Rory complained while pulling a chair out of the antique store.

"You can't? I can. This is my mom we're talking about here, Rory."

Rory looked up from her chair and nodded. "Good point."

They finished taking everything out to the sidewalk and sat down on two chairs in the front.

"I'm so tired and look--it's only 7:30."

"I know it's going to be a _long_ day."

"That's for sure."

Just then, a familiar jeep drove by and both Rory and Lane's heads shot up.

"Was that my--" Rory started.

"Your mom?" Lane finished.

"What is she doing in Stars Hollow at 7:30? She's supposed to be at some business class seminar in Litchfield.

"Maybe she's passing through on her way back?"

"Litchfield is on the whole other side of Hartford."

"Maybe she was just checking up on the Inn."

Rory arched an eyebrow and nodded her head. "Yeah, maybe." She said unconvinced.

xx

"Is anyone home?" Lorelai called when she walked into the house with her small overnight bag.

Max walked into the front hall, greeting her with a huge smile as he walked in the hall to meet her.

"Hey, you're home!" He said rushing up to her and giving her a kiss.

"Yeah, got out early this morning." She said, trying to hide her nerves.

"Did you have a good time?" He asked, truly interested. "Here, let me grab your bag."

He took her bag and led her up the stairs to their room.

"Yeah, it was a lot of fun. I learned a lot of new stuff that might help in the future. You know, once I figure out what's going to happen with the Inn and everything." She lied.

He smiled and sat on the bed next to her. "I'm glad you had fun." He leaned over and gave her a soft kiss. "I missed you while you were gone."

She blushed and looked down, playing with her fingers. "I missed you too."

She looked up and studied his happy face.

"Max," she said quietly, "can I…talk to you?"

"Of course."

Only half a second later he was up from the bed and headed towards the closet.

"Wait before you tell me, I want to show you something."

He opened the closet and showed her the new shelves he built for her, hanging up on the wall. She had been complaining about wanting them ever since they moved in.

"I had some extra time on my hands this weekend and figured it would be nice to set up the shelves."

"Aw Max!" She got up from the bed and walked over to observe her very own new shelves. "Thanks!" She said before hugging him tightly.

"It was the least I could do. You've only been asking for them since we moved in here." He said laughing.

"Took ya long enough." She said sarcastically.

"Yeah, so anyways what did you have to talk to me about?"

She bit her lip and swung her head back up to him. "You know what? Never mind, it was nothing."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, positive."

xx

Later that night, they were till Rory-less. She had been at Lane's all day helping move out all the furniture from the Kim's house for the remodeling. They expected her to be back later tonight so after dinner, Max and Lorelai were curled up on the couch watching a movie.

They were both lying down on the couch, Max keeping Lorelai from falling off. He held on around her waist while watching the movie, kissing the top of her head at one point.

"I really missed you while you were gone."

Lorelai closed her eyes and sighed quietly. "I know I missed you too."

"It's nice to have you around. I was starting to get the feeling Rory was getting sick of me."

Something in his voice made Lorelai's heart ache for him. She turned around to face him and kissed him quickly on the lips.

"I don't think she's getting sick of you."

"You don't?"

"No I don't."

She stared into his eyes, hoping to find an answer to all her problems.

She wanted to tell Max, she really did. She _knew_ in her heart, she wanted to be with Luke. As much as she cared for Max, it really wasn't _there_ and she knew with Luke, everything was there.

But there was an easy way out of this. There just wasn't a way to make everybody happy. She closed her eyes and turned around in his arms as she slowly drifted off into her own world. It was too hard to break things off with Max. It was too hard and she didn't know how to do it.

She was going to have to tell Luke that, but she didn't know how to do that either.

xx

Early the next morning with both Max and Rory at school, Lorelai got up and got dressed to go to the diner. She was going to tell Luke things had to end between them.

Officially end.

It was the easy way out and she was in too deep to think of another solution.

She got in her car and headed over to the diner. The whole drive there, she tried not to think about what she was going to say. She didn't want something planned, just something that would work.

She decided to park in front of her old house. She didn't want things to look to obvious so she figured it would be okay to park there, except for the chance that Babette or Morey might spot her car. She walked down the street, the most secretive path hoping she wouldn't see anyone she knew. She got to the diner a few minutes later but there were only a handful of people scattered around the place. She walked in and sat down at the counter, waiting for Luke to come out.

After a few minutes of waiting, Lorelai walked towards the back and saw only Caesar in the kitchen.

She poked her head through the door. "Hey Caesar, do you know where Luke is?"

"He's upstairs still."

"Thanks."

She avoided seeing anybody she knew and ran up the stairs to his apartment, knocking on the door when she reached it.

"Luke?" She called out.

"Hey, it's open."

She walked in to see Luke buttoning the jeans of his pants, not yet wearing a shirt. He must have not been down to the diner yet, she realized.

"Hi." She said suddenly becoming shy.

He smiled and walked over towards her.

"Hi."

"I'm not interrupting anything am I?" She said motioning to his half naked estate.

"No, just getting ready to go downstairs, that's all."

"Oh okay, well you think I could steal you away from it for a minute? I want to talk to you about something."

"Yeah no problem. You want something to drink?" He said walking to the fridge and pulling out a water bottle for himself.

"No, I'm fine, thanks."

He sat down on the couch beside her and looked at her curiously.

"What's up?" He asked.

She looked up at him and watched him take a sip of water, licking his lips before putting the cap back on.

She stared at his lips, down to his bare stomach and long hands gripping his water bottle. He leaned against the back of the couch and continued staring at her.

"Luke I…" she started nervously.

"Yeah?"

"I…"

It only took a second before her lips crashed down onto his. She quickly moved her body so she was straddling his lap, wasting absolutely no time.

He pulled away a second later and looked her in the eyes.

"Lorelai you had something to say."

"I told Max." She said.

"You did? Already?"

She swallowed guiltily, needing to be with him so much at the moment that she couldn't help but lie. "Yeah, and we still have to talk about a few things but he knows."

"He knows." Luke said quietly.

"Right."

She leaned down and kissed him slowly before he could get another word out. She couldn't believe she just lied about _that._ She felt so guilty kissing him but purely couldn't get enough.

It took him a minute before he relaxed into the process and wrapped his hands around her waist, moving her with him as he lied on the couch, lowering her on top of him.

He tangled his hand in her hair, moving his other hand slowly underneath her shirt, sweeping it over her head in one quick motion.

xx

"I wonder where your mom is." Max said pulling in to the driveway, not spotting Lorelai's jeep. He glanced at the clock, it was 2:30.

"You know, funniest thing. The other day, I saw her in Stars Hollow. Before she came back from her seminar meeting."

"Why was she in Stars Hollow? Her meeting was in Litchfield."

"I know. I forgot to ask her when I saw her. Kind of weird though, don't you think?"

"Yeah that is a little weird." He said skeptically. "Hey why don't you go inside, I think I'm going to go take a drive, I got an errand to run." He said suspiciously.

"Sure no problem. You'll be home soon?" She asked.

"Yeah about an hour or so."

"Alright, I'll tell mom to call you if she comes home."

"Yes, please do."

"Alright, see ya." She said closing the door.

xx

It was almost 3 when she woke up. They had made love two times before he left her asleep to go down to the diner. She had been sleeping for a few hours now and totally lost track of time.

She shot up in his bed, noticing right away that she was alone.

She needed to get him up there somehow but couldn't risk seeing somebody. She walked over to her purse, grabbed her cell and dialed the number to the diner.

"Luke's." He answered.

"Luke it's me, I need you to come upstairs."

"Who is this?"

"Lorelai, who else?"

"Oh I'll be up in a second." He said before hanging up the phone and walking up the stairs.

She tossed her clothes on while he walked up to the apartment. He opened the door just as she put her shirt on.

"I've got go. I need to be home when Max and Rory get home, which evidentially, is too late." She said.

"Oh so…you're leaving?"

"Yeah but I'll call you when I know what's going on."

He frowned to himself, wishing she didn't have to leave. He knew they still had to talk about things though, her and Max, and he accepted that.

"Alright, come here." He motioned.

She walked up to him and kissed him softly on the lips.

"Wait is the diner busy? Should I sneak out the back?"

Luke thought for a moment before asking her, "where did you park?"

"In front of my old house."

"Well yeah, I'd say sneak through the back."

With one final kiss, she was out the door.

xx.

It was about to be three when Max pulled onto the exit ramp for Stars Hollow. He glanced both ways before getting off the highway and heading down the street.

* * *

crosses fingers I swear it won't take another month for the next chapter! I think there's only one or two chapters left, yeah? 

Leave a review:)


	6. Crashing

**Who Lies Beneath**

**Disclaimer:** I own nada.

**Summary: **LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistakes before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

**Authors Note:** I really do apologize that it takes me a month to update. I seriously had no idea that much time passed until Annick mentioned it. So, sorry for being a compulsive liar and saying it wouldn't take me another month even though it very well did. ;)

You guys have **blown** us away with the reviews yet again. Thank you so much for all your sweetness, you guys are seriously the best. Big thanks to everyone on FF as well, you know who you are. Keep up the great reviews, please!

Special thanks to **Lor** for making the WLB music video a while back. I used the song for part of something in this chapter. The lyrics to the italicized sentences are to the song 'The Weakness in Me.'

**Annick,** thanks for your support all the way through so far. This chapter is for you despite how much I didn't want to write it :P (PS, see you in 17 days. Are you nervous? Heh, I am…xx.)

Anyways, I'll shut up now. Enjoy the chapter and please leave a review! We love to know what you think.

* * *

As Max pulled off the highway at the exit labeled Stars Hollow, he gazed at the oncoming traffic he had to suffer to get through once he got off the ramp.

But wait, there was absolutely none.

He almost forgot how small Stars Hollow is. Sure the highway exit was all the way at the other side of the town but it wouldn't take him more than five minutes to get to where he needed to be; the center of the town.

Maybe that's why he didn't like Stars Hollow _that_ much. It's not that he didn't admire the small town charm; it's that he'd rather be somewhere a little more upbeat and well, a little bit larger. He was a Hartford kind of guy, plain and simple. Lorelai on the other hand, total opposite. She loved Stars Hollow. No matter where she lived, Stars Hollow would always be her _home._

For the moment, her Hartford estate was nothing but a house. A convenient blurb in town they settled in. And yes, settling is exactly what they did.

Sure, it was convenient though. If Lorelai was working, it would be a different story. She would be again soon but for the mean time she needed to take some time off and settle. It was an agreement she made with herself despite how much she would rather be at the Inn than at home all the time. How much settling did she need?

Max drove the streets toward the center of town. He wasn't sure where he was planning on going but he figured she'd be around here somewhere. Deciding to take a detour to get to town, he turned down Lorelai's old street. It wasn't until he reached the end of the block that he noticed her familiar jeep parked in front of the abandoned house. He arched an eyebrow, hesitating to get out but decided to keep driving.

'She's definitely around here somewhere.' He thought to himself as he drove to the square.

This could be considered weird if asked by some. Here he was, roaming around the once familiar streets of a town his wife used to live in. He didn't necessarily have a purpose to being there though, curiosity struck him spontaneously.

So what if he did see her? It's not like she's a committing a crime or anything.

xx

"I've got to go. I need to be home when Max and Rory get home, which evidentially, is too late." She said.

"Oh so…you're leaving?"

"Yeah but I'll call you when I know what's going on."

He frowned to himself, wishing she didn't have to leave. He knew they still had to talk about things through, her and Max, and he accepted that.

"Alright, come here." He motioned.

She walked up to him and kissed him softly on the lips.

"Wait is the diner busy? Should I sneak out the back?"

Luke thought for a moment before asking her, "where did you park?"

"In front of my old house."

"Well yeah, I'd say sneak through the back."

"With one final kiss, she was out the door.

xx

He circled the town's center one last time before giving up. He figured if some random onlooker saw him going 'round and 'round in circles around the town that they would think he lost his mind.

He wasn't going to find her; it was plain and simple, despite how tiny the town was.

He took a left at the light and was on his way again. On his way back home.

xx

Lorelai closed the apartment door, leaning against the wall in the hall and sighing loudly before walking down the stairs.

Everything had gotten so messed up. Absolutely _none_ of this was supposed to happen. It was so unlike her to be lying, not only to her husband, but to the only strand of her true happiness she had left.

And it wasn't like she was lying about something simple. She wasn't lying about eating her vegetables when secretly she spit them in her napkin and threw it in the garbage. She wasn't lying that the oven burners were hot devils to keep Rory from going anywhere near them. She was lying to her husband and her best friend who had grown to be so much more about something life changing.

And she didn't know how to resolve it.

She exited through the back door and took a short cut her and Rory once found to get back home. She walked the streets back to her old house, hoping she wouldn't see Babette or Maury suddenly arriving home because she knew they weren't there when she first got there.

Luckily, she didn't see their car in the driveway but she quickly got into the car anyways, turning on the engine and leaving the town as quick as possible.

She fumbled with the radio and after a failed attempt to find something good, she settled on a song she had never heard before. She wasn't really paying attention anyways, but something about the tune caught her attention.

_Feeling guilty, worried, waking from tormented sleep, this old love has me bound, but the new love comes deep._

Lorelai's eyes widened as she listened intently to the words.

_If I choose now, I'll loose out, one of you has to fall._

She almost stopped the car, scared to be listening to how similar these words sounded to her very own problem.

_I need you, and you._

She sighed heavily, leaning her head back as she sat at the red light.

She would have turned it off but it was like her fingers wouldn't touch the radio. She felt maybe, if this person who had only sung three lines from the middle of one of the songs they wrote shared the same…condition, as she did, that maybe she'd sing, and there would be an answer, that there would be some sort of mutual agreement within the lyrics that maybe, one day, someday, everything would be okay.

_Why do you come here when you know I've got troubles enough? Why do you call me when you know I can't answer the phone? Make me lie when I don't want to, and make someone else some kind of unknowing fool. _

'Way to go, Lorelai,' she though to herself.

_You make me stay, when I should not, are you so strong or is all the weakness in me?_

She hit the 'off' button and drove the rest of the ride home lost in thought, something that could easily be considered a new hobby of hers, one that she didn't enjoy.

She pulled into the driveway, nodding when she saw Max's car already in front of hers. She gathered her purse from the passenger seat and retreated outside of the car and into the house.

"Anyone home?" She asked, dropping her keys on the table in the front hall. She looked in the mirror and rolled her eyes at her image, suddenly feeling very ashamed or herself.

"In here." Rory said from the living room couch.

"Hey kid." Lorelai said walking in, dropping a kiss on Rory's head. "How was school?"

Lorelai plopped down on the couch next to her, retreating to hear about her day.

"It was fine. Paris was annoying me with stuff for the Franklin. She doesn't think we're going to be ready by next Monday to get the issue out."

"Do you think you guys can?"

"Of course. Paris is just really, what's the word, anal about certain things. She doesn't think that the front page is going to 'catch the reader's eye.'"

"I'll give her something that'll catch her eye if you know what I mean." Lorelai said, leaning against the back of the couch, closing her eyes for a moment.

"Long day?" Rory asked, noticing her mother's current position.

"I was just about to ask the same thing." Max said, walking into the living room. He placed his hands on her shoulders and leaned down to give her a kiss on the cheek, practically forcing herself to open her eyes.

She smiled softly at him. "Hi."

"How was your day?"

"Fine, I'm just a little tired."

"Oh yeah? Where were you?"

Lorelai closed her eyes as casually as possibly, trying to think as quick as possible of an excuse. This arrangement was starting to get tiring, she thought.

"My parent's house."

"In Hartford." Max said suspiciously.

"Unless there's suddenly another couple of head-ache giving people who gladly admit to me being their daughter, Hartford is the place."

"What were you doing there?" Max asked casually.

"Yeah what inspired you to go there?" Rory chipped in.

"You know, I was just helping my mom plan her DAR meeting at the Inn. I told her I'd help her with you know, passing the information and all over there that it is _the_ Emily Gilmore and to be prepared."

"Oh well that was nice of you." Max said, not completely satisfied with her answer.

'Maybe she went to the Inn to literally inform them,' he thought to himself.

"Yeah it was fine." She said, nodding her head.

"So I was thinking," Max began, "we haven't been out to dinner in a while. What do you guys think of going out tonight?"

"I actually was going to go visit Lane and Dean tonight…" Rory stated skeptically.

Max's eyes averted over to Lorelai. "You don't have to go visit anyone tonight, do you?" He said with no actual meaning behind his statement.

Lorelai gave him a confused look, trying to play as calm as possible. "Dinner sounds great."

"So is it okay if I take your car, mom?"

"That's fine babe, don't stay out too late. You've got school tomorrow."

"Thank you for reminding me."

Rory got up from the couch and walked into her room so she could get ready to go out. After all, the more time the better.

"So did you do anything else today?" Max asked, walking around to sit where Rory previously was planted.

"Mmm," she pretended to ponder the idea, "not really. I just went to my parents and walked around the shops downtown a bit. I need a new pair of shoes."

"You don't have enough?" He asked laughing.

"What kind of question is that?" She acted hurt. "A girl could never have enough shoes, Max."

"Well thank you, for informing me." He leaned over and gave her a small kiss on her lips. She pulled away but he left his forehead pressed against hers.

"Open your eyes." He said softly.

She slowly opened her eyes, suddenly staring into Max's eyes. He smiled and grazed the side of her cheek with his hand. She bit her lip and suspended her smile.

"Everything okay?"

"Of course."

"Just checking. If you want you can go lay down before we leave. Your mom must have worn you out."

"One of her many powers."

"So I'm told." He said laughing a little. "I've got a pile of papers to grade so I'm going to work on those for a little while."

Max got up from the couch, leaving Lorelai alone to think…again. Something she could hardly register to do anymore.

She sat on the couch only for a few minutes before getting up to see what Rory was up to.

"Hey." She said, lying down on Rory's bed.

"Blue or black?" Rory asked, holding up two sweaters.

"Black."

"I knew you'd say that."

"You know me too well, kid. What can I say?"

Rory laughed, tossing on the sweater over her head.

"So you're going to see Dean and Lane, huh?"

"Yeah, we might catch a movie at BWR if Mrs. Kim lets Lane out of the house."

"Ah yes, going out on a school night _does_ go against rule #44 in the Mrs. Kim handbook."

"It does."

Rory sat down on the bed next to her mom, both of them staying quiet. After a few minutes of absolutely no noise, Lorelai began to speak.

"That was weird."

"What?"

"That little awkward silence we just had right there."

"You can never handle silence can you?"

"Oh blasphemy."

"So I think I'm going to get going." Rory said, getting up from the bed.

Lorelai grabbed her arm and pulled her back down onto the bed. "Hey, wait."

"What?"

"Stay here, talk to me."

"But I told them I'd be there--"

"I feel like we haven't talked in a while." Lorelai commented, poking Rory on the side of her stomach.

"Well, that school sure is taking up plenty of my time."

"What do you say you skip tomorrow?" Lorelai said, giggling evilly.

"I can't." Rory said pointedly.

Lorelai pouted drastically. "Why?"

"I only drive with my teacher every single day. What would he think of that?" She said, referring to Max.

"Rory my dear, where have I failed you? Don't you understand the concept of having a teacher as a step-dad? You use him, tell him you're not going to school, tell him to find out what you missed that day and then you'll be all caught up!"

"Step-dad and teacher are two totally different things."

"I guess. But you can fool either one of them, right?"

"I've got to go." Rory said, getting up from her moms grasp.

"Fine. But tonight at dinner, I'm telling Max you're not going to school tomorrow." She said sighing heavily.

"Goodbye crazy lady."

"Have fun."

Lorelai lied back on Rory's bed, resting her eyes for a few minutes.

"_I told Max."_

"_You did? Already?"_

"_Yeah, and we still have to talk about a few things but he knows."_

"_He knows."_

"_Right."_

Wrong.

"_I had some extra time on my hands this weekend and figured it would be nice to set up the shelves."_

"_Aw Max! Thanks!"_

"_It was the least I could do. You've only been asking for them since we moved in here."_

"_Took ya long enough."_

"_Yeah, so anyways what did you have to talk to me about?"_

"_You know what? Never mind, it was nothing."_

"_You sure?"_

"_Yeah, positive."_

Fact of the matter was, she wasn't so positive to begin with. She wasn't positive the first time she kissed Luke, she wasn't positive the first time she told Max she loved him, she wasn't positive the first time she told Luke she wanted to be with him and she wasn't positive when she decided, tonight, that she was going to tell Max.

No, she certainly wasn't positive about anything.

Maybe figuring out exactly—_exactly,_ what she wanted would help.

But the only way to do that seemed too weak.

Pro and con lists were for children.

xx

"You're not eating your food." Max commented, looking over at Lorelai's practically full plate.

She poked at a piece of her chicken, quickly shoving it in her mouth. "Sure I am."

"You've hardly touched your plate since you got it."

"I'm just…not very hungry."

"That's a first." Max said laughing, Lorelai not remarking at all.

She put down her fork and rested her hands on the table, gazing down at her plate. Max observed her from his seat before placing his hands over hers, squeezing them gently.

"We'll leave soon."

xx

She successfully managed to eat half of her food and even drank a cup of coffee while picking at her coffee cake after dinner. They made subtle conversation on what's been going on with her while he's at school and how his students have been treating him thus far.

There had been something he wanted to talk to her about but waited specifically. He couldn't get the image of her car in front of her old house out of his head. But he didn't know exactly how to bring that up.

As they got into the car, Max put the keys in the ignition but hesitated before shifting into drive.

"What are you doing?" She asked after a few moments of realizing he wasn't driving.

"Looking at you."

Lorelai turned her head and met his eyes slowly.

"What?" She asked, slightly annoyed. She knew she shouldn't be getting testy with him because then he'd definitely be on to something.

"Am I fun to look at?" She joked sarcastically.

"Are you okay?" He asked quickly.

"What?"

"Is something bothering you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You don't?" He asked, surprised.

"No, I don't."

"You've just seemed really out of it lately. We haven't talked nearly as much recently as before, we hardly ever go out…I mean, correct me if I'm wrong but I didn't think this was how the beginning of a marriage was supposed to be."

"Oh Max." She said quietly, looking down, hiding the embarrassment from her face.

It hit her hard, him realizing that something was wrong. She didn't want to continuously lie to him, hurting him even more in the long run but she couldn't figure out how to go upon doing this.

"I'm sorry, it's my fault."

"It's nobody's fault, it's just--"

"No. It is my fault. I've just…Max, I've just had a lot on my mind lately. I guess I'm just a little nuts staying home all the time, not working. I thought it would be nice to take a break from work for a while, but it's making me crazy. I need my Inn. I need my life back."

"Your life," he stated, "before we were married?"

She arched an eyebrow, confused. "What are you saying?" She asked.

"I should ask the same thing."

"I just meant I miss things from my life…before Hartford. I miss my house, my town, my job," she reasoned, "my friends." The word friends lingered on her tongue longer than planned.

She glanced over at Max who had an unreadable expression on his face.

"I'm sorry." She said, biting her lip. "I love…being here too. It's just I miss things sometimes, you know? But hey, I'm being silly. There's nothing I can do about it. So I'm just going to have to suck it up."

"I understand though."

"You do?"

"I do. I get it, you miss your stuff. I just wanted to make sure that was all it was that was bothering you because you've just been acting a little distant lately. I wanted to make sure everything was okay…with us."

Lorelai smiled, looking down to study her hands which were holding each other tightly. She looked up at Max and leaned in to kiss him slowly.

"I'm sorry." She mumbled against his lips. "I'm so sorry."

She knew she wasn't apologizing for missing her stuff. She was apologizing for everything else under the sun. He just had no idea.

"Don't be sorry." He said, pulling back.

She laughed pathetically; 100 completely ashamed of herself.

"Let's go home." She said quietly.

The drive home was quiet with stolen glances in Max's direction. She continued looking at him, no matter how much she wanted her eyes to stay in one civil direction where she didn't have to look at a man, the man, who trusted her to be true to her words. She couldn't bare knowing she was breaking her husbands heart all of this time and he had absolutely no clue.

xx

"Are you ready for your history test?"

Rory fumbled through her backpack looking for a set of her notes to look over last minute while her and Max were headed to school.

"I think so. I've been studying day in and day out with the exception of last night."

"I didn't see you come in last night, I must have fallen asleep before you got home. How are Dean and Lane?"

"They're good. We saw a movie at BWR and ate dinner and Jo's."

"That's good. I'm glad you got to see them."

"It was nice," she agreed, "how was dinner?"

Max smiled, refraining from getting into anything detailed with Rory in fear of upsetting her, knowing how down her mother is.

"It was good. I actually had a small conversation with your mom."

"Okay…"

"And…I don't know, I've just noticed something a little different about her lately. She hasn't been herself lately."

"I know. When we watched Sixteen Candles the other day she hardly recited any lines."

"And she hardly ate last night. She didn't even make one subtly rude remark on our waiter either. So I asked her if everything was okay."

Rory turned to Max, suddenly concerned. "Everything is okay, right?"

"Yes, it is. She just mentioned how she misses your old house, and working…you know general things like that. Things she had prior to moving here."

"Yeah, sometimes I do too."

"It was an admirable town." Max noted.

"Hey you know what?" Rory asked excitedly.

"What?"

"Tomorrow is the firelight festival. Have you ever been to one with us?"

"I can't say I have. I know I've heard your mom talk about them though."

"Yeah well I forgot to tell my mom, but when I was back there yesterday I saw them getting the bonfire ready. And I passed Miss Patty on her way to Doose's. She was getting supplies for her famous founders day punch."

"Her supplies?"

"One packet of fruit punch, multiple bottles of vodka, and ice."

"Got it." Max laughed.

"Anyways, mom always loves going. We should go."

"That sounds like a good idea to me. I'm sure that would boost her spirits up a bit."

"A lot if you ask me."

They drove the rest of the way, both happy the found something that could potentially cheer Lorelai up. Neither loved her being down. Sure she could be annoying with her particular quirks but those quirks are what Max fell in love with and he never liked seeing anyone he cared about being down.

"Oh," Max gasped, "I forgot I have a meeting tomorrow night. But you girls can still go."

"What time is it at? Maybe we can wait for you?"

"It starts at 7…I'm sure I won't even get out until 9 or after, if I'm that lucky. It'd be a lost cause. But you girls can go, have fun without me."

"If you say so."

"I do."

xx

It was around 1 when Lorelai got back from running her errands. She had to drop something off at her parents, return a pair of shoes that unfortunately did not fit as well as she thought, and thought she'd be spontaneous and go grocery shopping.

She hadn't talked to Luke since she left his apartment yesterday. Luke figured she needed time to adjust to the telling of Max. He kept busy with the diner but wouldn't lie, thought about her just about every free (or non-free) second he had.

She knew she had to call him. The last thing she could do was begin to ignore him—not like she wanted to. Even if she wanted to though, he'd have no reason to accept her ignoring him if she ever wanted him to believe she actually told Max the truth.

As she settled in, she grabbed the phone and sprawled across the couch, punching the familiar number.

"Luke's."

She smiled through the phone, admiring hearing his voice. "Hey stranger."

"Who's this?" He asked, obviously in a rush.

She could hear the crowd in the back round, assuming very well that it was busy.

"Comforting."

"What?" He grabbed a plate from the back and slid it down to a man at the counter. "Hello?"

"It's Lorelai!" She practically screamed.

"Oh," his voice softened, "sorry, it's busy. I can hardly hear you."

"Go into the back." She suggested.

"Give me a second."

She waited on the line, hearing a loud crash followed by words of profanity escaping from Luke's mouth. After a few moments, she heard a door close, closing off the noise from pouring into the phone.

"Sorry. Lunch rush." He supplied.

"I figured. You drop somethin'?"

"Just a plate." He said simply.

She giggled. "Cause that's safe."

He smiled through the phone, glad to hear her voice again.

"I haven't talked to you for a while."

She loved that to him a day equaled a while. She agreed though, and that's what made her happy. That she wasn't the only fool who couldn't resist hearing or seeing him for more than a day.

"Hence my calling."

"How are you?"

"I'm fine. I was reading an article today on coffee and thought of you."

"I wonder why." He said, laughing.

She absolutely loved hearing the sound of his laugh. Every time they were together, she'd be sure to do something that would make him laugh, never getting sick of the not so familiar sound she had missed out on over the years.

"Cause you're my supplier, that's why."

"And what did the article say?"

"That drinking coffee is really bad for you. Way to ever inform me, bucko. I'm glad you want me dying when I reach the big 4-0."

"You have got to be kidding me." He said flatly.

"Not kidding at all." She said seriously, holding in her laughter.

"For the past _years_, I have told you how bad coffee is. Every single time you ask for coffee, I give you yet another reason why coffee is bad for you. Whether it's because it's horrible for your immune system, makes your teeth yellow, keeps you bouncing off the walls until 4 am, name the reason, I am _sure_ that I have told you, and you never listen, you insist on cup after cup after cup and what do I tell you every single time? I tell you that you need to stop drinking…especially if you ever want to live past 40."

Finally, taking a breath, all Luke could hear was Lorelai laughing hysterically.

"What?" He barked.

She continued laughing through his question, causing him to roll his eyes even more so than he started with.

"I _love_ ranting Luke." Lorelai's eyes widened after she said that, afraid it came out the wrong (or perhaps the right…) way.

"You, uh," he began.

She started speaking quickly. "I can just imagine you, gesturing wildly with your hands, yelling at me, especially about coffee. Did you actually believe for a second I haven't heard your excuses, cup after cup after cup?" She exaggerated, slightly.

"So that was all a joke?"

"That was _all_ a joke. Except for the part about reading the article."

"Well then that was one waste of a speech."

"I guess. It's not like it means anything to me."

"I know it doesn't."

There was an awkward silence before Lorelai spoke again.

"So…"

"So," he lowered his voice, "how are things?"

Lorelai took a deep breath, uncomfortable with the question.

"Things are…things."

"They're…things? Okay, well…"

"I just need a little more time, to figure everything out."

"I understand."

"But, things are going to change…and, soon." She said unconfidently.

He almost remarked at the tone of her voice but held back. "When will I see you again?"

"Soon. Probably sooner than we both think."

"Good."

"Good?" She asked, partially joking.

"Yeah, good. Cause, you know, I…"

She smiled. "Me too."

"Well, at least were on the same page here."

"Yeah, we are."

"Anyways, I better get back to the diner."

"Yeah, you should. So, I'll call you soon, okay?"

"Alright."

"Bye Luke."

"Bye Lorelai."

She hung up the phone and smiled to herself, thinking about Luke and _being_ with Luke. She wanted him, she knew that, she wanted every part of him and she wanted to be _his._ There was just no simple way to grant that wish though and that was the hard part.

She didn't _want_ to be lying to him. She hadn't given it too much thought, the reaction Luke will have when she says she was lying. Maybe she wouldn't have to tell him the truth, she thought, but that was no way to start a relationship.

'It was no way to start, how we started.' She thought to herself.

xx

At dinner that night, Rory remembered to mention the Firelight Festival to her mom.

"I forgot to tell you mom, guess what's going on in Stars Hollow tomorrow."

Lorelai remembered seeing people getting signs and what not together for some event when she was there last. She hadn't remembered what they were doing, probably because she didn't know in the first place.

"What?" She asked, swallowing a bite of food.

"The Firelight Festival."

Lorelai's eyes widened, a smile spreading far across her face. "Really?"

Max looked up from his plate, admiring Lorelai's reaction. "That's what Rory told me earlier." He commented.

"We've got to go!" Lorelai said excitedly.

"I've got a meeting tomorrow night but you girls should definitely go."

"I'm there!"

"I'm right there with you." Rory said.

"Perfect. What time do you think it starts?"

"I'm sure people will be around town all day. But I don't think they light the fire until 8."

"So, we've gotta be there before 10 if we want to catch the lighting, huh?" Lorelai said, somewhat sarcastically though it was probably true.

"Maybe we should bring matches. Just in case, I mean."

"Ah, but then where's the fun in that?"

"You're right. Never mind." Rory said, smiling.

xx

It was around 6:00 the next night when Rory and Lorelai were lounging on the couch. They were getting ready to go to Stars Hollow pretty soon. Rory mentioned how she hadn't had a burger from Luke's in a long time and suggested going there. Of course the idea gave Lorelai butterflies in her stomach. She wasn't sure how well that would go down. She remembered she'd have to get Luke in private, to tell him that she never exactly did tell Rory yet.

Rory, she thought. What in the world would Rory think of all of this? She sure wouldn't be proud with her mom. 'She might disown me,' she thought, biting nervously on her lip. She hadn't given all the surrounding effects of this thing with Luke thought. She hadn't planned on thinking about those things until she got the initial problem figured out, how to tell both Max and Luke the truth.

"Mom, are you paying attention?" Rory asked.

Lorelai came back to life. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Do you want to leave soon? I'm getting hungry."

"Yeah, sure, let me just go change my shirt real quick."

Fifteen minutes later, Lorelai came hopping down the stairs, clad in a fresh new outfit, new hairstyle and fresh makeup over her face.

"I thought you said you were going to just change your shirt."

"Sorry." Lorelai said, blushing. "I didn't like how I looked."

Rory rolled her eyes, getting up off the couch and turning the TV off. "Ready?"

"Yep."

The drive to Stars Hollow was quicker than usual. It had been though for Lorelai lately. She had spent a lot of gas money and mileage going back and forth from Hartford to Stars Hollow and back. It wasn't easy, the sneaking around thing. That's for sure.

"I've missed Luke's!" Rory said, getting out of the car. "Heck, I've missed Luke even."

Lorelai linked her arm through Rory's, nodding her head. "Yeah I've missed Luke's too."

The girls walked into the semi-empty restaurant. Everyone had been getting ready for the festival which was starting in about an hour or so. There was nobody in specific either girls had wanted to see at the diner.

"Corner?" Rory asked.

"You read my mind exactly."

They sat down at a table in the corner where they had sat at often. Lorelai looked around anxiously for Luke who was no where to be found.

"I wonder where Luke is." Rory said.

"Yeah, me too."

"I almost feel like I should look at a menu," Rory commented, "I feel like I haven't been here in forever."

Lorelai smiled, looking up as Luke walked out of the storage room. They locked eyes, smiling at each other, before Rory looked up and noticed Luke.

"Hey Luke!"

Luke poured them two cups of coffee and walked over to there table.

"Hey, Rory, long time no see." He quickly averted his eyes to Lorelai. "You too."

"I know we're here for the festival!" Rory said.

"Couldn't pass it up, could we now?" Lorelai smiled, looking up at him.

"I guess not."

"You look pretty dead around here; you should close up and walk around with us." Rory offered happily.

Luke looked over at Lorelai confused. He wasn't sure if Rory had known everything that was going on. He didn't think she did because she seemed way too cheery to see him. A little part of him thought Rory saw what everyone else did, the chemistry between him and Lorelai. He knew that he loved Rory regardless how she felt about him, mad, sad, happy, angry, whatever it was. He felt like a father to her, more than her pathetic actual dad had ever been. He had watched her grow up over the years and watched her blossom into a wonderful person. He didn't want to hurt her, or cause any drama in her life. That was the last thing he _wanted _for Rory and Lorelai.

For now, he kept the thought that she didn't know anything stored away in his head.

"Yeah, you should." Lorelai agreed.

"Well, after you two…I guess I don't see any point in sticking around. At least during the festival."

"Wow, you're actually agreeing to come to the festival with us?" Lorelai asked surprised.

"Well, you offered…or, well Rory did so…"

"I'm not complaining." She smiled.

"So, do you guys know what you want?"

"They usual." They both said at the same time.

"Extra cheese?" He asked.

"Yep."

It only took a few minutes before the girls got there cheeseburgers, both with extra cheese, onions for Lorelai, none for Rory, both extra fries and a refill of coffee. The two of them together inhaled their food in a matter of minutes, leaving Luke speechless.

"Wow."

"What?" Lorelai looked up.

"I just brought you your food and now it's already gone."

"We missed your food!"

"Do they not feed you in Hartford?" He asked.

"Not the way you do." Lorelai said seductively, biting her tongue afterwards. She probably said that a little _too_ seductive but Rory didn't even notice as she gazed out the window.

"Lane's outside. I think. Is that Lane?" Rory asked, pointing to a person far from all of their views.

Luke and Lorelai both squinted their eyes, trying to make out who she was pointing at in the first place.

Lorelai looked up at Luke who was still fixed on the person outside the window. She looked back at Rory. "You know what, I think that is." She said confidently.

"I'll be right back then. I'm going to see if she can come to the square with us." She got up from her chair and walked out the door leaving Luke and Lorelai alone in the diner, the other man getting up to leave as well.

"Come again soon." Luke said to the man who nodded his head and left.

Lorelai looked up at Luke and smiled. "Hi."

He smiled back, looking towards the kitchen where Caesar was singing happily to himself.

"Caesar I'll be right back." He called into the kitchen.

"K, boss!"

"Hi." He said softly, looking out the window before grabbing Lorelai's hand and dragging her (willingly of course) into the storage room. He closed the door behind them.

"Hi again." She said, walking up to him and wrapping her arms around his waist, pulling him in for a kiss.

"I think we've said hi enough." He said pulling away.

She smiled, keeping him close to her. "I'm glad to see you."

"You too."

"You're really going to come to the festival with us?"

"If you want me to."

She kissed him again, resting one hand on the waist band of his jeans, the other on the back of his neck.

"Of course I do." She mumbled in between kisses.

"Well then I'm there."

"Oh," she said softly, pulling away from Luke slightly, "uhm, I haven't you know, told Rory yet. So we can't be…well, like this." She said pointing at the two of them.

"I didn't think you did. You've only told Max?"

Lorelai swallowed guiltily. "Uhm, yeah."

"How did he take it?" He asked, not wanting to enter the conversation there, right now, but he asked anyways. It had just slipped.

"He uhm," she started, not sure what to say, "he didn't, really, well, he wasn't really happy."

Luke sighed. "I'm sure."

"We haven't talked about everything yet, just, you know, general stuff."

Luke pulled her fragile body into his, holding onto her tightly. She kept her arms to her side, but rested her head against his chest, pressing her body harder into his. He kissed the top of her head, inhaling the smell of her shampoo.

"You're okay, right?"

"Mmm hmm."

"You sure?"

Arms still wrapped around her, she leaned her chin on his chest, gazing up into his eyes.

"Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"I have you. Right?"

He nodded his head confidently, pressing his cheek against hers. "You have all of me." He whispered into her ear, giving her shivers.

She smiled, holding back any sort of tears he might see, and mumbled 'good' into his ear.

"We better get back out there. In case Rory's already back."

Lorelai laughed. "That person looked awfully far if you ask me."

He leaned down, capturing her lips with his, kissing her slowly.

"I don't think that was Lane." He mumbled.

"Me either." She laughed, trying to dismiss everything else out of her mind.

He pulled away from her, holding on to her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze before opening up the door and walking back into the diner.

Lorelai came out a minute later to the still empty diner. "Do you want to head outside a little early?" She suggested.

"That sounds good. Let me tell Caesar I'm leaving for a while."

"Ok."

She sat at the counter, staring intensely at the pot of coffee in front of her. She felt ashamed and embarrassed, almost as if she couldn't look into his eyes anymore. She was afraid to see the happiness in his stare that led to the pain in her heart. She couldn't bare hurting any more people yet she continued to do it anyways.

"Do you want some?" He asked, following her stare to the coffee pot.

"Some what?" She asked.

"Coffee?"

"Oh, no, thanks though. I think I'll save myself for some founders day punch."

"That stuff will kill ya."

"Funny, you say the same thing about coffee." She smirked.

"Let's go."

They headed out into the square, Babette and Miss Patty both running up to her as soon as they spotted her. She spent a few minutes talking with the women while Luke rummaged around looking for the punch bowl to get Lorelai a cup.

"And Max is treating you good, right doll?" Babette asked.

"Yeah, he is." She said as normal as possible. "It's nice to be back here for this isn't it?" She asked nobody in particular.

"Oh it's the best time of the year." Patty laughed.

"Ah, there's Rory right over there." Lorelai gave Rory an intense come hither look. Rory walked away from Dean and Lane who both waved to Lorelai and walked over to the three women.

"Hi Patty, hi Babette."

"Hi gorgeous!" Babette said giving her a hug.

"Rory, it's nice to see you again so soon darling."

"I see you found your supplies alright," she pointed to Luke who was walking towards the girls, holding a clear cup of the bright red liquid.

"I sure did." Patty said laughing. "Hello Luke, glad to see your girls?"

Lorelai blushed, looking down at her feet at the words 'your girls.'

"Yeah, it's nice to see them," he said, grinning like crazy, "here I found you a cup of poison." He handed Lorelai the cup of punch while Patty gave him a death glare.

"We're gunna get going, kids. We just wanted to say hi and to enjoy the festival. We'll see you later on." Babette said before grabbing Patty's arm and dragging her off.

They waved goodbye, watching them both walk off. Lorelai turned to Luke and smiled, "thanks for the punch."

"Oh, no problem."

The two of them suddenly felt very shy around each other which wasn't necessarily a good thing. After all, they were in front of Rory who was watching them very closely.

"Is it okay if I go over there with Dean and Lane for a bit?" Rory asked.

"Of course. I've got Luke to entertain me." She hit him playfully on the stomach.

"Okay well come find me if you need me."

"Alright babe."

As Rory walked away, Lorelai led them to a bench by one of the random tables set up in the grass.

"So how long do you think it's going to take for them to get the bonfire lit this year?" Lorelai asked.

"Beats me. I'm sure none of these crazy people bothered bringing matches."

"But don't you think that makes it fun?"

"If you like standing around waiting for some old man to light a bunch of logs, then yeah, I guess I do."

Lorelai hit him on the leg. "I think its fun, waiting around for them to light it."

"What exactly is fun about it?"

"Hey, right about now you're ruining my fun mister."

"Sorry, I guess we just don't agree on terms of fun."

"It's not very often I get to hear you say the F word."

"The F word, huh? Is that what were calling it these days."

"F…Fun…"

"Ah, yes. I think I got you the first time."

Lorelai gazed at him, a grin playing on the corner of her lips. "I'm sorry, correct me if I'm wrong but were you mocking me?"

"I guess you'll never know now will you." He smirked.

Just then, they head a loud, familiar voice coming from ahead of them. Lorelai's face lit up the second she matched the face to the voice.

"Sookie!" She squealed.

"Lorelai!" The girls ran up to each other, hugging each other dramatically as they met in the middle.

"I miss you!"

"I miss you too!" Sookie said laughing, pulling away from Lorelai. "How are you? Ah, I feel like I haven't seen you in forever."

"Well, we've gone from seeing each other everyday to this. Pretty much the same thing if you ask me."

"It sure seems like it to me."

Sookie noticed Luke sitting on the bench watching the two girls. She waved at him, him returning the gesture with a head nod and a smile.

"So, how are things?" Sookie asked quietly.

"Things are…okay." She didn't want to get into this right now with Sookie. She would talk to her about everything, soon. Just not yet.

"Does everybody know the truth?"

"Not yet, let's just not talk about that okay?" She said hoping Sookie would drop it for the time being.

Just as Lorelai finished her sentence, Luke walked over to the two of them.

"Hey Sookie. Listen I'm going to see if Kirk needs any help with that table." He said pointing to Kirk who was dragging a table onto the grass with all his might.

"Okay, you know where to find me."

Sookie gave the two of them a look of knowledge. Luke wasn't sure who knew what and suddenly felt very uncomfortable with the look Sookie gave them. When he walked away, Lorelai walked with Sookie over to the punch bowl, getting them both new cups.

"So how are you and Jackson?" Lorelai asked, taking a sip.

"We're good. We're really good." She smiled, gazing at Jackson who was complaining with Andrew about something.

"Hi Jackson!" Lorelai called across the crowd.

Jackson turned around and saw Lorelai and Sookie talking. He smiled, walking over to the girls.

"Lorelai, how the heck are you." He said greeting her with a hug.

"I'm good Jackson, how are you?"

"I can't complain. The vegetable stocks are great."

"Well then, life is pretty damn perfect isn't it?" She laughed.

"How's the married life treating you?" He asked, clearly interested.

Sookie never told him about her and Luke. She never would have, not unless she had Lorelai's permission which she didn't. It was something she wanted to tell, at least to Jackson, but knew she had to respect Lorelai's trust to the fullest, especially with a condition like this.

"It's…you know," she said lamely, gesturing with her hands, "how's the Sookie life?"

He smiled, looking over at Sookie. "It's great." He said happily, wrapping an arm around Sookie.

Lorelai smiled, admiring the couple in front of her eyes. She longed to be that happy, for things to be that simple when she knew, they weren't going to be like that.

"I'm glad to hear it then."

"And Hartford is nice?" He asked.

"Oh, it's no Stars Hollow but yes, it's nice."

"Well then good. You'll have to come back and see us more often. We miss you around here."

"I miss you guys too." She sighed heavily. "A lot."

"Well I'm going to go over there with Andrew but I'll see you guys later."

She smiled as he walked off.

"You guys are so happy!" Lorelai reveled.

"We are." Sookie squealed. "It's just…everything's working. You know?"

"Not really," she sulked, not wanting to sit here feeling bad for herself, "I mean, yeah, I know what you mean. I'm glad you guys are so happy, Sookie. I really am."

"Thanks. Your opinion counts a lot to me."

"Well then I'm glad."

"Hey I told Patty I'd help her with something back there, you want to come with?"

Lorelai gazed at Luke walking back towards them.

"I'll come see you soon. I'm just going to talk to him for a little bit."

"Alright, I'll see you around."

"Okay, see ya Sookie."

Luke walked up to Lorelai just as Sookie was walking away. She smiled, walking towards him.

"Did you guys get the table up here successfully?"

"Yeah. I think Kirk's going to have to see a doctor for the blisters he's going to have on his hands but we got it."

Lorelai laughed, admiring the homey feeling of being back here.

"There going to light the fire soon. I saw the matches myself." Luke commented.

"_That's_ certainly a first."

"It is."

"What do you say we go on a walk before it starts?"

Luke gazed around at all the couples holding hands, arms wrapped around each other. They were all standing around the bon-fire, waiting for the annual lighting.

"Sure, let's go."

They walked out of the square towards the abandoned streets they knew nobody was on. When they were for sure out of everybody's sight, Luke reached for Lorelai's hand, intertwining his fingers within hers.

"You know, coming back here _really_ makes me miss this place."

"I bet."

"It's almost too hard to come back here." She said quietly. "I miss everyone, you know? I miss coming to the diner for breakfast every morning. I miss going to the Inn and bothering the hell out of Michel. I miss my house, my stuff, my friends, my town," she gazed around, inhaling a deep breath of air, "my everything."

Luke squeezed her hand sympathetically.

"I'm sure it's tough."

"Everything is. And you know, I'm sorry that…things are like _this_ between us."

"I know you are. But, it's better than nothing, right?"

"It is."

"Good."

Before they knew it, they were both standing in front of Lorelai's old house. She smiled sadly, walking towards the porch. She let go of his hand as they both sat down on the top step.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

She took a deep breath. "When did you develop feelings for me?"

Luke folded his hands in his lap, gazing down at his feet.

"Was it the night we first kissed?"

He laughed pathetically. She knew nothing.

After he didn't answer, she spoke again.

"Was it before that?"

He still didn't answer.

"Was it really before that?"

"The day you stopped calling me Duke." He said quickly. "That was the day I realized you had a little sensibility."

She smiled, remaining quiet.

"You called me Luke, and asked politely for coffee. I think you had something on your mind, you seemed sort of out of it."

"I did?"

"You weren't talking very much. I asked if anything was wrong and you just said that things were a little messed up at the moment."

She laughed, wondering on which occasion it was that was messed up.

"I think it had something to do with your parents. I remember you mentioning them."

"Well I'm sure that'd bring me down."

"And I felt indescribably bad for you. I felt bad from the stories you told Rory when she was little about your parents that I over head over the first few years of knowing you."

"You did?" She asked, genuinely surprised.

"I felt bad that you didn't have parents like mine. I remember specifically," he took a deep breath; "I realized I had feelings for you the day of my dark day. Well, that's when I took it into consideration, the idea of you and me."

"Your dark day?"

"The day that my dad died. Every year, I disappear on that day. I don't open the diner, well; I didn't before I didn't have any help. But I leave town for the day, don't talk to anyone, don't do anything really."

"Oh Luke."

"And it hit me that you didn't deserve to be treated so poorly by your parents. You didn't deserve the love they gave or didn't give you and I felt bad for you." He said again.

"You felt bad for me." She repeated.

"Nobody should treat you like that. Ever." He said boldly, looking into her eyes.

She smiled, holding back the tears he caused her to form. She linked her arm through his and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I'm not giving you enough attention you deserve." She mumbled quietly, a single tear rolling down her cheek.

"What you're giving me is fine for now."

"For now," she confirmed, "for now."

"What do you say we get back?" He whispered. "We can catch the lighting and then I'll probably have to wrap it up and head back to the diner."

"Yeah, sorry, let's go." She said wiping her cheek.

He gazed down at her, not aware that she had been crying. He smiled softly, kissing her tear stained cheek.

They got off the porch, walking slowly down the steps and back into town. He wrapped his arm around her, holding her closely too him until they got back into the visible eye of the town.

They made it look like they had come from the diner, as the walked back to the square. Everybody was gathered around the bon-fire, waiting for it to be lit.

"We're not late." Lorelai laughed as they strolled up to the large group.

"Towns people," Taylor said into the microphone, "we gather here right now, united as one big town in the annual lighting of the bon-fire."

The town clapped and cheered, ready for it to be lit. "I have the match right here in my hand," he said holding it up, "waiting to be li--"

A gust of wind knocked the match out of Taylor's hand, landing somewhere on the grass below him.

"It fell." He said obviously.

"It what?" Harry asked, looking over at Taylor, angrily.

The town booed, with the exception of some laughter as Taylor asked through the microphone, "does anybody have a match on them?"

The town sighed, letting out a frustrated and yet loud no.

xx

The girls left a few minutes after the actual lighting. Luke had to get back as well as Dean and Lane. They got to see the initial lighting, 20 minutes after the scheduled time. Kirk went and got the child proof lighter his mom kept in the back of the drawer in their kitchen. He announced himself the savior of the festival.

"That was fun." Lorelai laughed, walking into the door.

"It was! I can't believe Kirk went home to get a lighter."

"I think he was our only hope, sadly."

They walked into the living room where Max was pacing back and forth, uncomfortably. "Oh hi, how was the festival?" He asked, interested.

"It was great," Lorelai started, "we had to wait 20 minutes for them to light the bon-fire but it was fun as always."

"Good, that's good." He said, seeming somewhat rushed.

"It was."

Rory walked over to the edge of the couch where her backpack rested, lifting it up and walking back towards her mom.

"So I have a question," Max started, "I was thinking about the day and realized you had class tonight didn't you?" Lorelai's mind started racing, practically forgetting what day it was that she had 'class.'

"I uh, oh yeah, you know what, look at that. I did, didn't I?" She said, laughing nervously. "Yep, its Thursday isn't it. I did, man, that's not good. We were going to learn how to uhm, pick the correct 'welcome mats' for a homey country inn." She lied.

"I thought you did." He said confidently. "Wait, actually…"

"Yeah?"

"Wait, no, you have them Monday's, Wednesday's, and Friday's I thought?"

"Wait, ha, look at that, you thought right. Ding, ding, ding, we've got ourselves a winner over here!" She said getting more and more caught up in her lies by the minute.

He arched an eyebrow, looking at Lorelai confused. "Is there something you want to tell me, Lorelai?" He asked in a tone that made her want to spill everything.

"No." She said quickly. "Well, yes." She bounced back and forth. "Rory go to your room please." She said pointedly.

"Is everything okay?" Rory asked, concerned.

"Yes. Well, no, but Rory just go to your room."

"No, I think Rory should stay here." Max said matter of factly.

"I think she should go to her room." She said forcefully.

"One way or another, she's going to find out now." He said, pointing out the obvious.

She knew he was on to something. She had to let it out because she was way too far in deep now. There was no turning back. Even if she tried.

"There is no class." She blurted.

"There's what?" Max asked, his voice somewhat rising.

"I've been lying," she started out quickly, "I haven't been going to a class for the past month or two."

"Well then where have you been?" He asked accusingly.

"I've been with Luke." She bit her lip, squeezing her eyes closed tight, terrified to see his reaction.

She cursed at herself over and over in her mind. That _was not_ supposed to happen. That was NOT supposed to come out of her mouth.

"Excuse me?" He asked, loudly. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Uh, Rory I'd really like it if you would go to your room now."

Rory, who dropped her backpack moments ago, had no words. "I, uh," she started.

"Rory, stay here. I think there's something Lorelai wants to tell us."

"Lorelai?" Lorelai asked, terrified that he called her that.

"What do you mean you've been with Luke?"

She took a deep breath, the butterflies going crazy in her stomach. She thought she was going to throw up, she was that nervous.

"Max, I don't know what to say."

"I don't get it Lorelai. I don't get what you're saying." He said, clearly on to something.

"There are no classes!" She screamed. "There are no classes, there are no over night orientations, there are no DAR meetings at the Inn, there's nothing!" She screamed.

"You've been lying to me about everything?" He asked.

"Yes." She said quietly.

"And instead you were with Luke."

"Yes."

"With Luke doing what? Helping him at the diner, working?"

"Max, I am _with_ Luke," she bit on her bottom lip, thinking any minute now the bleeding would begin, "I have been Max, ever since the day before our wedding."

"You _what?_" He barked.

Her lip trembled beneath her, wanting nothing more than to hold onto her daughter who looked scared out of her mind. Lorelai held her head in her hands, sitting down on the couch, suddenly no longer able to stand if her life depended on it.

"You mean you are _with _Luke."

She nodded her head, not looking up.

"This whole time, since the day before you vowed to be with me forever, you have been with Luke."

"Yes."

"Did you sleep with him the night before our wedding, Lorelai?"

She knew her answer would kill him. She couldn't stand seeing his reaction to this. Rory's either. But it was like watching a scary part of a movie, despite having someone's body to hide your face in, you had to watch it.

"I have Max. Over and over again." She said softly.

At this point the truth was spilling out by the second. She couldn't hold on to her depressive lies any longer. She had no reason to say some things and not the others, as long as she was going through with this.

His face went pale, as did Rory's. He swallowed the huge lump forming in his throat.

"Why?" He asked in a craze.

"Why what?"

"Why did you do this to me? Hell, not only to me but to your family Lorelai. The people that _love_ you. I'm sure he doesn't love you the way we do." He said positively.

"Don't you say that," she said pathetically, "it's not a contest of who loves who more, Max."

"Why did you marry me?" He said, lowering his voice. "Why did you tell me you've loved me all this time, and agreed to marry me after you went through with that?"

She couldn't hold in the tears any longer. They were burning her eyes too badly that it was almost hard to see.

"I didn't _expect_ it, Max." She said, the tears rolling down her cheeks quickly. "I didn't know any of this was going to happen and I certainly didn't plan on continuing it after the first night we made love. Do you think that this is something I planned? Cause I didn't Max, I didn't plan on hurting you, or…her," she pointed to Rory, "or…him"

Rory looked back and forth between her mom and Max, having to take a seat herself. She didn't know what to think besides the obvious that she wish this wasn't happening.

"Do you love him?" He asked quietly.

"I lov_ed_ you, Max. I did."

He gritted his teeth, ignoring what she had previously said.

"Lorelai do you love him?"

The tears started coming down faster and faster, her breathing becoming staggered as well.

"I…"

"Yes or no."

"Yes," she gasped for air, "I am in love with him."

"And do you want to be with him?" He asked, his voice suddenly becoming louder again.

"Mom?" Rory asked.

She looked over at her shocked daughter, breaking her insides even more so. "Oh Rory." She sighed.

"Do you want to be with him or not?" Max repeated.

"I don't know what I want…" she said, tapping her foot impatiently on the floor as she watched him stare straight into her eyes. "I want…" she started, trying to calm the crying down, "I need him." She said quietly, shoving her face in her hands again.

That was all Max needed to hear. He gave her one last stone cold look, waiting for her to look up and see him. A matter of minutes later, she looked up and noticed Max's vivid facial expression staring at her in the face. She swallowed and started speaking, "I'm so sor--"

Before she could finish her sentence, Max had walked out of the room and left the house, slamming the door behind him which resulted in Lorelai crying even harder.

She looked up and started at her daughter who looked like she had been torn into a thousand pieces. Rory didn't know what to do or say. Lorelai held her stare for a long while before Rory got up and left the living room, slamming her bedroom door behind her.

She knew no matter how much she tried, she wouldn't be able to stop crying tonight. And it wasn't as if the hard part was certainly over. She had to tell Luke the truth. She suspected it wouldn't be as bad as this, at least she hoped.

She leaned back against the couch, silently crying to herself.

In between gasps of air, she was able to make out one word to herself. "Luke," she mumbled quietly, "Luke." She repeated, as her hair falling into her face as she held herself tightly.

* * *

Honk if you miss Gilmore girls.

Leave a review, please! See you in a month. ;) Hopefully…well, hopefully I'm kidding.

Hugs! x


	7. Pulling Over

**Who Lies Beneath?**

**Disclaimer: **If there has been one consistent thing about this story, it would be the fact that I have never owned anything.

**Summary:** LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend...She's made many mistakes before, but which ones the mistake this time? The wedding or the night before?

**Authors Note:** I owe everyone a very big apology! It's taken forever to get this, the _last_ chapter up. I'm so sorry and I know that seems like nothing but it's taken a lot to get this chapter out of me! Plus I was gone for a week (in Canada, meeting my fabulous partner herself, Annick) and it would have been cool if we could have actually written together but no, that didn't work, haha.

So here it is for you. The last piece of this crazy puzzle. We never warned anyone that the next chapter would be the last but surely, it is. I figured if I didn't just write this as one big chapter, it would probably take another three months for you guys to hear from us so here it is.

Seriously, you guys have been amazing readers this whole time! Never mind the fact that it's taken just about five months to write seven chapters, you guys have been awesome from day one. The feedback and reviews were amazing, we were both truly blown away! Thank you for everything, trust me when I say it means **_a lot_** and if it weren't for you, I would have zero motivation whatsoever to write. Heh, I sort of feel like I won an award and this is my speech. Okay the shutting up will begin any second.

So thanks again for everything, enjoy the last chapter and please leave a review to let us know what you thought.

Look back soon for another story from us (soon!) written by Annick this time. ;) It will be posted under the fanfiction login catfightsproductions.

And **Annick,** you already know how much I fancy you.

Read & Review? Merci beaucoup!

xx

_Maybe it's just me, but you seem finally happy  
__I don't think I've seen your face just glow like a neon sign.  
__And maybe we should be alone for ever after  
__Cause even though the nights are long  
__At least I'll make it another day._

_Cause I can't live if you're not happy  
__I can't live if you cry  
__But I can live without you if it makes you smile._

_--_

_**Where we left off...**_

_Before she could finish her sentence, Max had walked out of the room and left the house, slamming the door behind him which resulted in Lorelai crying even harder._

_She looked up and stared at her daughter who looked like she had been torn into a thousand pieces. Rory didn't know what to do or say. Lorelai held her stare for a long while before Rory got up and left the living room, slamming the bedroom door behind her._

_She knew no matter how much she tried, she wouldn't be able to stop crying tonight. And it wasn't as if the hard part was certainly over. She had to tell Luke the truth. She suspected it wouldn't be as bad as this, at least she hoped._

_She leaned back against the couch, silently crying to herself._

_In between gasps of air, she was able to make out one word to herself. "Luke," she mumbled quietly, "Luke." She repeated, as her hair fell into her face as she held herself tightly._

There was no point in feeling sorry for herself.

She knew from the first night she kissed Luke Danes, life would never be the same again.

The second their lips touched, she was positive nothing good would result from this.

Well, sure some good things would be a result. That being every second spent with Luke. But she knew she was married and it couldn't possibly be healthy. Or right.

What struck her (probably Rory, Max and Luke too) as odd is that she never, not in a million years, would have suspected herself to commit something such as an affair.

But the word affair is so very Jerry Springer. She likes to think of it more as...clandestine meetings? Well they never agreed on times or places.

She thought of it more as her own special sanctuary. Being with Luke was a feeling that took over her body, mind, and head. Despite the way he made her feel, she was still disgusted with herself.

So as she sat there crying in the sleeves of her now damp, long sleeve shirt, there was no feeling bad for herself. She knew what she did was wrong and quite frankly, she knew the consequences the whole time.

But then the secretiveness was always a safe feeling. Up until this moment, she had never mentally imagined what today, the day of confrontation, would look like. She never scared herself away by the thoughts of her family slamming doors on her, not being able to listen to one more measly apology that to them, meant nothing.

They didn't want to hear her apologies. Not right now. It was a lot to take in, and she wanted to accept that. She wanted to give both Max and Rory time to themselves to adjust to the news but patience was never something Emily Gilmore taught Lorelai. It was never something taught by a friend, a teacher, an idol on television, nobody.

And though she wanted to respect their wish for time (though it was never officially stated that they need it, at least for now) she couldn't. She wanted to apologize and most of all she wanted forgiveness though she knew that was a hell of a lot to ask out of either of them.

Her breathing decreased from the rapid speed it flowed out of her mouth. Tucking her hands within the tear-stained sleeves of her shirt, she lifted her right hand to her eyes, wiping underneath the both of them in attempt to clear away some of the blotted mascara.

She closed her eyes, clenching her teeth tightly, subconsciously forming fists pointing towards mid-air, pointing at nothing in specific.

She knew if she wanted to get up, that it would certainly be a challenge. She gripped onto the side of the couch, holding on as tight as possible for support to keep her from falling. Standing perfectly still and tall (though right now she felt like the shortest person in the world) in the air, she paused before attempting to walk. Her legs grew weak at the mere thought of making short strides through the kitchen, to the back room. What has been and still is, Rory's room.

Opening her eyes, would be a good thing, she figured. She took the first step towards the right direction. As she slowly walked towards the kitchen, she felt like she was walking on quick sand. Each step felt like she was seeping lower and lower into the millions of grains of sand. They were her new calling and trying to trap her at any given point.

She reached the door of her daughters room, resting her hand quietly on the knob before beginning to open it. She told herself not to open the door. Better just to knock. But she didn't have the strength to lift her arm up and knock lightly on her daughters door.

Instead she reminded herself about the time issue. She removed her hand from the door, pressing her back against the wall closest by.

She leaned all her weight against the wall, sliding slowly down the scratchy form of concrete. She bundled her face again against her hands, hoping her daughter would come out of her room soon.

She didn't want to fall asleep in this position, though sleep probably wasn't going to be an option tonight.

It felt like hours as she sat pinned up against the wall. She was a mess and she knew it. There were rarely any times she was like..._this._ Right now, she couldn't think of any other times, probably cause there weren't that many times she was this bad.

She had tuned a lot of things out in the past...well, the past being however long she's been out here. Tuning out sound was one of those things but she did look up when she thought she heard a door open.

Sure enough, Rory was standing a mere few inches away from her broken mother sitting against the wall.

"Mom?" She questioned, "are you okay?" What a silly question to ask at a time like this.

"Rory." She said, hardly above a whisper. She wanted to talk to her, to apologize, and knowing that she had the time, she wasn't going to throw it away.

Rory didn't need to say anything. She offered a hand to her mother and pulled her up on to her two feet, holding her hand for a minute while Lorelai waited for her weak knees to grow strong.

Lorelai, still holding on to Rory's hand led them into her room. Lorelai sat down on Rory's bed, clutching tightly onto a pillow as Rory stood above her mother, waiting for her to speak.

She probably wasn't in the best state _to _talk but she figured her apology would be most meaningful when she was in this sort of condition.

"Rory, I..." her voice, scratchy from all the crying, stung like a steaming cup of coffee swallowed down the wrong tube in her throat, "I don't know where to begin."

Rory sat down on the foot of her bed staring at her mother, waiting for her to speak. She was furious. She was upset. She was sad. She was mad. But she couldn't help but feel bad for her best friend, her mother, as she watched her sit on her bed trying to apologize to the best of her ability.

"I know." Rory offered.

"No, you don't know Rory. I don't even know where to begin. I don't know what I can say or...or, what I can do to...I just, I don't know."

Rory paused, looking for the right thing to say. "We don't have to do this now, mom."

"Yes we do," Lorelai wiped away the remainder of her tears, trying her absolute hardest to look strong and determined, ready to give Rory this speech of forgiveness.

"I feel...horrible. I feel, disgusted, terrible, just...absolutely...horrible that I was the one who tore apart a family."

It sounded somewhat lame. It did. But it was the truth. And it was only just the start.

"I never...intended to hurt anyone. Not you, Max...not Luke. And that might sound like the wrong thing to say right now but I didn't picture this coming from me. I didn't. I'm not...I'm not the kind of person who would do something like this but there are just some things in life that you really cannot explain. I don't know what has come over me these past few months. I loved Max. I was so happy to marry him. But I just spent one night with Luke and...I hate to say it now, but it changed everything. And it changed everything after it was all too late. And, I know, I screwed up, I mean, we're calling second place right after getting pregnant at 16 but look at how you turned out. I couldn't have asked for a sweeter, smarter, more beautiful daughter than I have. And, I'm not saying mistakes are all about a wonderful outcome. I'm not. But Rory, you have to understand that what I did was unintentional. I didn't mean to hurt you, I didn't mean to hurt Max. And I know, this all sounds so repetitive. And I could go on and on about how sorry I am and how I didn't mean for any of this to happen but I've got to face the truth. What happened, happened and I know it's probably painful for you. It's painful for me just knowing I caused you to hurt. And I know this hasn't covered everything, and I haven't talked about everything with you but...I don't know."

She took a deep breath, clenching her hands against the pillow. She looked back into her daughters eyes.

"You know, as I was sitting against that wall earlier, I was thinking about how badly I wanted you to forgive me. I wanted you to...understand, and adapt easier then you probably will but up until now, I never once thought about how selfish that was of me." She closed her eyes, fighting the tears from pouring out. "I want you to forgive me. One day. For lying, for...betraying you and this family, for everything. And you are a wonderful kid. I have no doubt in my mind that one day this will be behind us no matter how horrible it may be but I don't need anything from you now. I just...I think, I should give you time. It's been a long night. And I should probably go find Max and say all the same things to him but I don't know where he is and..."

"You're probably not in the best state to drive in, either."

"Probably not."

They were both quiet, Rory unable to come up with something to say. She knew her mother wanted to hear something. Anything, really.

"You know, I don't hate you."

Lorelai laughed pathetically, "I hope you don't."

"I know...I know you didn't mean to do this. And I don't know, I almost feel as if I am being...mean to Max when saying this but...we'll get over it. It's not the end of the world. I guess it's just...so very unexpected. Never mind all the details, being when it started, how long it lasted...specifically _who_ it was with," she said referring to Luke, "but...things happen. I'll be fine mom, I know I will be."

"I know you will be."

"But I don't know about...," she pointed her head towards the door of her room somewhat indicating she was speaking about Max, "...but, just give it some time."

Lorelai shook her head understandingly, letting go of the pillow and leaning over, wrapping her arms tightly around her daughter, enveloping her into a hug.

"I love you, Rory." She whispered into her ear.

Rory tightened her grip around her mothers shoulders, whispering back, "I love you too, mom."

Whether it be their best friend instinct or their mother-daughter bond, Rory could never hurt her mother knowing simply because couldn't forgive her. She felt almost as if she was betraying Max but whenever she thought about that, she thought about the person who was there for her since day one. The person who raised her to be the understanding, forgiving person she is in the first place.

Lorelai.

xx

They didn't say much more before Lorelai went to her room. Lorelai knew what she said was enough. It was Max she should be giving the apology to. But she did owe her daughter something to and she figured she got that much done. It was the first step to...well, to wherever this was going.

She knew that Rory would forgive her for her actions. Sure Rory didn't say much in return to her speech but what she said was enough and she appreciated the things that she _did_ say.

Lorelai, laying restless in _their _bed, had no idea where Max could be. She wasn't sure where he was, who he was with, or when he'd be home. She didn't even bother calling his cell phone. It was late and he wanted to be alone. She knew at least that much.

She tried closing her eyes, hoping she could get some rest because the days activities had eaten her alive. But every time she closed her eyes, she saw him.

He would be mad too.

She lied to him as well.

And she knew she had to tell him soon enough.

But when she closed her eyes, she saw a happy Luke and it killed her to know she'd have to let him down one last time.

She wasn't sure where things would go from here. She couldn't stay with Max. She _wouldn't_ stay with him. She knew that she had ruined any chance she had to be happy, at least for now. She broke her husbands heart and it was too late and things were too deep to be fixed.

The word divorce rang loudly through her head. It hurt her to think about it but at this point just about everything did.

She just didn't expect Max to question her. She had no idea he was suspicious about anything. She was going to tell him, she was, but it wasn't supposed to happen like that.

She was going to sit him down, alone, probably somewhere private too. She was going to tell him she was sorry, that she never planned on anything like this happening, that she would take it back if she could.

But then it hit her, hard and painful, that she probably would not take it back if she could. Would she have stopped it if she saw it coming, probably. But would she take it back after everything had already happened? Probably not. She was too involved with Luke. She experienced a side of him that not many people got to experience. And most of all, she got to experience a side of her she had never before seen.

She didn't know when she'd talk to him next though. Right now, she didn't really _want_ to confront him. She wanted to talk to Max first, explain to him how things had gotten so messed up (though to be honest, she wasn't necessarily sure) and figure out where things were going to go from here.

She knew Luke wouldn't be her quick rebound man, despite the fact that they have history pre-splitting up with Max. So maybe rebound wasn't the correct word but she felt almost too embarrassed to run straight to Luke after everything ended here.

Taking it one day at a time was a good idea, she thought.

She tried her absolute hardest to fall asleep that night, hoping she wouldn't be haunted with either one of their faces during her sleep. If you want to call it that.

xx

It was about 7 when she woke up the next morning. As soon as she opened her eyes, she closed them again tightly, hoping that when she'd open them again she'd see Max in the bed with her, signaling that everything that happened last night was a nightmare. She opened her eyes shortly after though, things in the same way as they were when she opened her eyes a moment before.

She looked at the clock, the red solid numbers blinking 7:02. She sat up, looking out her bedroom window to see if Max's car was pulled into the driveway but it wasn't. She leaned against the headboard, grabbing her cell phone from her night stand.

_One voicemail._

Clicking the four digit password for her voicemail, she pressed the phone to the side of her ear, butterflies in her stomach already.

"_Hey Lorelai, it's me. I'm sure you're still sleeping but I was just calling to let you know that you left your glasses here a few days ago. I forgot to bring them down to the festival last night but I figured you'd want them so...you know, you can stop by whenever is good for you to pick them up. I'll see you soon. Call me."_

She pressed seven, informing the friendly voicemail services to delete the message. His voice hit her heard, making her head dizzy. She figured she needed to get out of this daze sooner or later, sooner being the better option.

She pulled the covers off of her, wobbling into the bathroom before walking down the hall to the kitchen. Rory was in the kitchen, clad in her uniform, eating breakfast before on her way to school.

"Hey," Lorelai said quietly, walking into the kitchen, pouring herself a cup of the already made coffee.

"Oh, morning," Rory smiled softly.

"Ready for school?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

Lorelai looked around the house, searching for Max though she knew very well he wasn't there. She sat down across from Rory, taking a large sip of coffee. "So, uhm, you haven't heard from...have you?"

Rory shook her head.

"Okay, well, do you need a ride to school today?"

"I'll take the bus, I'm ready a little early and everything..."

"Are you sure? Cause I can just take you whenever you're ready."

"No, it's fine. I'm fine."

Lorelai nodded her head, not bothering to persuade Rory differently.

"So I'll see you after school?"

Rory got up from her chair, placing her bowl and cup into the sink. "It's newspaper layout night. I probably won't be home until 9 or so."

"Oh okay, well call me when you want to be picked up, okay?"

"Okay, mom." She walked towards Lorelai, giving her a hug goodbye.

"Thanks babe." She whispered.

xx

Deciding to be productive for the day, Lorelai cleaned the house to the best of her ability. She did the dishes (by hand - she never did learn how to use this dishwasher), did a few loads of laundry, vacuumed every room in the house, and finally put away her clothes that had been in a chair in the corner for a few weeks now.

She of course, still heard no word from Max. A small part of her wanted to call Rory and find out if he was at school. Max never missed a day of work. In all her time being with him she never once recalled him taking a day off or missing a day because he was sick.

She hoped he would be there, the status somewhat telling her that it wasn't as big of a deal as she thought it was even though she knew the circumstances were larger than she wanted to admit.

She looked at the clock, it was noon. If on cue, right as she glanced up to look at the time her cell phone started ringing, the obnoxious, once funny ring echoed through the now clean kitchen.

His name flashed across the front screen, her fingers on the edge of lifting open the folder of her phone. She wasn't sure if she wanted to answer right now. She didn't think talking to him would be a good idea but she knew she couldn't avoid him forever.

She pressed the button on the side of her phone, indicating the phones silence. She set it back down on the counter before taking a seat in the wooden, rather uncomfortable chair.

She waited a few minutes before she grabbed her phone to see if Luke had left a message.

_Two voicemails._

Damnit.

'_Hey it's me again...I was just wondering what you were doing, just making sure you got my message from earlier. Call me when you can, hope everything's fine with you. Talk to you later.'_

'To erase this message, press seven now.'

_Click._

'Next voice message.'

'_It's me...again. Listen, if you have time to stop by today that would be great. I want to show you something so just come on over if you're around.'_

'To erase this message, press seven now.'

_Click._

xx

If it weren't for Luke's consistency, she probably would have slept face down on the kitchen table straight through the whole day.The phone rang loudly in her ear as she tossed her hand on the counter, searching for the ringing phone.

"Hello?" She mumbled into the phone, not bothering to look at who it was.

"Finally, you answer your phone."

Lorelai opened her eyes, lifting her head up from the kitchen table. She took her free hand and gently massaged the back of her neck which was now in pain from her little cat-nap on the rough table.

"Oh, hey Luke," her voice was quiet, giving off vibes of suspicion.

"Are you okay?" He lowered his voice, backing into the storage room away from the customers, "you sound like something's wrong."

"Well..."

"Is everything okay?" He pestered.

She took a minute before answering. She wasn't sure how long she could, or even wanted tokeep this from Luke. She figured now was as good a time as ever.

"Actually, it's not."

"Are you okay?" He asked quickly.

"I'm...well, no I'm not. I actually need to talk to you."

"I have time, you can talk."

"No, no, I need to..._talk_ to you. I need to talk to you in person, Luke."

He felt his stomach drop, afraid of where this was leading. He had no idea what was coming but he knew it was bad from the tone of her voice.

"Well, I'm free whenever you need me to be. Do you want to go to the diner? Do you want me to meet you somewhere?"

She scanned the room looking at the small numbers on the microwave. _1:03._ "I can come to the diner," she said apprehensively, "is now okay?"

"If it's okay for you."

"Okay then I'll see you soon."

"Alright, bye Lorelai."

"Yeah, bye."

She pressed end, instantly regretting the fast paced conversation they just had. She had to go to _the diner._ To see _Luke._ She looked like crap, eyes swollen and even a little red from all the crying she had done and lack of sleep she received.She had no motivation to put on something cute or make her face look a wee bit more presentable.

She went upstairs to her room, nervous to do just that much, and opened the closet slowly. She pulled out a zip up sweatshirt, throwing it on over her tee-shirt. She kept the yoga-like pants she was wearing on and put on a pair of flip-flops, throwing her hair back into a knot.

She almost felt numb. Totally and completely numb. It was as if her mind was trying to black out. She tried not thinking, because thinking too hard was the last thing she needed at a time like this. If she actually thought about things, like whatto say to Luke for instance, she would probably scare herself out of going to see him. And she knew she had to do at least that much right about now.

The drive to Stars Hollow was longer than usual. Maybe because she was driving five under the speed limit or maybe because she just told herself to try her absolute hardest to delay the car ride. She didn't want to practice lines out in her head. She didn't want a speech. She simply wanted to go there, tell him the truth, and apologize.

She didn't know where things would go from here for the two of them. She knew, deep in her heart what she wanted. She wasn't afraid to admit it to herself either. She wanted Luke, and she wanted him more than anything. But she was afraid that by telling him the truth, he would back away from her. He would take himself out of this...calling, this...game, and tell her he can't deal with it anymore. She was afraid that by actually being able to have him, without being 'with' someone else, was too much for her.

It sounded stupid, that she knew, but she didn't always have the clearest more educated thoughts. She was terrified that by being able to have him, she'd fail him. And most of all, she'd be the one to fail them as a couple.

Despite how much her heart told her she felt for him, she still had these feelings that she couldn't control.

She pulled into the back alley of the diner. She wasn't in the mood to see _anyone_ she knew. She parked in her secret parking spot, slowly getting out of the car, not bothering to lock the door behind her. She leaned against the door of her car before making her way to the back door of the diner.

There were two doors actually. One led directly into the kitchen, the other into the small hallway that led to the case of stairs that led up to his apartment. She went through that door, the one further on the left, trying to be as quiet as possible.

Though nobody else heard her, Luke did. He was expecting her and was absolutely positive it was her when he heard the door shut. He told Caesar ahead of time he would be heading upstairs soon and that if he needed anything to simply knock on the door.

He met her in the small hall, silently taking her hand and leading her up the stairs. The curtains blocked the view of the many loud and nosey customers.

He closed the door behind himself, watching her pace back and forth in the kitchen.

"Hey," he offered, placing his hands in his back pockets.

"Hi," her voice was weak, quiet, and scratchy from the painful throat-ache she was experiencing. If she didn't know the reasoning, she'd think she was catching a case of strep throat, "sorry to come on such short notice."

"It's not a problem, really."

"Okay, good."

The whole time she had been looking down. Down at her feet, down at the floor. She slowly averted her eyes to his, a confused face staring at his. Her brow creased drastically, she examined the way his day old stubble and small bags underneath his eyes characterized him to his fullest.

He knew something was wrong from the second he first saw her face. Well he knew way before, when he talked to her on the phone first, too. He knew this wasn't going to be a pleasant visit and the anticipation was thick in the air.

"So tell me, what's the matter?" He asked, breaking eye contact with her.

A long pause drifted through the air as Lorelai tried to come up with the right thing to say. "I...I have something that...that I need to talk to you about."

"Are you okay?" The way she was talking almost seemed as if she was...dare he say, drunk. The still confused face she wore was worrying him even more so.

"Luke, I lied to you."

He bit his lip, his reaction settling in as he stared at her. He wasn't sure what she was talking about but he knew it wasn't something good.

Well, of course.

"What do you mean?"

"I never told Max." She said quickly. A little too quickly. "Well, no, that's not true. I mean, I did tell Max. But, I...well, crap, this isn't how this was supposed to go either." She said, more or less to herself.

"What are you talking about, Lorelai?"

"Remember when I came to your apartment that afternoon. I told you that I told Max, that he knew about us."

"Right..."

"Well, I lied. I never told him. I wasn't sure when I was going to tell him either--"

"You didn't tell him," he repeated.

"No, I didn't. Well, he knows now but--"

"Because you finally told him?"

"Well he sort of...found out. I mean he didn't _know-know_ anything, but he had suspicions and I ended up telling him last night, after we got home from the festival actually..."

"Huh." He mumbled, looking down at the floor before looking back up at Lorelai. "Why did you lie?" He asked, his voice still calm.

"I...I don't know why Luke."

"You could have just told me he didn't know, you know that right?"

"Of course I know that."

"So why didn't you save yourself the pain, never mind me or Max or anyone, and just tell me the truth." He didn't _mean_ for the things he said to come off as harsh. He tried to be civil with her, truly interested in what she had to say.

"Sorry, I didn't know you were such a fan of Max." She barked, commenting on his last sentence.

"Lorelai, don't..."

"I don't know what came over me Luke. I was just...I just thought it would be better if I told you that I told Max. And I mean, it wasn't like I was planning on keeping it from him forever. I was going to tell him, and soon. But I just...I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to tell him. I didn't know how to let him down. I didn't want to hurt him," the sentence lingered on her tongue, "I didn't want to hurt anyone."

Luke stayed quiet, not sure what to say. He knew if he had any shot of being with her in the long run, he couldn't just blow up in her face. "What did he say?"

She closed her eyes, trying to hold back the tears. "He was...furious. He was hurt, and...and sad, and mad at me. I haven't seen him since he left the house last night."

"Man."

"And I mean, I don't know. I don't know where anything is going from here, Luke. But I wanted you to know that I'm sorry for lying about it in the first place."

"I just don't understand why you had to lie about it."

She was leaving something out, she knew she had to say. But she wasn't ready to say it yet. She wasn't ready to put the last puzzle piece into place. She had something important to say, something that would solve all of his questions.

She'd say it soon.

A moment later, someone knocked on the door.

"Boss? I need you to come downstairs. It's getting crazy down there." Caesar shouted from the hall.

"Alright, I'll be done in a minute."

"Okay, come as soon as you can."

They listened to hear Caesar leave the hallway, walking back down the stairs into the diner.

"I should get going, he sounded like he really needed me."

"Luke, I..."

"I'll talk to you later," he opened the door, holding it open for her to walk out. She knew it was her time to leave and she knew she had missed out on saying the one thing that could have potentially fixed things more than they both knew.

She walked down the stairs, not looking back to see or say something to Luke. She had nothing left to say anymore and right now, it was all about missed opportunities and waiting till _the next time._

xx

It was close to four forty five when she heard somebody rattle with their keys in the front door lock. She knew who it was and it brought hardcore flips and tumbles to her stomach. She glanced at the clock, acknowledging the fact that it was his normal time coming home, when he was at Chilton.

She was sitting on the couch in the living room, the first room on the left when you walk into the house. She knew there was no way he could avoid her.

It felt like an eternity before he was in her view. He looked bad. He looked like he didn't get much sleep and she instantly noticed he wasn't wearing very school appropriate clothes. She figured he was though, noticing his tie in tact. He always kept a spare pair of clothes in his trunk, just in case there was a mishap with the clothes he was wearing. She figured that was the outfit he had saved away and somewhere along the way, it had gotten a little wrinkly.

It almost seemed like a scene straight out of a movie. He stood at the entry looking straight at Lorelai in the same position she was in when he left the house not even twenty four hours ago. She held his gaze, afraid to say something and scared she had nothing to say all at the same time.

"Lorelai," he acknowledged her presence first, nodding his head in her direction.

She got the shivers from simply hearing his voice. It made her nervous just to hear him speak.

"Max," he could tell by the way she spoke that her voice was shaking, "you're here."_ Way to state the obvious._

"Yeah, I am." His voice was cold but you could tell he wasn't purposely trying to talk like that. His face showed things differently. She could tell by looking at him that he had just as bad a night as she did.

Part of her wanted to give him a hug. She knew it sounded silly but it didn't stop here from feeling that way. She knew though if she even tried to do that, it would come off as some sort of pity invitation. That he understood she felt horrible but things still hadn't changed.

"Rory's still at school. She has newspaper until nine."

"Yeah," she said softly, "she told me that this morning."

"Yeah, just reminding you. You know, in case you forgot."

"No, no. I didn't forget." This was awkward, she thought. She figured their shouldn't be anymore beating around the bush. She should just talk to him about things and now seemed like a good time. "Max, uhm, could you sit down?"

"Why not." He walked over to the chair across from the couch and took a seat. He figured being away from her was better for him.

She studied his face before speaking. "Max, I...I am lost on things to say."

"You don't have to say anything, really."

She knew that wasn't what he wanted to hear; nothing. He wanted to hear everything, she knew it, and she was going to give it to him.

"You know that's not true. I owe you...everything, Max. It's just, this is hard for me. And I'm sure it's hard for you to sit here, waiting to hear what I have to say also. It's just...I've never imagined myself in this kind of position, you know?"

"Yeah, I never pictured myself in this position either. Especially not with you." Being brutally honest was the correct thing to do right now.

"I get that. And I think that's why it's so hard for all of us. It's just, this isn't very Lorelai-like. And I know, I am a woman of many surprises, but Max...despite how I feel about...him, this still is unacceptable. And yes, I'm incredibly aware that...that means just about nothing right about now, but I want you to know, I know what I did was wrong. I do."

"I'm sure you know very well that what you did was wrong, Lorelai."

"It's just that...I feel like there are only so many things I can say before you get bored and start rolling your eyes. I mean Max, I cannot even begin to apologize as much as I should be. You know that I never, ever meant to hurt you. I was so happy to marry you, I was looking so forward to finally have somebody who I could always depend on and all because of one single night, everything, all my wishes for the future that we'd bring as a family, that was all ruined. And I didn't even ruin it for me worst of all, I ruined it for you and Rory too. And it kills me to know that I made such a large mistake, that ruined everything."

Max folded his hands in his lap, leaning against the back of his chair thinking hard about what to say in return. "I understand."

Lorelai looked at him dumbly, waiting for him to say something else but he didn't. "That's all?" She asked, confused.

"What do you mean?"

"All you have to say is you understand?"

"Well it's better than I don't understand, isn't it?"

"That was too easy. Max, you should be...furious at me. You should have more to say. Really, don't hold back on my account.

_And maybe things get weird, after all that went down  
__Things were oh so clear that I could never get this right  
__So tell me what your plans are  
__And tell me what you're doing  
__The only thing I hold against me is a picture of you tonight._

_Cause I can't live if you're not happy.  
__I can't live if you cry.  
__But I can live without you if it makes you smile._

"Lorelai," he leaned forward in the chair, leaning in closer to her, "I had the wildest wishes for us as a family. I couldn't wait to marry you. I am crazy about you, I have been since the first day we met at Chilton, and I think you know that very well. But just because I'm not screaming at you right now, screaming obscene things I would probably regret saying later, doesn't mean I'm not upset. I am crushed, I really am. But just as unlikely as it is for you to be doing something like is, is just as unlikely for me to overreact and scream and put up a fight for you. Yes, I know that yesterday I sort of did blow up, and as crazy as it may sound to you, I did feel bad yelling and demanding answers like that. But I thought last night, about_ a lot _of things. And one of the things I realized is that...as much as I want to put a stand up for you, to fight for you to see what I see, I know that's never going to happen. And I think, I've just got to accept it. Just like you have to accept the fact that you chose Luke at the wrong time instead of sitting here, feeling sorry for me, Rory, Luke...and even yourself. I love you Lorelai, you know that, but I don't think this is something that should have to drag on. Because as much as I'd love to be with _you_, even for the smallest amount of time that I could get, I know it's not going to happen. And I know that there's no point in even trying, and now that I know that, I think that I'm just going to accept it. You chose him over me and I understand that."

A small tear rolled down the corner of Lorelai's face. She instantly tried to prevent any other tears from escaping her eyes. She looked down, wiping her eye quickly.

"I just...don't want you to think that I _ever_ regretted being with you. We were engaged for a while, dating even longer before that, and during those times, I did nothing but thoroughly enjoy our times together. And you know what, I'll be honest with you, I don't regret being with Luke. But I _do_ regret hurting you in the process of discovering how I feel for him. And I know I keep saying it but I just want to make sure you understand that I am deeply sorry for messing things up and inflicting any type of pain on you."

"I understand that."

"And...one day in the future, I hope that you won't hate me. I know people always say this, usually after a highschool breakup but if being friends, maybe sometime in the future, was an option, I would like that very much."

"That would be nice. One day, maybe."

"Good."

"And for the record, I don't hate you. You're Lorelai, I could never hate you."

"You have all reasons to hate me, believe me."

He smiled sadly, nodding his hand before standing up. "Well talk, you know, about things."

_Things that happen next,_ she knew. And that was okay with her. Just like him, she was planning on learning how to accept it.

_And I can't live if you're not happy  
__I can't live if you cry  
__But I can live without if it makes you smile._

xxx

"This lamp was bigger than I remember." Lorelai said, removing a lamp from a huge box.

"We were just in the store two hours ago. How much was there to remember?"

"I thought it was smaller, that's all. It looked smaller on display."

Rory rolled her eyes. "If you say so."

"I do say so. So, you sure you don't want this in your room?"

"Mom," Rory said annoyed, "you got that for your room. I told you I didn't want that in my room the second we laid eyes on it. It's...it's worse than the monkey lamp."

"Hey, you loved that monkey lamp!"

"Yes, I did, but does it have any class? I wouldn't say so."

"And since when does class have to determine whether you want something or not. After all, you're dating Dean."

"Mom! You love Dean."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I couldn't think of anything else to say."

"Go put the lamp in your room."

"But--"

"No but's. Now go."

"Bossy."

Lorelai hauled the lamp up to her room which was gradually being filled more and more each day. She carried the awkwardness up the stairs to her room and set it in the corner where her dresser once was.

_It's nice to be back._ She breathed in deeply.

Consider it fate that the house wasn't ever put up for sale. Lorelai and Rory had ideas of selling it sometime in the near future but it happened to be that they weren't ready to sell it as soon as they moved into Max's house. It was their house. It had been their house since they were both young and rather immature, Rory with a reasonable purpose for that.

They had been back for almost four weeks. It was a very odd feeling, being back in their old house. Everything felt different. Sure they had to bring all of their belongings back to the house and had to start from scratch with something's but it was an effort they were willing to make.

It would have been nice, starting from scratch. But the two of them had such an attachment to that house, it was almost silly. If it weren't for Max's job location (which happened to be, yes, Rory's school also) Lorelai and Rory would have tried to get him to move into their house. They had so many memorable moments in that house neither wanted to forget.

The gossip mill had been strong lately. But it wasn't as strong as it probably could have been. Reason was, Lorelai hadn't seen or spoken to Luke since she left his apartment four weeks ago, when Caesar had interrupted their feud.

She had wanted to talk to him, to see him, to tell him what she needed to tell him but fear stood in the way of that. She was too nervous to let everything in. She knew from the first time she was _with _Luke that she wanted to be with him. But sometimes, after such a long haul, getting the thing you want turns out to be more frightening than imaginable.

The night before Lorelai and Max's wedding, Lorelai felt thousands of emotions. Mainly, she felt guilty for all the wrong she had committed. She wanted nothing more than to erase what had happened and forget anything was ever wrong. She didn't want to tell Max and receive forgiveness, she didn't want to just pretend it never happened, she clearly wanted to take it back.

But as the time passed, more and more thoughts clogged her head. She had changed her priorities. She knew more than ever what she wanted, but knew there was no physical way to receive it. To receive him. For a long time, she never once imagined Max finding out because she was too caught up with feeling so wonderful _because_ of Luke. But once Max finally found out, a switch went off in Lorelai's head alerting her that he was all hers.

At least that's what she thought.

But when she went to his apartment nearly a month ago, it seemed like he wanted nothing to do with her. Sure, he had probably been hurting, and sure she should have probably said more to him but they didn't have time to talk and knew that their conversation wasn't going anywhere because nobody was saying anything differently.

She meant to call, she did, but she realized after a while that if he wanted her back, he would call.

And he did. He called non-stop for two weeks, the first two weeks she was back in Stars Hollow but she was too scared to answer. She knew she would have to face him sometime, and though it hurt her _so_ much not to be with him, she figured a little break wouldn't hurt.

Plus, she needed time adapting. She needed time getting used to being back in Stars Hollow where the talking never ended. She needed time getting used to being single and unattached. She needed time to get her life in gear and figure out what exactly it is that she wants.

She had a pretty good idea on that last thing, getting what she wants, but that didn't avoid the fact that she had no idea how to go upon getting it.

A few nights ago, she attempted sleeping. It had rained all night and she felt the moist air pour in through her windows. Instead of sleeping, she studied the pattern on ceiling. White paint with small grooves everywhere. She stayed up for over two hours trying to figure out the name of those little grooves, the exact title for the design on her ceilings but couldn't think of them whatsoever. She turned her head away from the wall and glanced at the clock, not interpreting the red blinking numbers that read 3:42am. Instead, she reached right past the clock for the phone and dialed the first six digits of Luke's phone number, hanging up right before the seventh. She was surprised by her actions, almost weirded out that her first instinct would be to call Luke at nearly four AM just to ask what the design on her ceiling was.

That was when she realized she _has_ to talk to him.

And the more and more time that went by, the more and more she missed him. She figured they had been separated long enough. If he still felt anything like the way she did, hopefully this wouldn't be so tough.

So you could call it hopeful that he would just so happen to be at Doose's when she was.

"Hey kid, I'm running to Doose's real quick. Do you need anything?"

"Besides the toilet paper we've been needing for a week, I don't think so."

"Great, T.P., got it. I'll be back soon."

She grabbed her keys and headed towards the car. She decided to park somewhere near the front of the diner, hoping that Luke would see her. She was nervous, that's for sure, but lately, she's realized nothing more than how badly she needs him. She knew that since the last time they talked and would still know that till they finally talked.

She got out of the car and walked slowly past the diner in the direction of the store. She glanced in the diner as discretely as possible and saw Luke taking an order for a younger woman. Her stomach tossed and turned at the race of a roller coaster. She walked towards the door of the grocery store, head down, losing hope that he would see her and come out to approach her.

Plus, who did she think she was thinking _he_ would be the one to approach her first. After all, she was the one that had up and ditched him. Real smart.

She was almost too distracted to notice the bells ringing on the door across the way. It wasn't until she heard his voice that he finally had her attention.

"What are you getting?" He asked blandly, trying not to show any type of emotions. Something Luke would _definitely_ do.

She turned around quickly, making eye contact with his blue eyes. They looked rather dark today, she noticed. She glanced over him, admiring the scruff he wore on his face, the backwards baseball hat (like that was anything different) and her favorite blue flannel shirt.

She bit her lip, half smiling in his direction. "Toilet paper." She shrugged.

"Got it."

He glanced over her, taking in all the things he had missed so much in the past four weeks. She had no idea how much he missed her. Everything about her. Her smell, touch, looks, quirks, just...everything. He sighed heavily, looking at her almost amazed she was actually in front of him. It was almost too good to be true.

"Do you think we could talk?" He said, cutting to the chase.

Taken aback, Lorelai stared at him oddly. "Me?"

"I'd like to talk to you."

"Oh, well, I've...I mean, yeah, I think I can.

"Is my apartment okay?"

"Now?"

"Uhm, yeah."

Lorelai glanced up at his apartment, taking in the fact that shortly, she would be up there, again, alone, again, with Luke. Her heart beat rapidly before she nodded her head in his direction.

He walked towards the diner as she followed along behind him. They both walked straight into diner, not glancing at one person in the crowd, walking up the stairs to his apartment.

He held the door open for her as she walked into his apartment, the familiar smell making her stomach hurt. He closed the door behind them, the quiet noise echoing through the room.

"Would you like something to drink?" He asked genuinely. "Coffee?"

_Coffee._ She thought. She hadn't had Luke's coffee in over a month. She had craved it most everyday (okay fine, so that was an understatement) but never could get her hands on it.

"No thanks, I'm fine." Did she honestly just decline that pure heaven?

"Okay. So, you want to sit?"

"Sure."

The both walked over to the couch, awkwardly sitting down next to each other. Luke bent over and rested his head in his hands, adjusting his cap before looking up at her.

"So," she started slowly, "what's up."

"I don't know, you tell me." He asked, still civilized.

The look he was giving her almost broke her in half. His eyes were begging for some sort of answer. He _needed_ to hear something from her, he needed her to talk to him, all in hope for some sort of future together. She could have cried if she stayed looking at him for much longer, but she tore her eyes away from him and glanced down at the coffee table.

After a few minutes of nobody speaking, he spoke again. "The last time I talked to you, you told me you had just told Max."

"And you had told me that you didn't understand why I didn't just tell you in the first place."

"I still don't."

For some reason, that simple line caused Lorelai to explode. She jumped off of the couch and paced back and forth around the coffee table.

"What do you mean you don't understand why I didn't just tell you earlier that I never told Max? Do you honestly _not_ understand why?"

"It's not even that you didn't tell me. It's just that if we had to wait any longer without telling him, I felt like I would have exploded. I couldn't live under those circumstances any longer, Lorelai. I know that technically you were married to Max but I felt like, when you were _with _me, you were _with _me. And I wish I could have felt like that forever but the truth is, I was beginning to get annoyed with the whole thing. It wasn't all your fault that you hadn't told Max and I can see why you were putting it off more and more but to me, it was too much. I couldn't stand watching you be with me but going home to him. I just couldn't take it anymore."

"Which is exactly why I lied, Luke!"

"What do you mean?"

"Luke, what was our conversation about, the one night before I lied to you about telling Max?"

Luke thought hard for a moment before answering, "I told you I didn't think that I could go on anymore under our conditions."

"See!"

"See _what?_"

Man, if she didn't know he was the kind of guy that could distinguish the title of the grooves in her ceiling, she would seriously consider him a stupid guy.

"Do you really not get it, Luke? Do you not understand why?"

"Obviously not."

"Because, Luke!" She practically screamed. "How do you thing it feels to being _this_ close to losing the man you are in love with? I was going to loose you Luke, you were going to give up all because of one more stupid thing I had messed up on. I'm not saying that being with you all those times was stupid, believe me, I am saying far from, but you know me Luke," she laughed pathetically, "I mess up, _a lot._ Hell, I had a kid when I was sixteen, ran away and started with _nothing_ whatsoever. Believe me, the list could go on and on with mistakes I've made but if I could have stopped one thing from happening, it would be losing you because I simply couldn't live without you, Luke. And I know, I've done a damn good job making that previous statement seem like a lie because it has been about a month since we last talked but it just hurt to know that all this time that I could have been with you, I was only losing you more and more."

Luke looked at her, taking in the idiocy that filled his mind. How could he _not_ realize that? Sure he wasn't the smartest guy to put two and two together but hell, he knew you got four. He felt stupid, blind, almost insane that he hadn't realized all this time, she was trying to keep him from leaving.

"I didn't want to be selfish, but you and I, we were in this together. You knew that you were the one I've wanted all along, but I just needed time before everything could come together. And to know that you were going to leave, that hurt me Luke, that hurt like hell. I thought you would stick on my side all this time until everything finally was unraveled. Call me selfish, I don't mind, but that is honestly what I thought. And when I realized I was wrong, it scared me even more and I didn't know anything better than _to_ lie. It worked, at least for a little while, but maybe it was fate that you should have known the truth. That way, I could have worked things out myself and let you know when things could finally be normal with us. But all this time, I've had this vision of us doing this together, and I'm sorry if how I feel has nothing to do with how you really do feel, but all I'm saying is that's how _I_ felt."

She took a huge breath, her throat stinging slightly because of the speed and tone she was speaking in. She finally stopped pacing and stood still in front of Luke, looking down at him. He looked confused, but like he knew what he had to say - if that made any sense. But with Lorelai, obviously not much did.

"You should have counted on me, Lorelai."

She looked at him, encouraging him to continue.

"I told you the day before your wedding that I would stick this out with you. We were in this together, even if it was your marriage you were ruining - though I wish I could trade places with you - because it wasn't until a few minutes that I realized just how hard this probably was for you. I just think, it was so hard for us. And I'm not very good with words, you know that Lorelai, but this has made me realize a lot of things. I just think that this whole thing has been one crazy experience and the both of us feel so strongly about each other that it's hard to imagine us apart. And I think just as much as you wanted to keep me, I wanted to be with you, but it was hard knowing that even though you were with me, you still weren't mine. And I know, that's a lot to ask for, especially considering how long I have waited for you Lorelai, and I'll probably regret saying all this later because I'm sure you'll find some way to mock me, but I just want you to know I understand. I understand that you were hurting, I understand that you were scared, and I want you to know that I feel the exact same way."

Lorelai sighed deeply, holding back the tears from flowing out of her eyes. "I should have told you sooner. I should have told you four weeks ago when we last talked."

"Told me what?"

"That I'm in love with you."

Luke grinned, hell, he smiled, because he could hardly believe he was hearing those words coming from _her,_ Lorelai Gilmore's,mouth.

"I wouldn't think you don't if you tried that hard to keep me."

"Still, I want you to hear it from me."

He smiled, reaching out and pulling her down onto the couch with him. She held onto his hands, shivering because of all the rage. He rubbed her arm slowly in attempt to warm her up. After a few moments, he pulled her on top of him and kissed her slowly, savoring every moment.

He pulled away and brushed a strand of her hair back behind her ear.

He leaned forward, half a centimeter away from her ear, "well get through this Lorelai," he whispered very quietly, "together. Cause that's what you do when you're in love." He went in the extra mile and kissed her ear softly, not once but twice sending shivers through her whole body.

She wrapped one arm around his waist, pulling him as close as possible to her, the other one behind his head, around his neck.

She let out a small gasp, his breath tickling her face. She arranged herself halfway straddling his lap. She pressed her forehead against his, kissing him every few seconds.

"You know," she kissed him, "you're the only one," she moved down to his chin, kissing him softly, "that I would go through," she continued down to his neck, "this with." She ended with a kiss on his lips.

He raised an eyebrow at her.

"Cause you're the only one that's worth it."

xxx

_Cause I have **fallen in love **with you  
__No never, I'm never gonna stop falling in love with you  
__Close the door, lay down upon the floor  
__And by candlelight, make love to me through the night  
__Cause I have run away, I have runaway, yeah  
__I have runaway, runaway, I have runaway **with you.**_

xxx

--  
first group of lyrics were to the song, "Maybe it's Just Me" by Butch Walker and the ending lyrics were to my favorite song ever, Runaway by The Corrs.  
--

So weird to say it's over.

"...and, uhm, okay, so goodbye. That word sounds really lame and stupid right now, but there it is. Goodbye."

Thank you so much for reading - have you realized a trend with these WLBers? You get your happy ending! You all rock, please review and you'll have my 3 forever (though you all already do cause you guys are the best readers ever.)

Arrow down to the leeeeft and press 'go!' ;)

See you all next time!


End file.
